Recommended by Ricochet Members Created with Sketch. The Inventions That Weren’t

 

Many years ago in my hometown, I was talking with my barber, Chet. Chet was a talented guy. He could talk and cut hair well at the same time. When I was young, my father took me to another barber, Leroy. Leroy was also a politician and ran a banquet hall. He was a good barber, so long as he didn’t try to talk, too. But, if a call came in or if the customer got Leroy talking, why, anything could happen to one’s hair. And being a state representative, Leroy got a lot of phone calls. So, when I got old enough to drive and have my own money, I went to Chet rather than Leroy when I needed a haircut. It was safe to have a conversation with Chet.

I was maybe 20, and Chet was at least a generation older. His niece had gone to my high school and graduated a year or three before me. And trust me, she was pretty and sweet. Chet had a picture of her on the shelf of his salon stall. That picture was something to look at while I was there, certainly better than looking at her Uncle Chet: male, gray, and balding.

Chet, vaguely making a circle in the air with an upraised palm, asked, “You know those things you see on trucks these days? The shields up above the cabs that make them more aerodynamic?”

“Sure, Chet. I know what you’re talking about.”

“I thought of those years ago, long before they started appearing. But I never acted on the idea. I knew that the big, flat face of the trailer had to have a lot of drag. I thought of the way to fix it, but I never did anything with it. I could have made a lot of money with that idea. I bet the guy who actually followed up on it did.”

“Probably did, Chet,” I agreed.

“Good ideas don’t come along often. They may be a once in a lifetime thing for most people.” He pointed at me in the mirror, “If you ever get one, act on it.”


I thought about Chet and that conversation about 10 years later. I identified a problem and came up with a solution. Rather than just end it there, I decided to pursue the idea. Now, this is a somewhat delicate subject. You see, there are issues that men must face due to urinal design. Most men’s rooms have at least one urinal set lower to comply with the ADA. The thing is that urinals are designed to be somewhat like a parabolic mirror or dish. In a parabolic dish or mirror, light or radio waves coming in relatively straight are bounced and focused towards a desired spot. Urinals, however, are neither perfectly parabolic nor is it desirable for the focal point to be about where a satellite dish’s focal point would be, since that would be deflecting the stream back outward from the urinal. There seems to be a sort of sweet spot with the urinal. If you hit it in that spot and at the right angle, most of the stream is deflected down into the bowl to drain out. On the other hand, hitting the wrong spot or at a bad angle can cause spattering that comes back at the urinal user or is deflected back out onto his clothing.

Did I mention ADA compliance? At that time, I was working in a building where the men’s rooms had two urinals each. One was set much lower. The other at the height an average man would need. Inevitably, when I came into the lavatory, one of two situations would apply. I’m a gent of average height. I would either come into the room and some shrimp would be at the normal-height urinal, so I would wind up at the ADA urinal, or I would come into the room and use the normal height urinal only to have some guy six inches taller walk in and be relegated to ADA-ville.

Now, the Germans have, I have more recently heard, come up with a solution, which is having signs that say, “You vill sitz to urinate. Ve haf vays of making you sit. Ve are vatching you!” But that’s definitely not an American-style solution. For one thing, not nearly enough technology is involved. My own revelation back in the mid-1990s was that urinals should be adjustable.

Rails to slide up and down on, making every urinal ADA compliant, and allowing even tall men that perfect height; a handle and locking mechanism; adjustable tubing to hook into the wall. So, I drew up the idea in MS Paint, probably the only graphics package I had at the time. (Do you like the pixelated text?) Then I printed it out and took my picture to Joe and George, who managed the building for the company, figuring they might have some insights.

They looked at it and Joe said, “Looks like it would make urinals more expensive. You have more parts with the rails and then flexible tubing. Flexible tubing will have more wear and tear, so more maintenance. The contractors who build these buildings want cheap and reliable. They don’t care if you get spattered at the urinal set at ADA height. For one thing, you aren’t paying for the building.”

“True of office buildings, I guess, but what about restaurants and other places that tend to go with more upscale fixtures?”

“You could try it,” George shrugged, “but it will be a fairly small market, especially with the maintenance issue.”

Joe shook his head, “There is already a better solution if they have the money. That’s the type of urinals that go from chest height down to the floor. The problem is, they use more porcelain, so cost more money. And they don’t cost much more money, probably less than yours would. How often do you see those these days?”

“Ah,” I said as I nodded.


I have been blessed to come up with many more ideas. The next one is still in process, so I shall not reveal it. More than likely, it will make me a few dollars, but not nearly making back what I have put into it.


