Recommended by Ricochet Members Created with Sketch. The Inventions That Weren’t

Arahant
By Arahant
Arahant Member
Corporate governance, process management and change management consultant, poet, alchemist, and writer.
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53 COMMENTS
 

Many years ago in my hometown, I was talking with my barber, Chet. Chet was a talented guy. He could talk and cut hair well at the same time. When I was young, my father took me to another barber, Leroy. Leroy was also a politician and ran a banquet hall. He was a good barber, so long as he didn’t try to talk, too. But, if a call came in or if the customer got Leroy talking, why, anything could happen to one’s hair. And being a state representative, Leroy got a lot of phone calls. So, when I got old enough to drive and have my own money, I went to Chet rather than Leroy when I needed a haircut. It was safe to have a conversation with Chet.

I was maybe 20, and Chet was at least a generation older. His niece had gone to my high school and graduated a year or three before me. And trust me, she was pretty and sweet. Chet had a picture of her on the shelf of his salon stall. That picture was something to look at while I was there, certainly better than looking at her Uncle Chet: male, gray, and balding.

Chet, vaguely making a circle in the air with an upraised palm, asked, “You know those things you see on trucks these days? The shields up above the cabs that make them more aerodynamic?”

“Sure, Chet. I know what you’re talking about.”

“I thought of those years ago, long before they started appearing. But I never acted on the idea. I knew that the big, flat face of the trailer had to have a lot of drag. I thought of the way to fix it, but I never did anything with it. I could have made a lot of money with that idea. I bet the guy who actually followed up on it did.”

“Probably did, Chet,” I agreed.

“Good ideas don’t come along often. They may be a once in a lifetime thing for most people.” He pointed at me in the mirror, “If you ever get one, act on it.”

I thought about Chet and that conversation about 10 years later. I identified a problem and came up with a solution. Rather than just end it there, I decided to pursue the idea. Now, this is a somewhat delicate subject. You see, there are issues that men must face due to urinal design. Most men’s rooms have at least one urinal set lower to comply with the ADA. The thing is that urinals are designed to be somewhat like a parabolic mirror or dish. In a parabolic dish or mirror, light or radio waves coming in relatively straight are bounced and focused towards a desired spot. Urinals, however, are neither perfectly parabolic nor is it desirable for the focal point to be about where a satellite dish’s focal point would be, since that would be deflecting the stream back outward from the urinal. There seems to be a sort of sweet spot with the urinal. If you hit it in that spot and at the right angle, most of the stream is deflected down into the bowl to drain out. On the other hand, hitting the wrong spot or at a bad angle can cause spattering that comes back at the urinal user or is deflected back out onto his clothing.

Did I mention ADA compliance? At that time, I was working in a building where the men’s rooms had two urinals each. One was set much lower. The other at the height an average man would need. Inevitably, when I came into the lavatory, one of two situations would apply. I’m a gent of average height. I would either come into the room and some shrimp would be at the normal-height urinal, so I would wind up at the ADA urinal, or I would come into the room and use the normal height urinal only to have some guy six inches taller walk in and be relegated to ADA-ville.

Now, the Germans have, I have more recently heard, come up with a solution, which is having signs that say, “You vill sitz to urinate. Ve haf vays of making you sit. Ve are vatching you!” But that’s definitely not an American-style solution. For one thing, not nearly enough technology is involved. My own revelation back in the mid-1990s was that urinals should be adjustable.

Rails to slide up and down on, making every urinal ADA compliant, and allowing even tall men that perfect height; a handle and locking mechanism; adjustable tubing to hook into the wall. So, I drew up the idea in MS Paint, probably the only graphics package I had at the time. (Do you like the pixelated text?) Then I printed it out and took my picture to Joe and George, who managed the building for the company, figuring they might have some insights.

They looked at it and Joe said, “Looks like it would make urinals more expensive. You have more parts with the rails and then flexible tubing. Flexible tubing will have more wear and tear, so more maintenance. The contractors who build these buildings want cheap and reliable. They don’t care if you get spattered at the urinal set at ADA height. For one thing, you aren’t paying for the building.”

“True of office buildings, I guess, but what about restaurants and other places that tend to go with more upscale fixtures?”

“You could try it,” George shrugged, “but it will be a fairly small market, especially with the maintenance issue.”

Joe shook his head, “There is already a better solution if they have the money. That’s the type of urinals that go from chest height down to the floor. The problem is, they use more porcelain, so cost more money. And they don’t cost much more money, probably less than yours would. How often do you see those these days?”

“Ah,” I said as I nodded.

I have been blessed to come up with many more ideas. The next one is still in process, so I shall not reveal it. More than likely, it will make me a few dollars, but not nearly making back what I have put into it.

In around 2006, I was back serving the manufacturing world, specifically automobiles. I had this notion pop into my head, what if horns were easily programmable? What if it were easy to change from the standard one-note samba to a few notes from any tune at all. Maybe there would be a slot for a flash drive where one could have midi files that one could upload or even rotate between. The General Lee had Dixie. What would everyone else have for their cars if they had the chance?

