The deep, deep-blue state of Oregon was settled by heroic pioneers who crossed the vast interior of the country in primitive wagons facing deprivation, harsh weather, and violent attacks from indigenous peoples. Their descendants now panic at the thought of pumping their own gasoline.
Oregon is one of two states where self-service gas stations have been illegal (New Jersey is the other). Motorists are not allowed to pump their own gas because the act of putting gasoline into an automobile is one of those highly technical, very tricky tasks that requires a highly trained professional fuel handler to perform, according to their elected officials. (I’m surprised they don’t require their pump jockeys to finish a two-year degree and an extensive certification process.) However, Oregon recently passed a law allowing some gas stations in the hick parts of the state to offer self-service.
Hilarity, in the form of Facebook comments from panicked liberals, ensued:
I don’t even know HOW to pump gas and I am 62, native Oregonian…..I say NO THANKS! I don’t want to smell like gasoline!
I’ve lived in this state all my life and I REFUSE to pump my own gas. I had to do it once in California while visiting my brother and almost died doing it. This a service only qualified people should perform. I will literally park at the pump and wait until someone pumps my gas. I can’t even.
Not a good idea, there are lots of reason to have an attendant helping, one is they need a job too. Many people are not capable of knowing how to pump gas and the hazards of not doing it correctly. Besides I don’t want to go to work smelling of gas when I get it on my hands or clothes. I agree Very bad idea.…
Yuck! Pumping my on fuel in freezing temperatures and handling a nasty ole fuel nozzle that 50 other people have touched that day (and who knows what cooties are on there), no thank you. It’s nice to not have to pump your own fuel.
No! Disabled, seniors, people with young children in the car need help. Not to mention getting out of your car with transients around and not feeling safe too. This is a very bad idea. Grrr