In around 2006, I was back serving the manufacturing world, specifically automobiles. I had this notion pop into my head, what if horns were easily programmable? What if it were easy to change from the standard one-note samba to a few notes from any tune at all. Maybe there would be a slot for a flash drive where one could have midi files that one could upload or even rotate between. The General Lee had Dixie. What would everyone else have for their cars if they had the chance?

Now, I had a friend, Phil, at this car company who had a few patents, so I sent a note over to him about what it would take and who might be interested. But then, its being 2006, I started searching on the Internet for various terms. I found something. It was not exactly what I had envisioned but close enough.

Note to Phil: Scratch that. Too late.


That is my great idea score, thus far: too expensive, working on it, and beaten to the punch.

What ideas have you come up with that were inadequate to the market or too late, my friends?

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  1. Judge Mental Member

    After listening to my boss complain one night about all of the things he had to keep track of, I invented a Personal Information Manager, which is basically the software they have on every phone, like an address book, and memo pad, task list and so on. All integrated together with an object-oriented data design, before object orientation had really hit the scene.

    I started working on it, figured a six month time frame. Three months in, Lotus released Agenda, which did most of the same stuff. And they were the biggest software company in the world, so tough to compete, even though mine was cooler than theirs.

    • #1
    • November 3, 2017, at 3:57 PM PDT
    • 17 likes
  2. Matt Bartle Member
    Matt Bartle Joined in the first year of Ricochet Ricochet Charter Member

    I thought of MTV when I was, I don’t know, 6 or 7?

    The family was watching some variety show on TV, and some group was performing a song. I remember thinking that this is like radio, but on the TV. If we have radio stations playing music all day, why not a TV station that plays this kind of thing all day?

    Then I thought, Nah! Who’s going to sit and watch people playing music all day? Besides, there’s only 4 channels.

    There was really nowhere for me to go with this idea at the time, anyway. At 6, I had no contacts in the entertainment industry. Actually, I still don’t.

    • #2
    • November 3, 2017, at 4:00 PM PDT
    • 10 likes
  3. Arahant Member
    Arahant

    Judge Mental (View Comment):
    And they were the biggest software company in the world, so tough to compete, even though mine was cooler than theirs.

    Yep. I feel for you. At least I didn’t put more than an hour into the programmable horn idea.

    • #3
    • November 3, 2017, at 4:01 PM PDT
    • 3 likes
  4. Arahant Member
    Arahant

    Matt Bartle (View Comment):
    I thought of MTV when I was, I don’t know, 6 or 7?

    You could have been rich and famous by now. Of course, you probably would have wound up a Progressive there in the entertainment industry.

    • #4
    • November 3, 2017, at 4:04 PM PDT
    • 3 likes
  5. Profile Photo Member

    Nice try. Like I’m gonna just give my ideas away.

    • #5
    • November 3, 2017, at 4:05 PM PDT
    • 13 likes
  6. Arahant Member
    Arahant

    Whistle Pig (View Comment):
    Nice try. Like I’m gonna just give my ideas away.

    We know better. You never had any. That’s why you became a lawyer.

    • #6
    • November 3, 2017, at 4:07 PM PDT
    • 5 likes
  7. Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw Member

    Arahant: Most men’s rooms have at least one urinal set lower to comply with the ADA.

    Well, I learned something today. I always thought those were situated lower for kids.

    • #7
    • November 3, 2017, at 4:11 PM PDT
    • 9 likes
  8. Randy Webster Member

    Matt Balzer (View Comment):

    Arahant: Most men’s rooms have at least one urinal set lower to comply with the ADA.

    Well, I learned something today. I always thought those were situated lower for kids.

    I always thought it was for the well-endowed.

    • #8
    • November 3, 2017, at 4:21 PM PDT
    • 6 likes
  9. Randy Webster Member

    What about pee whirlies?

    • #9
    • November 3, 2017, at 4:22 PM PDT
    • 2 likes
  10. Arahant Member
    Arahant

    Randy Webster (View Comment):
    What about pee whirlies?

    Uh…?

    • #10
    • November 3, 2017, at 4:32 PM PDT
    • 1 like
  11. Randy Webster Member

    Arahant: Joe shook his head, “There is already a better solution, if they have the money. That’s the type of urinals that go from chest height down to the floor. The problem is, they use more porcelain, so cost more money. And they don’t cost much more money, probably less than yours would. How often do you see those these days?”

    I built a restaurant with exactly that kind of urinal in, I think, Greenville, NC.

    • #11
    • November 3, 2017, at 4:34 PM PDT
    • 2 likes
  12. Arahant Member
    Arahant

    Randy Webster (View Comment):
    I built a restaurant with exactly that kind of urinal in, I think, Greenville, NC.

