(Mis)understood Words

 

Have you ever heard a word used by someone who clearly didn’t understand it? Sometimes, it is the pronunciation (corpseman, obgynie), sometimes it’s totally the wrong word. And sometimes, the wrong word almost makes sense — those are my favorites.

One of my first examples was in the 6th grade when the teacher was explaining the circulatory system. He kept talking about the “Red Blood Corpsuckles.” I was in my wanting-to-be-a-doctor phase, was pretty sure that was not right, and did my best to correct him. (I’m still in my obnoxious-kid stage.)

My first boss in “the real world” was taking a weekly Dale Carnegie self-improvement course when I first started working for him. I could always tell what the lesson for the week was. For example, in the “get to know your coworkers” week, he took me to lunch. During “improve your vocabulary” week, he told me he was being “undulated” by paperwork. I thought the visual image was actually pretty good.

A co-worker used to talk about getting “to the crust” of the matter and sometimes, he would argue that an item was a “mute” point. In both cases, the wrong word sort of made sense.

At the same company, a line supervisor used to talk about someone coming up with a “good ideal.” I think she was the same one that one that once referred to the roots of her hair as “hair fossils.”

It is pretty common for one of our dogs to figure out what we are about to do before we even talk about it. At one of these times, my wife turned to me and said: “He must have ESPN.”

Sometimes, I worry that I am guilty of this mistake at times. I’ve always heard “it’s time to go to the mat” with respect to fighting a particular issue. That made sense to me; I was a wrestler in high hchool and “going to the mat” had a specific meaning. In the last two weeks, I’ve heard the phrase “go to the mattress” at least three times. I am no longer sure which is correct.

What about you — have you come across any of these? I’m particularly interested in the ones where the wrong word almost makes sense.

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  1. Tex929rr Coolidge
    Tex929rr
    @Tex929rr

    Texas place pronounciations are difficult for newcomers.

    Leakey:  Lake-ee 

    Boerne:  bernie

    Some are the result of mispronounced Spanish names:

    Mexia:  muh-hay-uh

    Bexar:  bear 

    One of my personal faves is Iraan:  Ira-Ann

    • #91
  2. Major Major Major Major Member
    Major Major Major Major
    @OldDanRhody

    From a high school teacher’s compilation of examples from students’ papers:

    Achilles’ mother dipped him in the river Stinks until he became intolerable.

    • #92
  3. philo Member
    philo
    @philo

    RightAngles (View Comment): I can’t stand it when people add a syllable to “mischievous” and pronounce it “mischiev-i – ous.” I mean how do you look at that word and say it that way?

    Ok, I will admit it. This is one that I would pronounce one way (improper) if I was saying it in conversation and the other (proper) way if I was reading it. 

    Oh well, as long as I don’t use it as my safe word, any potential confusion should be of minimal harm. (A teleprompter may not always be a convenient solution for my linguistic short falls.)   Maybe “naughty” is a better alternative…

    • #93
  4. Midget Faded Rattlesnake Member
    Midget Faded Rattlesnake
    @Midge

    Suspira (View Comment):

    Midget Faded Rattlesnake (View Comment):
    Antipodes is not pronounced anti-poads.

    My computer dictionary says it is pronounced anti-poads. Just looked it up in my OED. It agrees.

    Huh. Wikipedia gives the pronunciation as /ænˈtɪpədiːs/ — that is, an-Tip-uh-Dees, which is how I have always heard it. 

    Well, we learn something new every day. Antipodes is amphibious!

    • #94
  5. Arahant Member
    Arahant
    @Arahant

    Midget Faded Rattlesnake (View Comment):
    Wikipedia gives the pronunciation as /ænˈtɪpədiːs/ — that is, an-Tip-uh-Dees, which is how I have always heard it.

    This is also how my dictionary has it. Another dictionary has a singular, antipode, of only three syllables, but shows the plural, antipodes, as four. I generally use and trust the first dictionary more. The second, I only have and use because it has dates as to when a word came into use.

