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I’ve always felt like I was at home in the water.

I grew up in Arkansas rice country, next to the muddy Black River. Plenty of rain throughout the year made our already hot summers muggy and miserable. The rain always provided temporary relief from the humidity, but as soon as it stopped, misery set in with a new wave of wet heat, mosquitoes, and chiggers. I spent every summer with red, itchy welts up and down my legs, but it never stopped me from celebrating the rain by dancing around in it barefoot, with my face held up to the sky to catch raindrops in my mouth. I loved splashing through the puddles in the driveway, and disrupting the mini-waterfalls created by the rocks in the ditch. By the time I was done, I was always covered in grass clippings and pine needles.

We would go fishing in the river, but you couldn’t swim in it unless you wanted to risk getting bit by a cottonmouth. Best catfish I’ve ever eaten came out of that river. We’d run across the gravel road barefoot, scale the muddy levee, and pull out our fishing poles and snack bags full of dry cereal or baloney sandwiches. We didn’t care if we even caught a fish, we just liked being outside in the shade.

The rice fields surrounding my childhood home were always full of water. We never had a big swimming pool in our yard because the dried pecan husks and leaves would fall into it. I don’t think Dad wanted to add “cleaning the pool” to his already never-ending list of chores. He was a farmer, and he sometimes dug us out a little area in the corner of one of his rice fields near the well pump because the water was too cold for the snakes. That was our swimming pool.

From the beginning of May to the end of August, I really only wore shoes if we were going to church. When we came back inside from playing, we had to wash our feet off with the water hose because running through Mom’s nice clean house with muddy feet was grounds for a whoopin’. That water hose was one of our most favorite things to play with. We’d hose down the carport and porches, and pretend we had an ice-skating rink, falling into a pile of giggles when we messed up our “triple-axel cow deluxe toe spin” like we’d seen on the Olympics. We’d use it to turn some of the dirt at the edge of the garden into mud. We’d sink our little feet up to our knees in the mud, eventually letting the cool mud bake onto our skin under the hot sun, then pretend we were ducks. We’d plug the hose into the sprinkler and spend hours running back and forth through the jets of water. That water hose fueled our balloon and water gun wars, our spray fights, and made rainbows dance in the sky.

As we got older, we were able to go on float trips on Spring River with the cousins. I always enjoyed laying on my back in the cool water, feeling it trickle through my mane of hair while the fish occasionally brushed by. You could see to the bottom of Spring River in most places as it wasn’t very deep or muddy. The water was cool enough to be refreshing in the summer, but warm enough that your skin didn’t go numb. We knew to stay out of the reed-like grass because there were leeches. Once the float trip was over, we’d go up on the bank to the pavilion where the adults had delicious, juicy BBQ cooked. Then we were right back in the river to rinse our sticky hands and ride the 30 ft current like it was our own personal water-slide.

Even through my most difficult times, I turned to the water for comfort and belonging. It always felt like my sins were getting washed away as I drifted half-submerged down the river. Sensory deprivation has a way of making the world feel far away and unimportant. This was a way for me to align my thoughts and feelings, and come to terms with decisions I’ve had to make. As long as I was in the water, I knew it would protect me from the world, even if just for a little while, and I had time to make sense of everything going on.

Every year, right as the summer starts to come around, I get excited about going back into the water. Though I’ve finally found my own place in the world to call home, I still look forward to that feeling the water gives me —

— that feeling of Home.

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  1. JustmeinAZ Member
    JustmeinAZ
    @JustmeinAZ

    What great memories!

    I don’t think today’s kids will have the memories we do of running around dirty and barefoot all day, coming home only at the end of the day for dinner.

    • #1
  2. She Member
    She
    @She

    Just perfect.  Your descriptions are so clear and heartfelt that I can see your memories in my mind’s eye as I read through them.

    • #2
  3. bridget Inactive
    bridget
    @bridget

    What a lovely essay!

    • #3
  4. Judge Mental Member
    Judge Mental
    @JudgeMental

    That was nice.  It’s the simple stuff that produces the best memories.

    • #4
  5. RightAngles Member
    RightAngles
    @RightAngles

    Beautiful writing! I was right there with you. My grandparents had a chicken farm in Arkansas for a time. Here’s me in the Roaring River:

    • #5
  6. JS Coolidge
    JS
    @JulieSnapp

    RightAngles (View Comment):
    Beautiful writing! I was right there with you. My grandparents had a chicken farm in Arkansas for a time. Here’s me in the Roaring River:

    South of Roaring River State Park is Eureka Springs, home to the giant Jesus statue that used to be situated in a little park where you could go watch the Passion Play. Mom and Dad used to take us when we were kids. The statue would get incredibly hot during the summer and I remember racing up the hill so I could touch “White Jesus” only to burn my hand.