    Yep. One sees them occasionally in newer buildings, much more in older.

    • #12
    • November 3, 2017, at 4:37 PM PDT
    • 1 like
  13. Percival Thatcher
    Percival Joined in the first year of Ricochet Ricochet Charter Member

    Randy Webster (View Comment):
    What about pee whirlies?

    There you go. That’s your ticket to ride!

    Or whizz. Whatever.

    • #13
    • November 3, 2017, at 4:37 PM PDT
    • 2 likes
  14. Randy Webster Member

    Arahant (View Comment):

    Randy Webster (View Comment):
    I built a restaurant with exactly that kind of urinal in, I think, Greenville, NC.

    Yep. One sees them occasionally in newer buildings, much more in older.

    This was probably in the early 90’s. They’re very expensive.

    • #14
    • November 3, 2017, at 4:38 PM PDT
    • 3 likes
  15. Matt Bartle Member
    Matt Bartle Joined in the first year of Ricochet Ricochet Charter Member

    Randy Webster (View Comment):

    Matt Balzer (View Comment):

    Arahant: Most men’s rooms have at least one urinal set lower to comply with the ADA.

    Well, I learned something today. I always thought those were situated lower for kids.

    I always thought it was for the well-endowed.

    I was at a urinal where I work and one of the partners was at the next one. He muttered, “Boy, this water’s cold. <pause> Deep, too.”

    I learned that he likes this joke so much he told it all the time!

    • #15
    • November 3, 2017, at 4:41 PM PDT
    • 4 likes
  16. PHCheese Member

    I always thought the lower units were for the well endowed so as not to get it wet.

    • #16
    • November 3, 2017, at 4:42 PM PDT
    • 1 like
  17. Vectorman Member

    Arahant: Joe shook his head, “There is already a better solution, if they have the money. That’s the type of urinals that go from chest height down to the floor. The problem is, they use more porcelain, so cost more money.

    I’ve seen janitors clean that type of urinal using a mop and bucket. Whether they used the same mop on the floor, I couldn’t recall…

    • #17
    • November 3, 2017, at 5:15 PM PDT
    • 3 likes
  18. Arahant Member
    Arahant

    Matt Bartle (View Comment):
    I was at a urinal where I work and one of the partners was at the next one. He muttered, “Boy, this water’s cold. <pause> Deep, too.”

    I learned that he likes this joke so much he told it all the time!

    The way I heard that one was two guys urinating off The Golden Gate Bridge.

    • #18
    • November 3, 2017, at 5:25 PM PDT
    • 2 likes
  19. Clavius Thatcher

    Arahant (View Comment):

    Randy Webster (View Comment):
    What about pee whirlies?

    Uh…?

    It is the mark at the back of the urinal usually about 6 inches above the bottom. Sometimes it is a bee. It is the sweet spot. If you hit that, you don’t splash, no matter the height of the urinal.

    • #19
    • November 3, 2017, at 5:27 PM PDT
    • 2 likes
  20. Clavius Thatcher

    In college a friend of mine and I had the idea of a hand held scanner that would let you take notes while highlighting the text in a text book. It being the early 80s at the time, OCR was not good, not possible in a small device, and we just were talking about a cool idea.

    They exist now: https://www.amazon.com/Scanmarker-Air-Pen-Scanner-Highlighter/dp/B01N07J2AE

    • #20
    • November 3, 2017, at 5:31 PM PDT
    • 4 likes
  21. Arahant Member
    Arahant

    Clavius (View Comment):
    It is the mark at the back of the urinal usually about 6 inches above the bottom. Sometimes it is a bee. It is the sweet spot. If you hit that, you don’t splash, no matter the height of the urinal.

    Ah, I had never heard the name. It’s also true that not all of them have that. (Yes, I have seen some.) Or sometimes they are covered by the mats with the deodorizer cake. Also, not all brands are that well engineered.

    • #21
    • November 3, 2017, at 5:34 PM PDT
    • 2 likes
  22. Boss Mongo Member

    Arahant: There seems to be a sort of sweet spot with the urinal.

    Yes! and if you hit that sweet spot, and then chow down on that puck-sized round breath mint so thoughtfully left there? Aahhhh. Not bad.

    • #22
    • November 3, 2017, at 5:34 PM PDT
    • 7 likes
  23. Arahant Member
    Arahant

    Boss Mongo (View Comment):
    Yes! and if you hit that sweet spot, and then chow down on that puck-sized round breath mint so thoughtfully left there? Aahhhh. Not bad.

    Yeah, that’s the ticket.