    • #95
  6. Steve C. Member
    Steve C.
    @user_531302

    Douglas Pratt (View Comment):

    Back when Carl Reiner and Mel Brooks were making improve comedy LPs (starting with The 2000 Year Old Man) they had regular bits where Reiner would play a man-on-the-street reporter. One of my favorites:

    Reiner: Excuse me, sir, you look like an actor.

    Brooks: Why yes, I am a lesbian.

    Reiner: Thespian?

    Brooks: I’ll never make that mistake again.

    Here’s your knife.

    Sword.

    Whatever.

    • #96
  7. Steve C. Member
    Steve C.
    @user_531302

    Arahant (View Comment):

    Miffed White Male (View Comment):

    (This originally appeared on twitter with the caption “You’d think she’d look happier”).

    I’ve been near Climax. It’s nothing to write home about. Now, Hell, Michigan is a bit more fun.

    I knew a man from Paradise, Michigan. He claimed it was a common saying in his hometown that, “If you don’t like it here. You can always go to Hell.”

    • #97
  8. Songwriter Inactive
    Songwriter
    @user_19450

    Judge Mental (View Comment):

    TRibbey (View Comment):

    barbara lydick (View Comment):

    Houston – New York = Houseton

    Houston – Texas = Houston

    Ooh, yes. Madrid, Spain = Muhdrid. Madrid, Iowa = Mahdrid.

    Lima, Ohio is pronounced like the bean.

    In Nashville, there is Lafayette Street – pronounced “laFAYet.” And there is the nearby town of Santa Fe, pronounced “Santa FEE.”  And just south of the metroplex is Maury County, pronounced “murree.”

     

    • #98
  9. Miffed White Male Member
    Miffed White Male
    @MiffedWhiteMale

    In Wisconsin there is a city Berlin (pronounced like the German Capitol) and also a New Berlin, pronounced New BURR-len.

    • #99
  10. RightAngles Member
    RightAngles
    @RightAngles

    Bob Thompson (View Comment):

    RightAngles (View Comment):

    I can’t stand it when people add a syllable to “mischievous” and pronounce it “mischiev-i – ous.” I mean how do you look at that word and say it that way?

    And what syllable do you accent?

    MIS-che vuss

    • #100
  11. Bob Thompson Member
    Bob Thompson
    @BobThompson

    RightAngles (View Comment):

    Bob Thompson (View Comment):

    RightAngles (View Comment):

    I can’t stand it when people add a syllable to “mischievous” and pronounce it “mischiev-i – ous.” I mean how do you look at that word and say it that way?

    And what syllable do you accent?

    MIS-che vuss

    It is difficult to add the irritating extra syllable when the accent is where it should be.

    • #101
  12. RightAngles Member
    RightAngles
    @RightAngles

    I’ve seen more than one instance lately of  “deign”  used as a synonym for “dare.”   I can’t recall where I keep seeing this, but  I see sentences such as “Anyone who deigns to speak out is punished.”   “Deign” means to condescend, as in “She thought she was too good for us and we should be grateful when she deigned to speak to us”  

    • #102
  13. RightAngles Member
    RightAngles
    @RightAngles

    Tex929rr (View Comment):

    Texas place pronounciations are difficult for newcomers.

    Leakey: Lake-ee

    Boerne: bernie

    Some are the result of mispronounced Spanish names:

    Mexia: muh-hay-uh

    Bexar: bear

    One of my personal faves is Iraan: Ira-Ann

    And in Austin, we have Burnett Road, pronounced BURN-it. I always wondered if the guy they named it after had a daughter-in-law, and if she called him Dad Burnit.

    • #103
  14. Bob Thompson Member
    Bob Thompson
    @BobThompson

    I attended public school in the fifties. Here’s an observation I think carries an important message. I had one English teacher who placed emphasis on spelling and another who emphasized grammatical usage and construction. These two I remember and no others. I wonder why I remember these teachers, their names and their images, but no other English teachers? I don’t know if what I was taught is considered important in public schools today. I have my doubts arising from my perception that the teaching of our history and the meaning of our Constitution is missing.