    • #6
  7. RightAngles Member
    RightAngles
    @RightAngles

    JS (View Comment):

    RightAngles (View Comment):
    Beautiful writing! I was right there with you. My grandparents had a chicken farm in Arkansas for a time. Here’s me in the Roaring River:

    South of Roaring River State Park is Eureka Springs, home to the giant Jesus statue that used to be situated in a little park where you could go watch the Passion Play. Mom and Dad used to take us when we were kids. The statue would get incredibly hot during the summer and I remember racing up the hill so I could touch “White Jesus” only to burn my hand.

    I’m so glad that you have such similar childhood memories to mine, even though you’re so much younger. It gives me hope somehow.

    • #7
  8. Kay of MT Inactive
    Kay of MT
    @KayofMT

    You poor abused child, didn’t you know you didn’t need to be in the river to get bit by a cotton mouth? I lived for two years as a child in AR, Pike Co., near the Caddo River. My grandmother had a porch swing, and one afternoon I was swingin’ and singin’ as fast and as high as I could go, when gram came out the door with a hoe in her hand. She sternly told me to stop both the swingin’ and singing’ which I did for a change.

    She had such a serious look on her face that for once I obeyed her without quibbling. She ordered me off the swing and to get away quickly, and as I did I looked up and there was a cotton mouth hanging off the chain at the top of the swing near the porch ceiling. Gram made short shift of that snake, whipping it down with a swipe of that hoe, and chopping off it’s head. I had nightmares for weeks.

    This native Californian gave up on going barefoot, what with all the snakes, spiders, chiggers, and ticks. Nearly drowned in the Caddo River as it was too fast for my dog paddle.

    The rest of my kin folks lived and died in Hazen, Prairie Co. AR, rice country. The genealogist up there told me the “AR State Bird” was the mosquito, and I could almost believe it. However, am so glad someone has wonderful memories as a child in Arkansas.

     

    • #8
  9. JS Coolidge
    JS
    @JulieSnapp

    RightAngles (View Comment):

    JS (View Comment):

    RightAngles (View Comment):
    Beautiful writing! I was right there with you. My grandparents had a chicken farm in Arkansas for a time. Here’s me in the Roaring River:

    South of Roaring River State Park is Eureka Springs, home to the giant Jesus statue that used to be situated in a little park where you could go watch the Passion Play. Mom and Dad used to take us when we were kids. The statue would get incredibly hot during the summer and I remember racing up the hill so I could touch “White Jesus” only to burn my hand.

    I’m so glad that you have such similar childhood memories to mine, even though you’re so much younger. It gives me hope somehow.

    I’m hoping that somehow my own children will be able to make similar memories to mine someday though I’m sure they’ll have more to do with playing in the snow and hiking along mountain trails. :)

    • #9
  10. JS Coolidge
    JS
    @JulieSnapp

    Kay of MT (View Comment):
    You poor abused child, didn’t you know you didn’t need to be in the river to get bit by a cotton mouth? I lived for two years as a child in AR, Pike Co., near the Caddo River. My grandmother had a porch swing, and one afternoon I was swingin’ and singin’ as fast and as high as I could go, when gram came out the door with a hoe in her hand. She sternly told me to stop both the swingin’ and singing’ which I did for a change.

    She had such a serious look on her face that for once I obeyed her without quibbling. She ordered me off the swing and to get away quickly, and as I did I looked up and there was a cotton mouth hanging off the chain at the top of the swing near the porch ceiling. Gram made short shift of that snake, whipping it down with a swipe of that hoe, and chopping off it’s head. I had nightmares for weeks.

    This native Californian gave up on going barefoot, what with all the snakes, spiders, chiggers, and ticks. Nearly drowned in the Caddo River as it was too fast for my dog paddle.

    The rest of my kin folks lived and died in Hazen, Prairie Co. AR, rice country. The genealogist up there told me the “AR State Bird” was the mosquito, and I could almost believe it. However, am so glad someone has wonderful memories as a child in Arkansas.

