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Understanding: Who’s That Girl?
My baby sister was only waist-high to me, in the family photograph taken the summer before I went away to college. The busy summers home, working nights a couple years, did not cause much adjustment to my mental image of my youngest sister. The year I graduated, I was commissioned into the Army. Duty began immediately, as I worked for the ROTC detachment until reporting to Fort Bliss, TX, for the Officer Basic Course.
This was before the digital age, so long distance calls were expensive between states. A call from my apartment in Germany, where I served for three wonderful years, would make a dent in my junior officer pay. So, the years went by without my baby sister, 10 years my junior, changing in my mind’s eye.
It was likely while I was back stateside, for a five-month Officer Advanced Course, that I got a call one evening, or weekend, from a young woman. Her conversation was not that of a child. She had definite opinions, and could ably advance them. Suddenly that family photograph was completely out of date, as I came to realize my little sister was a young woman.
Now, she is approaching middle age. This realization shreds any lingering self-denial of the rapidly turning pages in my life’s calendar. She has a daughter with a gift of understanding. When my niece visits her grandmother, who loves British mystery shows, she quietly smiles and looks at my mother as soon as the opening scene is done. If Mom asks, her granddaughter will whisper whodunnit. She is always right. She sees through the misdirection and picks out the essential clue.
So, the successful woman, who changed my understanding of her with a single phone call, has a daughter with perception who already commands the respect of adults. How has time and distance changed your understanding of family or friends?
Published in Group Writing
I graduated from college in 1986, so the title came to mind with a musical hook. I had the hook from Madonna’s 1987 song in my head, not the musically more interesting 1990 Eurythmics’ tune of the same name.
Annie Lennox is clearly superior as a singer, but without the starburst pop appeal Madonna so carefully managed for a season.
My mother was the tail end of five. Her eldest sister was twenty-one years older than she was, and had married at about eighteen, so was out of the house before Mother was born. Aunt M. had a surviving child who was only two years younger than Mother. She grew up very close to her niece, and her elder sister probably saw her more like a niece than a sister. Over the years, they had several encounters that indicated that Aunt M. might not see her as ever having grown up. Finally, my mother posited a theory that the youngest in the family is always retarded. I would tell more of the story, but I just realized (understood) that I should save this for a date later in the month.
This conversation is an entry in our Group Writing Series under July’s theme of Understanding. If you’ve ever had any sort of epiphany or lightbulb turn on, why not come join us?
No answer to your question, but I really enjoyed reading this post.
Marlo Thomas?
My baby brother came over for a visit with his lovely wife………Because he’s retired!!!