Quote of the Day: The Girl on Your Back

 

Once upon a time, two Buddhist monks, one young and one old, traveled from their temple in the mountains down to the nearest little town in the foothills of the Himalayas, to beg for alms. As they entered the peaceful valley with rice fields all around, they came to a wide river, by the side of which a beautiful young girl stood and wept.

The young monk’s mouth fell open, and he turned his back and covered his eyes, so as not to gaze upon a forbidden sight. But the older monk approached the girl and asked her what was wrong. “Oh, Sir Monk, she said, the river is too strong for me and I am afraid to cross it.” The old monk said, “Don’t worry, my dear. Climb up on my back, and I will carry you across.”

So she did. And he did.

When they reached the other side, he put the girl down, and she thanked him graciously, and ran off.

The young monk’s eyeballs almost fell out. If he had not, according to the custom of his fellows, shaved his head, his hair would have caught on fire. He was alternately horrified, and mortified, and furious. Truly, I tell you, smoke came out of his ears. He wiped the beads of sweat from his brow, and, the very picture of outrage, stalked the next 20 leagues, staring straight ahead, and without uttering a word. Eventually he had worked himself up into such a lather that he could contain himself no longer, and he burst forth with a cry:

“Master! We are celibate monks. Women are forbidden to us. How could you allow a woman to touch you, let alone carry her across the river on your back?”

The old monk thought for a moment, and then said, “My son, you saw me carry this girl a short distance across the river on my back. And then I put her down. We have walked for twenty leagues since then, and you have carried the girl on your back that whole distance. Why are you still carrying the girl on your back, and when will it be time for you to put her down?”


I first heard this little story when I was a college student, and I’ve never forgotten it. I was in an extended, and major, snit, and I was in a bit of a state. A very kind man, gently, but firmly, sat me down and sorted me out. I’m still grateful. I believe there are worse lessons to take to heart and to try to live by. What do you think?

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  1. She Member
    She
    @She

    Ontheleftcoast (View Comment):

    I heard a similar story, but in the setup there was only one wanderer, and he was a legendary physician (I don’t remember which one.) The woman is riding piggyback, and he is holding her wrists to stabilize her… and he surreptitiously takes her pulses. Rather than exhibiting the typical seasonal, diurnal, and emotional variation of a healthy person, or the even more complext pattern of a sick person, all 12 of her pulses are equal. By this he knew she was not human, but a goddess or other supernatural being.

    He stopped in the middle of the river, and threatened to drop her in unless she taught him the great secrets of medicine. She agreed, and he finished taking her across the river.

    She provided him with great secrets and he became widely renowned. But he didn’t find students worthy of the full teaching, so he withheld some of what she had taught him, hiding his manuscripts. This continued for generations until the great knowledge was lost, which exemplifies the reason why todays medicine is not as great as that of our predecessors.

    I’ve never heard that one!

    • #31
  2. TBA Coolidge
    TBA
    @RobtGilsdorf

    Hank Rhody, Red Hunter (View Comment):

    I first read that story in a book in the video game Icewind Dale. In that game the acolytes in question were actually lizard people in disguise who were kidnapping and eating people. Not that I think even a majority of Buddhists are like that in the real world.

    Suuuuuuure you don’t. 

    I know a racist lizard-whistle when I hear one. 

    • #32
  3. TBA Coolidge
    TBA
    @RobtGilsdorf

    KentForrester (View Comment):

    She (View Comment):

    Thanks for the comments, everyone. Like some of you, I see parallels with other faith traditions in this story.

    Ed G. (View Comment):

    The old monk had a point. It is a useful lesson.

    However, it could just as easily become rationalization and deflection. The question: why do you care so much? is a valid one. So too is: why did you think it right to break the code?

    Yes, that’s a good point. I made a similar one about a week ago on a different thread, and got what I thought was a fair response referencing the Sabbath being made for man, and not man for the Sabbath. I do agree that the pulchritudinous maiden in this story adds an interesting dimension to it. On that note, @kentforrester I see nothing in my story about the young lady being unclothed. Where on earth is your mind? I have no desire to be banned from Ricochet for corrupting the morals of the youth of America.

    Clothed? Don’t ruin the story for me, She. I picture her naked. The story becomes pale and unsatisfying for me if she is clothed.