    I should have said ‘spelling and definitions’ above.

    And I should have included ‘pronunciation’.

    • #104
  15. RightAngles Member
    RightAngles
    @RightAngles

    Bob Thompson (View Comment):

    I attended public school in the fifties. Here’s an observation I think carries an important message. I had one English teacher who placed emphasis on spelling and another who emphasized grammatical usage and construction. These two I remember and no others. I wonder why I remember these teachers, their names and their images, but no other English teachers? I don’t know if what I was taught is considered important in public schools today. I have my doubts arising from my perception that the teaching of our history and the meaning of our Constitution is missing.

    I should have said ‘spelling and definitions’ above.

    Same here. I still remember the teacher who taught us how to parse a sentence and had us memorize poetry. (I also still remember the poetry)

    • #105
  16. RightAngles Member
    RightAngles
    @RightAngles

    I don’t like to see “squash” when they mean “quash.”  You squash a bug, you quash free speech.

    • #106
  17. Judge Mental Member
    Judge Mental
    @JudgeMental

    Judge Mental (View Comment):

    Ontheleftcoast (View Comment):

    Judge Mental (View Comment):

    Miffed White Male (View Comment):

    Nohaaj (View Comment):

    Arahant (View Comment):

    Midget Faded Rattlesnake (View Comment):

    Hyperbole is not pronounced hyper-bowl.
    Apostrophe is not prounounced apo-strof.
    Antipodes is not pronounced anti-poads.

    But for some reason, asymptote is pronounced asym-tote. Just one syllable at the end, where the others have two.

    Hermione agrees that this is strange.

    As a young parent, I read a Burt and Ernie story about Penelope (as in antelope, cantaloupe, etc) many hundreds of times before someone who overheard and was paying attention finally corrected me. “pen-el-o-pee”. I had no idea, having never heard the name out loud before…

     

    There was a newspaper comic strip in the 60s and 70s called Priscilla’s Pop.

    I pronounced it Pri-SICK-uh-luh.

    And I was probably a teenager before I found out the type of car was pronounced Se-DAN instead of SEED-an.

     

    Bugs Bunny introduced me to the word, ‘ignoranemous’. It was years before I found out the right way to say it, and it still sounds wrong to me.

    What a maroon.

    ‘Ignoranemous’ is probably a euphemism for “ignoranus” which would have been in character for Bugs.

    Ignoramus, but your spelling is way funnier.

    Thinking about it, the etymology of ignoranus would literally work out to dumb-ass.

    • #107
  18. RightAngles Member
    RightAngles
    @RightAngles

    WillowSpring (View Comment):

    When my wife was small, she thought the hymn was about

    ”Gladly the cross-eyed bear”

    this has been great. When I wrote the OP, I thought I might get a couple of replies with examples, but my wife and I have been laughing with each batch.

    Hahaha! I love this one. The mental image!

    • #108
  19. Western Chauvinist Member
    Western Chauvinist
    @WesternChauvinist

    Hoo!! These are great. My contribution will be meager, but…

    When Chauvinist the Elder was little, she’d ask for a “kiss-you” when she needed to blow her nose. We didn’t correct her until she was 15 or so, it was so stinkin‘ cute. 

    Limon, Colorado is pronounced, LIE mon, not Lee MOAN as the (pretentious) Google lady says. 

    Mr. Trink has a whole dictionary of these he makes up for fun. We should get him in here @thekd45

     

    • #109
  20. RightAngles Member
    RightAngles
    @RightAngles

    When my sister was in grade school, she checked out a library book called “Nanette and the Chateau.”  She pronounced it “Chat a hew.” We still laugh about it. She ended up with a degree in French.

    • #110
  21. RightAngles Member
    RightAngles
    @RightAngles

    When I was little, I thought the Christmas carol said “O Come, Augie Faithful,” and I always wondered who he was.