    My mother was (and still is) deathly terrified of snakes. If she sees a snake out in the yard, she doesn’t care what it is, she’s either got a shotgun or a garden utensil (hoe or shovel). She and my grandmother both will shoot/hack at a snake until it’s thoroughly mutilated, screaming in a mixture of anger and fear the entire time. It’s pretty comical and I tease them both about it. I’m not really afraid of snakes. :)

    When I first explained chiggers to my Montana husband, he said “If I ever get chiggers, I’ll never set foot back in that state.” He also didn’t believe me about how terrible rice country mosquitoes are until he spent a full summer here.

    I still have fond memories of childhood, but after leaving my childhood home, I hadn’t actually felt like I was home until I moved up here. I feel like I was always meant to be in Montana and it’s a wonderful feeling!

    • #10
  11. Kay of MT Inactive
    Kay of MT
    @KayofMT

    JS (View Comment):
    I feel like I was always meant to be in Montana and it’s a wonderful feeling!

    So do I. Have been here going on 15 years and have no desire to leave.

    • #11
  12. MJBubba Member
    MJBubba
    @

    We lived in the Tennessee hills, but for reasons of family connections I spent my summers in Pokey.  We were just a few miles downriver from you, fishing Black River from the confluence of Current River down to Mill Creek, in my Grandfather’s john boat.   Uncle Jimmy’s rice fields were further downriver, halfway to Hoxie.   We would float Spring River, too.   What fun.

    Good times.   Thanks for sharing your memories.

    • #12
  13. Trink Coolidge
    Trink
    @Trink

    JS:We’d plug the hose into the sprinkler and spend hours running back and forth through the jets of water. That water hose fueled our balloon and water gun wars, our spray fights, and made rainbows dance in the sky.

     

    Your post is poetry, JS.  Thank you for taking me back to my childhood and for sharing yours – which was filled with exotic things like fields of rice and cotton mouth snakes nearby.  A truly wonderful account.

    • #13
  14. MJBubba Member
    MJBubba
    @

    A cottonmouth is a near relative of the rattlesnake that likes the water.  Their venom is similar.   In rice country, a cottonmouth will grow to be as big around as a man’s upper arm.   In summer when the kids are running and splashing around, the cottonmouth is highly likely to flee the scene.   But in spring or fall a fisherman needs to watch very carefully when choosing a place on the riverbank to set up.

    • #14
  15. JS Coolidge
    JS
    @JulieSnapp

    MJBubba (View Comment):
    A cottonmouth is a near relative of the rattlesnake that likes the water. Their venom is similar. In rice country, a cottonmouth will grow to be as big around as a man’s upper arm. In summer when the kids are running and splashing around, the cottonmouth is highly likely to flee the scene. But in spring or fall a fisherman needs to watch very carefully when choosing a place on the riverbank to set up.

    We had one get within 6 foot of us and hiss at us one day. We slowly backed away and raced down the levee once we felt it was safe enough.

    • #15
  16. JS Coolidge
    JS
    @JulieSnapp

    Trink (View Comment):

    JS:We’d plug the hose into the sprinkler and spend hours running back and forth through the jets of water. That water hose fueled our balloon and water gun wars, our spray fights, and made rainbows dance in the sky.

    Your post is poetry, JS. Thank you for taking me back to my childhood and for sharing yours – which was filled with exotic things like fields of rice and cotton mouth snakes nearby. A truly wonderful account.

    Thank you! :) I know rice fields are a new experience for someone who hasn’t been around them. @mjbubba grew up (or maybe spent a lot of time?) about half an hour from me, though we’ve never met (to my knowledge).

    • #16
  17. JS Coolidge
    JS
    @JulieSnapp

    MJBubba (View Comment):
    We lived in the Tennessee hills, but for reasons of family connections I spent my summers in Pokey. We were just a few miles downriver from you, fishing Black River from the confluence of Current River down to Mill Creek, in my Grandfather’s john boat. Uncle Jimmy’s rice fields were further downriver, halfway to Hoxie. We would float Spring River, too. What fun.

    Good times. Thanks for sharing your memories.

    Where was your put-in spot? We had a couple miles up from Imboden for the short trip, and over in Ravenden for the 6-hour float trip. Terry and I took the long float trip last summer on our 2nd day back in Arkansas. We ended up so burnt that we spent the next 3 days in separate beds to avoid touching one another accidentally.

    • #17
  18. Kay of MT Inactive
    Kay of MT
    @KayofMT

    JS (View Comment):
    We ended up so burnt that we spent the next 3 days in separate beds to avoid touching one another accidentally.