    You can’t corrupt me. I was debauched long ago, much to my everlasting shame, by my current wife, both of us youngsters at the time, in a 1946 Dodge parked in a small parking spot, around midnight if I remember right, overlooking the city of Eugene, Oregon. Sad. 😔

    Your shocking sex scandal is now part of the internet, and you’ll never be president. 

    • #33
  4. TBA Coolidge
    TBA
    @RobtGilsdorf

    Ontheleftcoast (View Comment):

    I heard a similar story, but in the setup there was only one wanderer, and he was a legendary physician (I don’t remember which one.) The woman is riding piggyback, and he is holding her wrists to stabilize her… and he surreptitiously takes her pulses. Rather than exhibiting the typical seasonal, diurnal, and emotional variation of a healthy person, or the even more complext pattern of a sick person, all 12 of her pulses are equal. By this he knew she was not human, but a goddess or other supernatural being.

    He stopped in the middle of the river, and threatened to drop her in unless she taught him the great secrets of medicine. She agreed, and he finished taking her across the river.

    She provided him with great secrets and he became widely renowned. But he didn’t find students worthy of the full teaching, so he withheld some of what she had taught him, hiding his manuscripts. This continued for generations until the great knowledge was lost, which exemplifies the reason why todays medicine is not as great as that of our predecessors.

    So…it’s not because of Obamacare? 

    • #34
  5. TBA Coolidge
    TBA
    @RobtGilsdorf

    Phthui mglw’nafh Cthulhu R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn! 

    • #35
  6. Percival Thatcher
    Percival
    @Percival

    TBA (View Comment):
    Your shocking sex scandal is now part of the internet, and you’ll never be president. 

    My work here is done.

    • #36
  7. KentForrester Coolidge
    KentForrester
    @KentForrester

    TBA (View Comment):

    Phthui mglw’nafh Cthulhu R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn!

    Wow, I didn’t think I’d ever meet Sanskrit on Ricochet, an ancient language that I read and write fluently.

    The best translation of the above passage (though the past pluperfect of “fhtagn” gives me a bit of trouble) is this:

          Who grunch but the eggplant over there?

    • #37
  8. Arahant Member
    Arahant
    @Arahant

    KentForrester (View Comment):
    Wow, I didn’t think I’d ever meet Sanskrit on Ricochet,

    Keep looking.

    • #38
  9. Vectorman Inactive
    Vectorman
    @Vectorman

    Quake Voter (View Comment):

    9thDistrictNeighbor (View Comment):

    Quake Voter (View Comment):
    The girl I sat next to on the school bus during 6th grade has been living rent-free in a small room in my head for 40 years.

    Wait, so you’re Charlie Brown and she’s the little red-haired girl?

    Nah, I wasn’t much of a Charlie Brown type until I started supporting a Republican Party dedicated to balanced budgets and immigration enforcement. It’s been me, Lucy and the football for a long time!

     

    • #39
  10. She Member
    She
    @She

    TBA (View Comment):

    Phthui mglw’nafh Cthulhu R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn!

    I’ll rarely have a better lead-in to a story I’ve told before on Ricochet, apologies to those of you who’ve heard it already:

    So: Mr. She and I are in Wales, on what was, up until then, the trip of a lifetime (I’ve had a few more since, with varying degrees of success).  We’re staying in a little cottage at the foot of Mt. Snowden, this one, in fact (I can’t recommend it highly enough).  

    Its connectivity may have had an upgrade by now, but at the time we were there, the outside world came to us through a tiny portable black-and-white television with rabbit ears, and I turned it on to see what the local channels looked like, while I made dinner.

    As was the case all those years ago, it took the thing the better part of a minute to get warmed up, and for the picture and sound to appear.  By the time it did, I’d got my back to it and was chopping onions.  So when I heard several male voices speaking an unintelligible language, I thought, “How nice, they still have Welsh programming on, at least part of the day,” and I turned to look and see if it was the news, or a show about gardening, something else.

    It was Star Trek.  And the speakers were Klingons.

    (I have since developed and tested the following thesis, and have found it to be invariably true:  Wherever you are in the world, on whatever day of the week, and at whatever time of the day, if you turn on local television and riffle through the channels, sooner or later you will find an episode of one or the other Star Trek series in full cry.  I don’t think I’ve had a failure yet.)

