In Praise of Guy Fieri

 

Guy Fieri is the tacky self-promoter famous for touring “Diners, Drive-ins and Dives” nationwide in his red ’68 Camaro. If you’ve ever clicked by the Food Network, Fieri has probably been stuffing greasy food into his goateed maw between bro jokes with the restaurant staff.

Everyone loves to hate Fieri — except the public. “Triple D” and his other shows have been a ratings juggernaut for a decade. The media’s latest attack on the affable boor involves the signature sauce he uses at all his restaurants. From Eater:

Along with wearing backward sunglasses and driving a red muscle car across America, Guy Fieri is famous for creating a mysterious substance known as Donkey Sauce. This tangy ooze flows freely throughout his Times Square culinary funhouse, and it can also be found smothering hamburger patties at his casino establishments and cruise ship restaurants around the world.

…Fieri finally addresses the make-up of his famous Donkey Sauce:

“If we called it aioli, does that make it sexier? It’s aioli. This goes back to that exact comment that I said in the beginning: it’s about moderation. I called it Donkey Sauce because you have to make fun of it. It’s a quintessential ingredient in so many aspects of food, yet probably not the most beneficial except for flavor, probably the least beneficial, but it does have its place. All food has its place.”

I hate to break it to Eater, but secret sauce is just ketchup and mustard, fortune cookies aren’t Chinese, and Outback Steakhouse was created in a Tampa boardroom. It’s called marketing, people.

Now, when I say the media hates Guy Fieri, I mean they hate Guy Fieri. To the coastal gourmand, the chef/host might be more loathed than Donald Trump. They’re probably poring through his tax returns looking for borscht-stained checks from Putin. The most infamous takedown was by Pete Wells of the New York Times who was appalled at the very concept of Donkey Sauce:

Did panic grip your soul as you stared into the whirling hypno wheel of the menu, where adjectives and nouns spin in a crazy vortex? When you saw the burger described as “Guy’s Pat LaFrieda custom blend, all-natural Creekstone Farm Black Angus beef patty, LTOP (lettuce, tomato, onion + pickle), SMC (super-melty-cheese) and a slathering of Donkey Sauce on garlic-buttered brioche,” did your mind touch the void for a minute?

…What accounts for the vast difference between the Donkey Sauce recipe you’ve published and the Donkey Sauce in your restaurant? Why has the hearty, rustic appeal of roasted-garlic mayonnaise been replaced by something that tastes like Miracle Whip with minced raw garlic?

And when we hear the words Donkey Sauce, which part of the donkey are we supposed to think about?

I can pretentious-foodie with the best of them (you should hear me go on about single-origin pour-over coffee), but I can’t help but admire Fieri.

Starting out as Guy Ferry, he got a job slinging hash at the Red Lion Inn in Eureka, CA. After knocking out a hospitality degree from University of Nevada, Las Vegas, he promptly changed his name to Fieri. (He says it was to honor his immigrant forbear, Giuseppe Fieri, but it didn’t hurt that it sounded cooler.)

In 1996, he took his new name and opened Johnny Garlic’s, a crowd-pleasing restaurant just off the 101 in Santa Rosa, CA. After a decade, he took his chances and ended up winning “The Next Food Network Star.” The rest is basic-cable history.

“Guy’s Big Bite,” “Guy Off the Hook,” “Guy’s Grocery Games,” and of course “Triple D” made Fieri the network’s most ubiquitous personality. He even hosted a short-lived prime-time game show on NBC.

He’s released six books, his own line of foods, and now presides over an international restaurant empire. But how on earth did this unsophisticated, gravy-swilling UNLV hospitality grad run laps around the most acclaimed chefs of our generation? By taking risks and busting his ass.

Yes, Donkey Sauce is just a silly name for aioli. Yes, he wears pinky rings and his goatee looks ridiculous. Yes, the staff at his El Burro Borracho in Laughlin, NV, isn’t waiting for that third Michelin star. But through hard work, Guy Fieri transformed himself from a short-order cook in the sticks into a one-man industry that has boosted the fortunes of countless mom-and-pop diners, hired countless people, and entertained millions.

Now let me flip on the TV and see if he’s still talking about those Hillbilly Hot Dogs in West Virginia.

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  1. Keith Preston Member
    Keith Preston
    @

    PHenry (View Comment):

    Jon Gabriel, Ed. (View Comment):
    Guy Fieri: The Donald Trump of Cuisine.

    I heard Trump puts Ketchup (or is it Catsup?) on his steak!

