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And Time Keeps Rolling Along…

 

I’m currently on vacation in Ireland with my family. My oldest daughter has six weeks off before she has to go back to college to start basketball practice for the coming season. My middle daughter moves away to college this fall. My youngest will be a junior in high school and travels a lot with sports, so she’s not around as much as I would like. For years, my girls were rarely apart, now they’re rarely together, and that makes me so sad. Of course, the whole point of raising kids is to create independent, self-sufficient adults, so I guess this is exactly what we’ve been trying to accomplish for the past 20 years. So, good for us. But this hurts. Especially because when I think of my girls, this is what I see:

A few weeks ago, we decided to recreate that picture – have everybody sit in the same order, in the same pose, with the same facial expressions, and so on. I knew it would be a bit different, but I still found it startling:

The pictures are 16 years apart. My girls were so tiny before, and now they’re 6’4”, 5’10”, and 6’3”. You can hardly even see my 6’1″ wife in the second picture, which strikes me as symbolic.

And time keeps rolling along.

We’re happiest when we dream of better tomorrows, and we’re sad when we realize that the past is gone, and it’s not coming back. So, it’s all good. This is how things are supposed to go. I’m not complaining.

Well, I guess I am. But I shouldn’t be.

We’re having a great time touring around – Ireland really is beautiful. Although to me, the really beautiful part is getting my little girls together, even for a brief time. At times like this, everything is right in the universe.

Well, everything except the pain felt by an old man, as he curses the passage of time.

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There are 36 comments.

  1. 1
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  1. Member

    Hey, it gets better as they get older. Pretty soon careers, marriage, and . . . grandkids.

    Whoot! (or, if you are like me, bwa-ha-ha-hah.)

    • #1
    • June 13, 2018 at 5:52 am
    • 6 likes
  2. Thatcher

    Great “then and now” pictures, and your youngest made sure she put on the same face as the baby pic. That baby pic might do for a “meme” pose. Thought bubble: Move over sisters, you’re hogging my limelight!

    Did you meet up with @paddysiochain?

    • #2
    • June 13, 2018 at 6:07 am
    • 5 likes
  3. Member

    Hold on it even gets faster. Don’t miss the Aran Islands in Ireland.

    • #3
    • June 13, 2018 at 6:08 am
    • 6 likes
  4. Thatcher

    Before I had kids, I did not realize that they were the most wonderful life sentence a man could have. 

     

    • #4
    • June 13, 2018 at 6:11 am
    • 14 likes
  5. Member

    How nice! I’m in the same boat. My youngest (27) was just home for a few days … time he tacked on to the end of a business trip. And my oldest (29) took some vacation days so we got the chance to be together again. And it’s amazing how, no matter their actual age or achievements, in your head they are still 8. 

    • #5
    • June 13, 2018 at 6:12 am
    • 5 likes
  6. Member

    RushBabe49 (View Comment):
    Great “then and now” pictures, and your youngest made sure she put on the same face as the baby pic.

    Actually, they all did, if you look carefully.

    Ekosj (View Comment):
    And it’s amazing how, no matter their actual age or achievements, in your head they are still 8. 

    And somehow in your head you are always 12 to 15 when you talk to your dad. (At least that is how it was for me on my Saturday morning calls to him. Look, Dad! See what I did this week.)

    • #6
    • June 13, 2018 at 6:16 am
    • 5 likes
  7. Thatcher

    Seawriter (View Comment):

    RushBabe49 (View Comment):
    Great “then and now” pictures, and your youngest made sure she put on the same face as the baby pic.

    Actually, they all did, if you look carefully.

    Ekosj (View Comment):
    And it’s amazing how, no matter their actual age or achievements, in your head they are still 8.

    And somehow in your head you are always 12 to 15 when you talk to your dad. (At least that is how it was for me on my Saturday morning calls to him. Look, Dad! See what I did this week.)

    Having my dad see me at work has been a great pleasure. 

    • #7
    • June 13, 2018 at 6:18 am
    • 5 likes
  8. Member

    Dr. Bastiat: they’re 6’4”, 5’10”, and 6’3”

    To borrow a phrase from the Crocodile Hunter, the late Steve Irwin … “Crikies, that’s a big’n”

    What did you guys do? HGH in the Corn Flakes?

    The Bastiat family must be hell-on-wheels at the block-party volleyball games!