Now, I had a friend, Phil, at this car company who had a few patents, so I sent a note over to him about what it would take and who might be interested. But then, its being 2006, I started searching on the Internet for various terms. I found something. It was not exactly what I had envisioned but close enough.

Note to Phil: Scratch that. Too late.

That is my great idea score, thus far: too expensive, working on it, and beaten to the punch.

What ideas have you come up with that were inadequate to the market or too late, my friends?

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  1. Boss Mongo Member
    Boss Mongo

    Randy Webster (View Comment):
    I gained a certain amount of insight into the human condition when I was told by restaurant owners that people stole them.

    So, your idea is a booby-trapped pee propeller?

    • #31
    • November 3, 2017, at 7:56 PM PDT
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  2. Profile Photo Member

    Arahant (View Comment):

    Whistle Pig (View Comment):
    Nice try. Like I’m gonna just give my ideas away.

    We know better. You never had any. That’s why you became a lawyer.

    Not quite – that’s why I’m still a lawyer.

    • #32
    • November 3, 2017, at 8:11 PM PDT
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  3. Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw Member
    Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw

    Boss Mongo (View Comment):

    Randy Webster (View Comment):
    I gained a certain amount of insight into the human condition when I was told by restaurant owners that people stole them.

    So, your idea is a booby-trapped pee propeller?

    I’ll take “phrases I never expected to hear” for $600.

    • #33
    • November 3, 2017, at 8:17 PM PDT
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  4. DocJay Inactive
    DocJay

    I make 11 foot pokes for the people who won’t touch me w a tenner. They sell well

    • #34
    • November 3, 2017, at 8:23 PM PDT
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  5. Randy Webster Member
    Randy Webster

    Matt Balzer (View Comment):

    Boss Mongo (View Comment):

    Randy Webster (View Comment):
    I gained a certain amount of insight into the human condition when I was told by restaurant owners that people stole them.

    So, your idea is a booby-trapped pee propeller?

    I’ll take “phrases I never expected to hear” for $600.

    I’m not quite sure why, but this combination kept me in stitches for a couple of minutes.

    • #35
    • November 3, 2017, at 8:31 PM PDT
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  6. John Walker Contributor
    John Walker

    Arahant: What ideas have you come up with that were inadequate to the market or too late, my friends?

    After the Falklands/Malvinas conflict and all of the conflicting information coming from both sides, I came up with the idea to start a global radio network, syndicated via satellite, called “All News, Worldwide”. We would have correspondents on every side of every major conflict and go right down the middle. We would largely rely upon local reporters from news organisations on the scene acting as stringers to our network, and filter them with a small editorial team at headquarters to achieve balance.

    A few people I pitched this to thought it might work. All of the others thought I was crazy. “Who would follow news 24 hours a day?”

    This is CNN.

    I never thought of the communist propaganda angle.

    • #36
    • November 3, 2017, at 8:44 PM PDT
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  7. HankRhody Freelance Philosopher Contributor
    HankRhody Freelance Philosopher

    John Walker (View Comment):
    I never thought of the communist propaganda angle.

    It’s pretty hard to think of everything.

    • #37
    • November 3, 2017, at 8:50 PM PDT
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  8. Clavius Thatcher
    Clavius

    John Walker (View Comment):

    Arahant: What ideas have you come up with that were inadequate to the market or too late, my friends?

    After the Falklands/Malvinas conflict and all of the conflicting information coming from both sides, I came up with the idea to start a global radio network, syndicated via satellite, called “All News, Worldwide”. We would have correspondents on every side of every major conflict and go right down the middle. We would largely rely upon local reporters from news organisations on the scene acting as stringers to our network, and filter them with a small editorial team at headquarters to achieve balance.

    A few people I pitched this to thought it might work. All of the others thought I was crazy. “Who would watch news 24 hours a day.”

    This is CNN.

    I never thought of the communist propaganda angle.

    Gramscian damage.

    • #38
    • November 3, 2017, at 8:51 PM PDT
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  9. namlliT noD Member
    namlliT noDJoined in the first year of Ricochet Ricochet Charter Member

    I’ve collected 23 startup ideas into an article:

    Don Tillman: 23 Startup Company Ideas

    • #39
    • November 4, 2017, at 1:29 AM PDT
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  10. Arahant Member
    Arahant
    Post author

    Don Tillman (View Comment):
    I’ve collected 23 startup ideas into an article:

    Don Tillman: 23 Startup Company Ideas

    That reminds me of a few more things I have done in the past:

    http://www.charleslweatherford.com/content/growroad.shtml

    http://www.charleslweatherford.com/content/car.shtml

    • #40
    • November 4, 2017, at 1:53 AM PDT
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  11. Trink Coolidge
    TrinkJoined in the first year of Ricochet Ricochet Charter Member

    Dug this out of my ancient “Project” file. It’s at least 20 years old. Seems appropriate to this post :) (Never realized that I see my husband in it :(

    • #41
    • November 4, 2017, at 9:15 AM PDT
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  12. cirby Member
    cirby

    Self-locking cotter pins.