    • #40
  11. She Member
    She
    @She

    Ontheleftcoast (View Comment):

    I heard a similar story, but in the setup there was only one wanderer, and he was a legendary physician (I don’t remember which one.) The woman is riding piggyback, and he is holding her wrists to stabilize her… and he surreptitiously takes her pulses. Rather than exhibiting the typical seasonal, diurnal, and emotional variation of a healthy person, or the even more complext pattern of a sick person, all 12 of her pulses are equal. By this he knew she was not human, but a goddess or other supernatural being.

    He stopped in the middle of the river, and threatened to drop her in unless she taught him the great secrets of medicine. She agreed, and he finished taking her across the river.

    She provided him with great secrets and he became widely renowned. But he didn’t find students worthy of the full teaching, so he withheld some of what she had taught him, hiding his manuscripts. This continued for generations until the great knowledge was lost, which exemplifies the reason why todays medicine is not as great as that of our predecessors.

    The more I think about this story, the more interesting it becomes.

    Mr. She’s theory about the history of medicine is that it can pretty much be summed up as man’s struggle to qualify and categorize what ails him, and, having discovered the proximate cause of each instance, to move it from the  column titled “Evil Spirits” over into the column titled “Bugs.”  I think that’s largely true.

     

    • #41
  12. PHCheese Inactive
    PHCheese
    @PHCheese

    She (View Comment):

    Ontheleftcoast (View Comment):

    I heard a similar story, but in the setup there was only one wanderer, and he was a legendary physician (I don’t remember which one.) The woman is riding piggyback, and he is holding her wrists to stabilize her… and he surreptitiously takes her pulses. Rather than exhibiting the typical seasonal, diurnal, and emotional variation of a healthy person, or the even more complext pattern of a sick person, all 12 of her pulses are equal. By this he knew she was not human, but a goddess or other supernatural being.

    He stopped in the middle of the river, and threatened to drop her in unless she taught him the great secrets of medicine. She agreed, and he finished taking her across the river.

    She provided him with great secrets and he became widely renowned. But he didn’t find students worthy of the full teaching, so he withheld some of what she had taught him, hiding his manuscripts. This continued for generations until the great knowledge was lost, which exemplifies the reason why todays medicine is not as great as that of our predecessors.

    The more I think about this story, the more interesting it becomes.

    Mr. She’s theory about the history of medicine is that it can pretty much be summed up as man’s struggle to qualify and categorize what ails him, and, having discovered the proximate cause of each instance, to move it from the column titled “Evil Spirits” over into the column titled “Bugs.” I think that’s largely true.

     

    One of the first things taught in medical school besides arrogance and  pomposity is do no harm. Twice I have had harm done to me by my doctor. I was  prescribed cholesterol medicine that caused gallstones. The surgeon that removed my gallbladder somehow caused my appendix to move around and get stuck in the scar tissue he created. It was pressing on my bladder for 8 years. I hope I broke the cycle.

    • #42
  13. JimGoneWild Coolidge
    JimGoneWild
    @JimGoneWild

    I though this was going to be a joke about Catholic priests.

    • #43
  14. Hank Rhody, Red Hunter Contributor
    Hank Rhody, Red Hunter
    @HankRhody

    She (View Comment):
    It was Star Trek. And the speakers were Klingons.

    If the Great Old Ones existed someone would have summoned one by accident by now, simply from speaking Welsh.

    • #44
  15. Hank Rhody, Red Hunter Contributor
    Hank Rhody, Red Hunter
    @HankRhody

    PHCheese (View Comment):
    I hope I broke the cycle.

    Is that how this Buddhism thing works?

    • #45
  16. T-Fiks Member
    T-Fiks
    @TFiks

    She (View Comment):

    KentForrester (View Comment):

    Phthui? Is that a variation of “pooey?” Or “patootie,” as in “cutie patootie”? Or is it “phthuey” in Sanskrit?

    Yes. Showoff.

    I don’t think”Phthui” is any of those things. It’s straightforward onomatopoeia. It’s the sound managers used to make while leaning on the dugout steps and spitting, right before they walked out to pull a pitcher that was getting shelled.

     

    • #46
  17. Percival Thatcher
    Percival
    @Percival

    Pfui. You’re all wrong.

    • #47
  18. TBA Coolidge
    TBA
    @RobtGilsdorf

    Percival (View Comment):

    Pfui. You’re all wrong.

    There’s only one way to settle this; what does today’s New York Times style manual say? 

    • #48
  19. Percival Thatcher
    Percival
    @Percival

    TBA (View Comment):

    Percival (View Comment):

    Pfui. You’re all wrong.