    • #8
    • June 13, 2018 at 6:18 am
    • 6 likes
  9. Thatcher

    Your youngest was clearly struggling to hold the frown. In a way, a great compliment to her father.

    • #9
    • June 13, 2018 at 6:22 am
    • 7 likes
  10. Member
    Dr. Bastiat Post author

    Ekosj (View Comment):

    Dr. Bastiat: they’re 6’4”, 5’10”, and 6’3”

    To borrow a phrase from the Crocodile Hunter, the late Steve Irwin … “Crikies, that’s a big’n”

    What did you guys do? HGH in the Corn Flakes?

    The Bastiat family must be hell-on-wheels at the block-party volleyball games!

    I’m 6’2″, which is not all that unusual for a man. And my parents aren’t that tall (6’1″ & 5’10”). But my wife is 6’1″, and two of my daughters got their height from her. A 6’4″ woman is equivalent to a 6’11” man, so that’s pretty unusual. Our 6’3″ baby is growing like a weed right now, so we’re not sure how tall she’ll be.

    Our middle child is probably the only 5’10” girl on the planet with a short complex.

    And you’re right. We get noticed. We walk into a restaurant, and everybody stares.

    It’s hard for a girl to be that tall. When asked by a 5’2″ blonde “My God – how tall are you?” my oldest sometimes responds, 5’16”. Dating is difficult. Other girls can be mean sometimes. It’s tough to find cute shoes in a size 14. Luckily, they’re pretty girls. That helps.

    But you can’t hide. It wears on them sometimes.

    • #10
    • June 13, 2018 at 6:49 am
    • 9 likes
  11. Member
    Dr. Bastiat Post author

    Phil Turmel (View Comment):

    Your youngest was clearly struggling to hold the frown. In a way, a great compliment to her father.

    Yeah, she kept messing up our picture by breaking out in a giggle fit. It was so cute.

    • #11
    • June 13, 2018 at 6:58 am
    • 5 likes
  12. Member

    Dr. Bastiat (View Comment):

    Ekosj (View Comment):

    Dr. Bastiat: they’re 6’4”, 5’10”, and 6’3”

    To borrow a phrase from the Crocodile Hunter, the late Steve Irwin … “Crikies, that’s a big’n”

    What did you guys do? HGH in the Corn Flakes?

    The Bastiat family must be hell-on-wheels at the block-party volleyball games!

    I’m 6’2″, which is not all that unusual for a man. And my parents aren’t that tall (6’1″ & 5’10”). But my wife is 6’1″, and two of my daughters got their height from her. A 6’4″ woman is equivalent to a 6’11” man, so that’s pretty unusual. Our 6’3″ baby is growing like a weed right now, so we’re not sure how tall she’ll be.

    Our middle child is probably the only 5’10” girl on the planet with a short complex.

    And you’re right. We get noticed. We walk into a restaurant, and everybody stares.

    It’s hard for a girl to be that tall. When asked by a 5’2″ blonde “My God – how tall are you?” my oldest sometimes responds, 5’16”. Dating is difficult. Other girls can be mean sometimes. It’s tough to find cute shoes in a size 14. Luckily, they’re pretty girls. That helps.

    But you can’t hide. It wears on them sometimes.

    It’s difficult on both ends of the extreme. Your girls will be fine. 

    But as to your mixture of pain at the passing of their childhoods and elation at their growing independence, well, it’s the beautiful sorrow of parenthood we all experience. Maedel turns 11 this year and I already get all misty-eyed when I see old pictures of her from the toddler years. 

    • #12
    • June 13, 2018 at 7:08 am
    • 4 likes
  13. Member

    Dr. Bastiat (View Comment):

    Ekosj (View Comment):

    Dr. Bastiat: they’re 6’4”, 5’10”, and 6’3”

    To borrow a phrase from the Crocodile Hunter, the late Steve Irwin … “Crikies, that’s a big’n”

    What did you guys do? HGH in the Corn Flakes?

    The Bastiat family must be hell-on-wheels at the block-party volleyball games!

    I’m 6’2″, which is not all that unusual for a man. And my parents aren’t that tall (6’1″ & 5’10”). But my wife is 6’1″, and two of my daughters got their height from her. A 6’4″ woman is equivalent to a 6’11” man, so that’s pretty unusual. Our 6’3″ baby is growing like a weed right now, so we’re not sure how tall she’ll be.