    He gets two squirts of ketchup…everyone else gets one.  It’s a fact.  I know.  I saw it on CNN.

    • #61
  2. Steve C. Member
    Steve C.
    @user_531302

    Keith Preston (View Comment):

    PHenry (View Comment):

    Jon Gabriel, Ed. (View Comment):
    Guy Fieri: The Donald Trump of Cuisine.

    I heard Trump puts Ketchup (or is it Catsup?) on his steak!

    He gets two squirts of ketchup…everyone else gets one. It’s a fact. I know. I saw it on CNN.

    This is a coffee snorter. A warning would have been appreciated.

     

    • #62
  3. RktSci Member
    RktSci
    @RktSci

    Hoyacon (View Comment):
    I know a guy (ahem) who actually saw an episode of “Diners etc” being filmed. Observations: 1) the show is very much a product of staff (this may be universally true, I don’t know). Guy shows up after the spadework is done and does his thing pretty quickly. 2) They have a selection of shirts ready and he picks one; 3) he did not come across as a jerk at all and was rather cordial to onlookers; 4) the staff indicated that he has “good days and bad days;” 5) the car is transported to where needed.

    #1 – Yep. Any of the shows where a star comes in and visits a place has had a bunch of crew work done before filming. Heck, that’s true of about any TV or movie done on location.

    He probably comes into a town, does 3-4 different segments in 2-3 days and then is off somewhere else. Food Network assembles them into shows.

    • #63
  4. RktSci Member
    RktSci
    @RktSci

    I enjoy triple D and have been to a few of the places that were on it. His other shows, not so much. His one “stand and stir” show, <i>Guy’s Big Bite</i> wasn’t very good in the first few seasons. It might be OK now. I don’t like the game shows he’s done. To me it’s hard to compete with Chopped and Iron Chef.

    • #64
  5. Steve C. Member
    Steve C.
    @user_531302

    JcTPatriot (View Comment):
    I’ve been a Triple D fan for years. Yes, I’ve been told many times, “I can’t stand that guy for more than two minutes” and I understand. He’s like Geddy Lee’s voice: he’s not for everyone.

    I’ve never been in a Fieri restaurant, but I have been to six (so far) Texas restaurants featured on Triple D.

    My favorite? Easy. Chop House Burgers in Arlington Texas. I go every time I go up to Arlington to see my son. He doesn’t mind, because I always pay.

    I did cheat some – I’ve been to the Monument Café before and after Fieri was there.

    At the Noble Pig, it was good, but it was a mess. Really sloppy sandwiches.

    I have only been for breakfast, but if lunch and dinner are even half as good, then Magnolia Café is incredible.

    Finally for BBQ, Bun ‘N’ Barrel Restaurant and Louie Mueller BBQ Restaurant are really excellent places.

    There’s my six, how about you, Jon? And who has been to more?

    I’ll have to try Chop House.

    Monument Cafe, one of the worst service experiences we’ve had in 40 years. We’ve been back since and it was good all around.

    Magnolia Cafe, sorry, it was okay but nothing to write home to mom about.

    Twisted Root, the original on Commerce is still the best but the others are good. They’ve changed menus a bunch of times (simplified) and raised their prices.

    Cane Rosso on Commerce, very good.

    Pecan Lodge BBQ, the most over rated BBQ place I’ve ever patronized. Pricey, crowded and did I mention it’s the most over rated BBQ place I’ve ever patronized?

     

     

    • #65
  6. Steve C. Member
    Steve C.
    @user_531302

    RktSci (View Comment):

    Hoyacon (View Comment):
    I know a guy (ahem) who actually saw an episode of “Diners etc” being filmed. Observations: 1) the show is very much a product of staff (this may be universally true, I don’t know). Guy shows up after the spadework is done and does his thing pretty quickly. 2) They have a selection of shirts ready and he picks one; 3) he did not come across as a jerk at all and was rather cordial to onlookers; 4) the staff indicated that he has “good days and bad days;” 5) the car is transported to where needed.

    #1 – Yep. Any of the shows where a star comes in and visits a place has had a bunch of crew work done before filming. Heck, that’s true of about any TV or movie done on location.

    He probably comes into a town, does 3-4 different segments in 2-3 days and then is off somewhere else. Food Network assembles them into shows.

    If you really want disappointment in your life, read the Wikipedia entry for Iron Chef.

    • #66
  7. Steve C. Member
    Steve C.
    @user_531302

     

    • #67
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