    • #111
  22. Jules PA Inactive
    Jules PA
    @JulesPA

    JustmeinAZ (View Comment):
    So often I read someone who wants to say “voila!” but writes “viola!” Cracks me up.

    As a violist, I do that on purpose! Cracks me up. 😂

    Parma Jawn. 

    Fellow Knee. Mister meaner. 

    Rotflol. 

    • #112
  23. RightAngles Member
    RightAngles
    @RightAngles

    Jules PA (View Comment):

    JustmeinAZ (View Comment):
    So often I read someone who wants to say “voila!” but writes “viola!” Cracks me up.

    As a violist, I do that on purpose! Cracks me up. 😂

    Parma Jawn.

    Fellow Knee. Mister meaner.

    Rotflol.

    The result of a couple of generations of kids never seeing words in print.

    • #113
  24. OccupantCDN Coolidge
    OccupantCDN
    @OccupantCDN

    Irregardless used to be a word that I would use, but it just means regardless so I find irregardless to be a redundant word have excised it from use.

    Climax is a town name in Canada – there are Climax’s in Saskatchewan and BC, there are a number of business names that also incorporate Climax, my favorite is a personal trainer in Kelowna BC “Climax Conditioning”… The imagination runs wild with just how personal this training could be. I wonder if undercover vice ever made appointments…

     

    • #114
  25. RightAngles Member
    RightAngles
    @RightAngles

    OccupantCDN (View Comment):

    Irregardless used to be a word that I would use, but it just means regardless so I find irregardless to be a redundant word have excised it from use.

    Climax is a town name in Canada – there are Climax’s in Saskatchewan and BC, there are a number of business names that also incorporate Climax, my favorite is a personal trainer in Kelowna BC “Climax Conditioning”… The imagination runs wild with just how personal this training could be. I wonder if undercover vice ever made appointments…

    Ha! And there’s an Intercourse, PA and a Cut and Shoot, Texas. And we can’t forget Screamer, Alabama. And never say “irregardless” again.

    • #115
  26. OccupantCDN Coolidge
    OccupantCDN
    @OccupantCDN

    RightAngles (View Comment):
    Ha! And there’s an Intercourse, PA and a Cut and Shoot, Texas. And we can’t forget Screamer, Alabama. And never say “irregardless” again.

    There is also (or was) Swastika, On (changed its name after WWii) Didlo, NFLD. Killam AB (the travel destination that leads to murder plots) Wawa On, Placentia, Nfld. Ma-Me-O Beach Ab. Moose Jaw, Sk. Vulcan Ab. Dead Man’s Flats, AB. 

    Could start a thread of the weirdest town name – of a place that you’ve actually visited?

    • #116
  27. Saint Augustine Member
    Saint Augustine
    @SaintAugustine

    OccupantCDN (View Comment):

    Could start a thread of the weirdest town name – of a place that you’ve actually visited?

    Oh, yes.  That would be great.

    • #117
  28. Annegeles Reagan
    Annegeles
    @Annegeles

    The people of Portland, OR, think you’re the weirdo if you don’t know that Couch Street is pronounced Cooch.  

    I’ve heard many people say “supposebly.”  

    And “Rhododendrum.”  

    My mother dated a man named Dick Pease.   Luckily, she didn’t marry him.  

    • #118
  29. Miffed White Male Member
    Miffed White Male
    @MiffedWhiteMale

     

    Annegeles (View Comment):
    I’ve heard many people say “supposebly.”

    Don’t forget people who get books from the LIE-berry.

    And this spectacular headline from the onion, oh so many years ago.

     

    African-American Neighborhood Terrorized By Ask Murderer

    • #119
  30. JustmeinAZ Member
    JustmeinAZ
    @JustmeinAZ

    Miffed White Male (View Comment):
    African-American Neighborhood Terrorized By Ask Murderer

    Made me LOL.

     

    • #120
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