    Our middle child is probably the only 5’10” girl on the planet with a short complex.

    And you’re right. We get noticed. We walk into a restaurant, and everybody stares.

    It’s hard for a girl to be that tall. When asked by a 5’2″ blonde “My God – how tall are you?” my oldest sometimes responds, 5’16”. Dating is difficult. Other girls can be mean sometimes. It’s tough to find cute shoes in a size 14. Luckily, they’re pretty girls. That helps.

    But you can’t hide. It wears on them sometimes.

    Agreed. One of my daughter’s college roommates was 6’3 or 6’4 and clothes…especially shoes, seemed a never ending struggle.

     

    • #13
    • June 13, 2018 at 7:15 am
    • 3 likes
  14. Member
    Dr. Bastiat Post author

    Dr. Bastiat (View Comment):
    It’s hard for a girl to be that tall.

    Ekosj (View Comment):
    Agreed. One of my daughter’s college roommates was 6’3 or 6’4 and clothes…especially shoes, seemed a never ending struggle.

    We are fortunate that capri’s are in style right now. Because ALL their pants are capri’s.

    • #14
    • June 13, 2018 at 7:20 am
    • 6 likes
  15. Member

    Dr. Bastiat (View Comment):

    Dr. Bastiat (View Comment):
    It’s hard for a girl to be that tall.

    Ekosj (View Comment):
    Agreed. One of my daughter’s college roommates was 6’3 or 6’4 and clothes…especially shoes, seemed a never ending struggle.

    We are fortunate that capri’s are in style right now. Because ALL their pants are capri’s.

    I’m 5′ something under 6″ and my roommate for a couple of years in grad school was 6’10”. We had the same waist size (28) and the same problem finding pants that fit. 28X28 was as hard-to-find as 28X36. 

    • #15
    • June 13, 2018 at 7:37 am
    • 3 likes
  16. Member

    The problem with children is they are programmed to fly the nest. And that is also so very, very good!

    • #16
    • June 13, 2018 at 8:23 am
    • 4 likes
  17. Member

    My mother-in-law used to say, “A son is a son ’til he takes a wife. A daughter’s a daughter the rest of your life.” Of course that’s not universally true, but among my acquaintances, I see that happen often.

    You have a beautiful family.

    • #17
    • June 13, 2018 at 8:34 am
    • 6 likes
  18. Reagan

    Dr B

    I feel your pain…. Christmas morning 1997

    • #18
    • June 13, 2018 at 9:36 am
    • 8 likes
  19. Member
    Dr. Bastiat Post author

    Hartmann von Aue (View Comment):

    Dr. Bastiat (View Comment):

    Dr. Bastiat (View Comment):
    It’s hard for a girl to be that tall.

    Ekosj (View Comment):
    Agreed. One of my daughter’s college roommates was 6’3 or 6’4 and clothes…especially shoes, seemed a never ending struggle.

    We are fortunate that capri’s are in style right now. Because ALL their pants are capri’s.

    I’m 5′ something under 6″ and my roommate for a couple of years in grad school was 6’10”. We had the same waist size (28) and the same problem finding pants that fit. 28X28 was as hard-to-find as 28X36.

    Wow – he must have been all back! My girls are 6-7 inches shorter than him, and their inseam is 37″. And a 28 inch waist. Must have been an odd looking guy.

    • #19
    • June 13, 2018 at 9:38 am
    • 3 likes
  20. Podcaster

    Three girls, eh? Somebody forgot to invite their “Y” chromosomes to the party.

    • #20
    • June 13, 2018 at 9:53 am
    • 1 like
  21. Member

    Dr. Bastiat (View Comment):

    Hartmann von Aue (View Comment):

    Dr. Bastiat (View Comment):

    Dr. Bastiat (View Comment):
    It’s hard for a girl to be that tall.

    Ekosj (View Comment):
    Agreed. One of my daughter’s college roommates was 6’3 or 6’4 and clothes…especially shoes, seemed a never ending struggle.

    We are fortunate that capri’s are in style right now. Because ALL their pants are capri’s.

    I’m 5′ something under 6″ and my roommate for a couple of years in grad school was 6’10”. We had the same waist size (28) and the same problem finding pants that fit. 28X28 was as hard-to-find as 28X36.