    There’s only one way to settle this; what does today’s New York Times style manual say?

    I got it from Rex Stout when I was ten years old. That is the way he spelled it when Nero Wolfe said it.

    • #49
  20. Seawriter Contributor
    Seawriter
    @Seawriter

    Percival (View Comment):

    TBA (View Comment):

    Percival (View Comment):

    Pfui. You’re all wrong.

    There’s only one way to settle this; what does today’s New York Times style manual say?

    I got it from Rex Stout when I was ten years old. That is the way he spelled it when Nero Wolfe said it.

    Wolfe was Montenegran.

    • #50
  21. Percival Thatcher
    Percival
    @Percival

    Seawriter (View Comment):

    Percival (View Comment):

    TBA (View Comment):

    Percival (View Comment):

    Pfui. You’re all wrong.

    There’s only one way to settle this; what does today’s New York Times style manual say?

    I got it from Rex Stout when I was ten years old. That is the way he spelled it when Nero Wolfe said it.

    Wolfe was Montenegran.

    Wolfe was the illegitimate child of Sherlock Holmes and Irene Adler after the Reichenbach Falls affair.

    • #51
  22. Seawriter Contributor
    Seawriter
    @Seawriter

    Percival (View Comment):

    Seawriter (View Comment):

    Percival (View Comment):

    TBA (View Comment):

    Percival (View Comment):

    Pfui. You’re all wrong.

    There’s only one way to settle this; what does today’s New York Times style manual say?

    I got it from Rex Stout when I was ten years old. That is the way he spelled it when Nero Wolfe said it.

    Wolfe was Montenegran.

    Wolfe was the illegitimate child of Sherlock Holmes and Irene Adler after the Reichenbach Falls affair.

    So says one overambitious Nero Wolfe fan who smoked too much wacky tobaccy. If it’s not from Stout, it is not canon.

    • #52
  23. Mole-eye Inactive
    Mole-eye
    @Moleeye

    Bryan G. Stephens (View Comment):

    Also a favorite story of mine. I need to keep hearing it. I like to pick up all sorts of things, not just people, but worries about the future. Makes me think I am in more control than I am.

    Bingo!  Me too.

    • #53
  24. CarolJoy Coolidge
    CarolJoy
    @CarolJoy

    Hank Rhody, Red Hunter (View Comment):

    I first read that story in a book in the video game Icewind Dale. In that game the acolytes in question were actually lizard people in disguise who were kidnapping and eating people. Not that I think even a majority of Buddhists are like that in the real world.

    I am assuming that Buddhists cannot kidnap and eat people, since they are supposed to be aware of the feelings of all sentient beings. So a true Buddhist would be a vegan.

    They could however kidnap you and make you chant until you are completely overpowered by the smell of incense.

    • #54
  25. Boss Mongo Member
    Boss Mongo
    @BossMongo

    I love that story.

    Thanks, She!

    • #55
  26. Django Member
    Django
    @Django

    One day a master known far and wide for his wisdom was walking in his garden when he was approached by a novice who asked how he too might be wise. “My wisdom”, the master said, “derives solely from my daily partaking of the Gems of Wisdom.” So saying, the master brought out a small pouch containing several small brown balls that he poured into the hand of the novice. The novice began to eat eagerly. As the master watched, the face of the novice grew dark and he spat out the uneaten balls crying, “Oh Master, these Gems of Wisdom are but balls of parrot dung.” The master then withdrew saying, “Behold, seeker of knowledge, thy wisdom has increased greatly already.”

    • #56
  27. She Member
    She
    @She

    Django (View Comment):

    One day a master known far and wide for his wisdom was walking in his garden when he was approached by a novice who asked how he too might be wise. “My wisdom”, the master said, “derives solely from my daily partaking of the Gems of Wisdom.” So saying, the master brought out a small pouch containing several small brown balls that he poured into the hand of the novice. The novice began to eat eagerly. As the master watched, the face of the novice grew dark and he spat out the uneaten balls crying, “Oh Master, these Gems of Wisdom are but balls of parrot dung.” The master then withdrew saying, “Behold, seeker of knowledge, thy wisdom has increased greatly already.”

    Wonderful!  A family friendly recounting of that story, which, in a slightly different (and more vulgar) version, I’ve heard before.  Thanks.

    • #57
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