    • #23
    • November 3, 2017, at 5:38 PM PDT
    • 2 likes
  24. John A Peabody Inactive
    John A Peabody Joined in the first year of Ricochet Ricochet Charter Member

    Uber. About eight years ago, my son and I starting musing about a ride-offering service where you use you own car. In ten minutes, we had thought about 80% of what’s in the Uber app today. But even then, I figured that if it was easy for us to figure out, someone had already had it in the works. Thomas Edison was right: Genius is 95% perspiration, i.e., it’s not the idea, it’s how you work it.

    On another note– getting splashed from a urinal? That has never, ever, ever happened to me.

    • #24
    • November 3, 2017, at 6:05 PM PDT
    • 4 likes
  25. MarciN Member

    One Christmas years ago I gave each of my kids the first edition of this book (the first edition): The Mom Inventors Handbook: How to Turn That Great Idea into the Next Big Thing, second edition (McGraw-Hill Education, New York).

    I wanted my kids to have it in case they thought of something that would sell well and provide for them financially while they went off to do things they really wanted to do. :) Their inventions could support them.

    Don’t hesitate to pursue some of your ideas. You may not make a fortune, but you might get a nice vacation out of one of them.

    My sister, thought to be just plain maladjusted because she has always been (and still is) in her own little world, once took her suitcase and attached wheels and a handle to it. There’s not a time I go through an airport that I don’t think of the fortune she could have made. :) One time she took a guy’s t-shirt and refashioned the neck to make a softer, more feminine neckline–just before LL Bean and Land’s End came out with women’s soft t-shirts. Another time she drove my aunt and uncle crazy by building modular furniture in their garage. In her mind’s eye, she could see the usefulness of this type of furniture for a generation of people constantly on the move. See the Ikea line of modular portable furniture, which became popular ten years later.

    We are all geniuses. We just don’t know what to do with our ideas.

    The most impressive business book I have ever read was by Lowell Bryan and Claudia Joyce called Mobilizing Minds. It’s all about how to capture and develop good ideas. It’s for businesses, but individuals could use the same methods for their personal ideas.

    At the very least, please write them down somewhere. Don’t let them evaporate from your mind. Keep them somewhere.

    • #25
    • November 3, 2017, at 6:54 PM PDT
    • 8 likes
  26. Arahant Member
    Arahant

    MarciN (View Comment):
    We are all geniuses.

    Yep.

    MarciN (View Comment):
    At the very least, please write them down somewhere. Don’t let them evaporate from your mind. Keep them somewhere.

    Very good idea.

    • #26
    • November 3, 2017, at 6:59 PM PDT
    • 4 likes
  27. :thinking: no superfluity of n… Member
    :thinking: no superfluity of n… Joined in the first year of Ricochet Ricochet Charter Member

    I had a good idea once. Then I forgot.

    But I really wish one of our programmers would invent a way so clicking on an employee to check their time would allow a pop-up or another tab, so I wouldn’t have to re-load the database every time I want to check someone’s hours. Sure would be nice.

    • #27
    • November 3, 2017, at 7:33 PM PDT
    • 3 likes
  28. Midget Faded Rattlesnake Contributor

    A window screen that lets in fresh air, but with too fine a mesh to let in pollen. Then I found out they already make them in Japan.

    There are many others. That one’s particularly memorable, for some reason.

    • #28
    • November 3, 2017, at 7:35 PM PDT
    • 5 likes
  29. Vectorman Member

    John Peabody (View Comment):
    But even then, I figured that if it was easy for us to figure out, someone had already had it in the works. Thomas Edison right: Genius is 95% perspiration, i.e., it’s not the idea, it’s how you work it

    You’d be surprised that even if it seems obvious (after the fact) to you, it isn’t to others.* After researching many papers on radio synthesizer design, I had a simple idea that eliminated custom tuning in radios. Unfortunately, the company wasn’t able to finish the development and didn’t pursue the obvious patent.

    *shameless plug – I’ll reveal this on November 8th Group Writing

    • #29
    • November 3, 2017, at 7:46 PM PDT
    • 4 likes
  30. Randy Webster Member

    Clavius (View Comment):

    Arahant (View Comment):

    Randy Webster (View Comment):
    What about pee whirlies?

    Uh…?

    It is the mark at the back of the urinal usually about 6 inches above the bottom. Sometimes it is a bee. It is the sweet spot. If you hit that, you don’t splash, no matter the height of the urinal.

    Actually, what I had in mind was a device with a propeller that spun when peed on. I gained a certain amount of insight into the human condition when I was told by restaurant owners that people stole them.

    • #30
    • November 3, 2017, at 7:54 PM PDT
    • 6 likes

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