    Wow – he must have been all back! My girls are 6-7 inches shorter than him, and their inseam is 37″. And a 28 inch waist. Must have been an odd looking guy.

    He looked well..elongated. He had been recruited as an Olympic high jumper but destroyed a knee playing basketball. Another interesting thing is that his father, also tall and lanky, had a sideline playing Abe Lincoln for public presentations in schools around the states of Indiana and Illinois. 

    • #21
    • June 13, 2018 at 10:49 am
    • 4 likes
  22. Member

    Just a charming post, Dr. B. As the father of two daughters, 51 and 49, I can assure you, they will always be your “little girls.”

    • #22
    • June 13, 2018 at 11:35 am
    • 7 likes
  23. Member

    I too have three daughters and often grow wistful when thinking of them. Today is anniversary number 38, and my Beloved and I look back on the years and see that our yung’uns are our chief source of happiness. And I often think of this:

    SONNET LX

    Like as the waves make towards the pebbled shore,
    So do our minutes hasten to their end;
    Each changing place with that which goes before,
    In sequent toil all forwards do contend.
    Nativity, once in the main of light, 5
    Crawls to maturity, wherewith being crown’d,
    Crooked elipses ‘gainst his glory fight,
    And Time that gave doth now his gift confound.
    Time doth transfix the flourish set on youth
    And delves the parallels in beauty’s brow, 10
    Feeds on the rarities of nature’s truth,
    And nothing stands but for his scythe to mow:
    And yet to times in hope my verse shall stand,
    Praising thy worth, despite his cruel hand.

    • #23
    • June 13, 2018 at 12:27 pm
    • 6 likes
  24. Moderator
    2009
    2012
    2014

     

     

    2016

     

    2018

     

    Eldest is now 17, but shorter than #’s 2 and 3 (who are nearly 14 and 13). Youngest will be 10 in a couple of weeks.

    • #24
    • June 13, 2018 at 1:07 pm
    • 8 likes
  25. Thatcher

    Beautiful girls, and my how they’ve grown! I love “that was then, this is now” photo comparisons of children. Congratulations!

     

    • #25
    • June 13, 2018 at 1:17 pm
    • 5 likes
  26. Moderator

    EJHill (View Comment):

    Three girls, eh? Somebody forgot to invite their “Y” chromosomes to the party.

    I’ve got 4, so something might be in the water?

    I’ve been joking for years that with 4, it’s Little Women, and if we’d had a 5th then it would be Pride and Prejudice.

    • #26
    • June 13, 2018 at 1:28 pm
    • 6 likes
  27. Thatcher

    Ekosj (View Comment):

    Dr. Bastiat: they’re 6’4”, 5’10”, and 6’3”

    To borrow a phrase from the Crocodile Hunter, the late Steve Irwin … “Crikies, that’s a big’n”

    What did you guys do? HGH in the Corn Flakes?

    The Bastiat family must be hell-on-wheels at the block-party volleyball games!

    I want to see video of the family basketball games at the basket in the driveway . . .

    • #27
    • June 13, 2018 at 1:49 pm
    • 3 likes
  28. Member

    I’ve got three girls, too, and I’m sure we have a couch picture like your first one. We’ll have to recreate it when they get together again (ages 24,21, 17 now).

    • #28
    • June 13, 2018 at 2:12 pm
    • 4 likes
  29. Member
    Dr. Bastiat Post author

    Saxonburg (View Comment):

    I’ve got three girls, too, and I’m sure we have a couch picture like your first one. We’ll have to recreate it when they get together again (ages 24,21, 17 now).

    I’d love to see it!

    • #29
    • June 13, 2018 at 2:31 pm
    • 2 likes
  30. Thatcher

    Saxonburg (View Comment):

    I’ve got three girls, too, and I’m sure we have a couch picture like your first one. We’ll have to recreate it when they get together again (ages 24,21, 17 now).

    26, 25, and soon to be 24 here . . .

    I know several folks with three daughters. Granted, we adopted ours, but is there some magical or God-ordained decree that three girls are “Da Bomb”? We know a bunch of folks with X-enhanced chromosome offspring, but that doesn’t explain the “three” part . . .

    • #30
    • June 13, 2018 at 2:36 pm
    • 4 likes
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