    I had an idea for this about 40 years ago, and dropped it when I found out that someone already made one of a different design. A couple of companies make a version now that’s basically identical to the one I came up with back then.

    • #42
    • November 4, 2017, at 9:23 AM PDT
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  13. Larry Koler Inactive
    Larry Koler

    Google “Urinals of McMenamins” and you can see a bunch of these that have been rescued from obscurity by the glorious McMenamin brothers.

    Full length, fully ADA compliant and nice to look at. Also, less mess overall and easier to clean.

    The McMenamin brothers (Brian and Mike) are Portland Oregon geniuses who make the best restaurants and hotels and wineries and you name it. I have been meaning to do a post about them for some time. I met them last year. I wonder if one of you Oregon people know more about them.

    • #43
    • November 4, 2017, at 11:23 AM PDT
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  14. Larry Koler Inactive
    Larry Koler

    Another build out success from the McMenamins. And they all work!

    • #44
    • November 4, 2017, at 11:31 AM PDT
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  15. Randy Webster Member
    Randy Webster

    Larry Koler (View Comment):
    Another build out success from the McMenamins. And they all work!

    Does the water in them run constantly?

    • #45
    • November 4, 2017, at 11:33 AM PDT
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  16. Arahant Member
    Arahant
    Post author

    Randy Webster (View Comment):
    Does the water in them run constantly?

    More likely to just flush every so often all at once or be built as flushless.

    • #46
    • November 4, 2017, at 11:42 AM PDT
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  17. Scott Donohue Member
    Scott Donohue

    Ok, back to urinals.

    The Old Town Bar on 18th Street in New York had a 100th birthday party for their Hinsdale Urinals.

    http://www.oldtownbar.com/100Years.html

    • #47
    • November 4, 2017, at 1:29 PM PDT
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  18. Arahant Member
    Arahant
    Post author

    Scott Donohue (View Comment):
    Ok, back to urinals.

    The Old Town Bar on 18th Street in New York had a 100th birthday party for their Hinsdale Urinals.

    http://www.oldtownbar.com/100Years.html

    Okay. I don’t think that I would go quite so far, but whatever. Looks like it attracted a crowd.

    • #48
    • November 4, 2017, at 1:39 PM PDT
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  19. Larry Koler Inactive
    Larry Koler

    Randy Webster (View Comment):

    Larry Koler (View Comment):
    Another build out success from the McMenamins. And they all work!

    Does the water in them run constantly?

    Now that is an interesting question. Originally, they might have but I bet the McMenamins put in a timed flush on a regular few minutes or so.

    • #49
    • November 4, 2017, at 6:29 PM PDT
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  20. Keith SF Member
    Keith SFJoined in the first year of Ricochet Ricochet Charter Member

    Those old floor-length urinals just work so much better.

    A few years back I was at Claridge’s Bar in London; I was impressed that the bathroom urinals had angled glass guards, as a precaution to make sure your shoes stayed pristine. Truly, it’s the Maybach of public lavatories:

    (BTW, this pic came from google image search. Rest assured, I’m not the kind of person to take out my camera in a public restroom:-)

    • #50
    • November 4, 2017, at 9:57 PM PDT
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  21. Clavius Thatcher
    Clavius

    Keith SF (View Comment):
    Those old floor-length urinals just work so much better.

    A few years back I was at Claridge’s Bar in London; I was impressed that the bathroom urinals had angled glass guards, as a precaution to make sure your shoes stayed pristine. Truly, it’s the Maybach of public lavatories:

    (BTW, this pic came from google image search. Rest assured, I’m not the kind of person to take out my camera in a public restroom:-)

    I am not so circumspect

    • #51
    • November 4, 2017, at 10:09 PM PDT
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  22. Keith SF Member
    Keith SFJoined in the first year of Ricochet Ricochet Charter Member

    Clavius (View Comment):
    I am not so circumspect

    Ha! Now I have to know where that bathroom is.

    I’ll admit, I was momentarily tempted to take out my camera, but I wasn’t the only man in there at the time. I didn’t need anyone calling hotel security on me.

    • #52
    • November 4, 2017, at 10:34 PM PDT
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  23. Clavius Thatcher
    Clavius

    Keith SF (View Comment):

    Clavius (View Comment):
    I am not so circumspect

    Ha! Now I have to know where that bathroom is.

    I’ll admit, I was momentarily tempted to take out my camera, but I wasn’t the only man in there at the time. I didn’t need anyone calling hotel security on me.

    That bathroom is at the Della Resort in Lonavla, Maharashtra, India. Here is a Google Maps link.

    • #53
    • November 4, 2017, at 10:40 PM PDT
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