    That’ll learn ya!

    • #18
  19. JS Coolidge
    JS
    @JulieSnapp

    Kay of MT (View Comment):

    JS (View Comment):
    We ended up so burnt that we spent the next 3 days in separate beds to avoid touching one another accidentally.

    That’ll learn ya!

    You say that, but I’m sure it will happen again! :P

    • #19
  20. MJBubba Member
    MJBubba
    @

    JS (View Comment):

    MJBubba (View Comment):
    We lived in the Tennessee hills, but for reasons of family connections I spent my summers in Pokey. We were just a few miles downriver from you, fishing Black River from the confluence of Current River down to Mill Creek, in my Grandfather’s john boat. Uncle Jimmy’s rice fields were further downriver, halfway to Hoxie. We would float Spring River, too. What fun.

    Good times. Thanks for sharing your memories.

    Where was your put-in spot? We had a couple miles up from Imboden for the short trip, and over in Ravenden for the 6-hour float trip. Terry and I took the long float trip last summer on our 2nd day back in Arkansas. We ended up so burnt that we spent the next 3 days in separate beds to avoid touching one another accidentally.

    Sometimes we would put in next to the Highway 67 bridge in Pocahontas.  Sometimes we would use a ramp on land owned by the McFalls that was on the opposite bank from the Current River confluence and downstream about a mile.

    I suppose you might also be familiar with Current River Beach ?

    • #20
  21. Kay of MT Inactive
    Kay of MT
    @KayofMT

    JS (View Comment):

    Kay of MT (View Comment):

    JS (View Comment):
    We ended up so burnt that we spent the next 3 days in separate beds to avoid touching one another accidentally.

    That’ll learn ya!

    You say that, but I’m sure it will happen again! ?

    Jeesh! You need more than one lesson? Short memory span?

    • #21
  22. JS Coolidge
    JS
    @JulieSnapp

    MJBubba (View Comment):

    JS (View Comment):

    MJBubba (View Comment):
    We lived in the Tennessee hills, but for reasons of family connections I spent my summers in Pokey. We were just a few miles downriver from you, fishing Black River from the confluence of Current River down to Mill Creek, in my Grandfather’s john boat. Uncle Jimmy’s rice fields were further downriver, halfway to Hoxie. We would float Spring River, too. What fun.

    Good times. Thanks for sharing your memories.

    Where was your put-in spot? We had a couple miles up from Imboden for the short trip, and over in Ravenden for the 6-hour float trip. Terry and I took the long float trip last summer on our 2nd day back in Arkansas. We ended up so burnt that we spent the next 3 days in separate beds to avoid touching one another accidentally.

    Sometimes we would put in next to the Highway 67 bridge in Pocahontas. Sometimes we would use a ramp on land owned by the McFalls that was on the opposite bank from the Current River confluence and downstream about a mile.

    I suppose you might also be familiar with Current River Beach ?

    Lost count of how many times I got drunk there with classmates!

    • #22
  23. Purrl Inactive
    Purrl
    @Purrl

    JS (View Comment):
    I still have fond memories of childhood, but after leaving my childhood home, I hadn’t actually felt like I was home until I moved up here. I feel like I was always meant to be in Montana and it’s a wonderful feeling!

    We moved to Hot Springs from CA when I was 10, but it never felt like home. Left the state when I was 21. Cue >30 years later, came back to live in Bryant (outside Little Rock) near family. Took a while, but now Arkansas feels like home. Either it changed or I did (guessing it was me – it *is* Arkansas, after all!): either way, as you said, it’s a wonderful feeling! Still can’t abide ticks or chiggers, though…

    • #23
  24. JS Coolidge
    JS
    @JulieSnapp

    Purrl (View Comment):

    JS (View Comment):
    I still have fond memories of childhood, but after leaving my childhood home, I hadn’t actually felt like I was home until I moved up here. I feel like I was always meant to be in Montana and it’s a wonderful feeling!

    We moved to Hot Springs from CA when I was 10, but it never felt like home. Left the state when I was 21. Cue >30 years later, came back to live in Bryant (outside Little Rock) near family. Took a while, but now Arkansas feels like home. Either it changed or I did (guessing it was me – it *is* Arkansas, after all!): either way, as you said, it’s a wonderful feeling! Still can’t abide ticks or chiggers, though…

    Chiggers can get pretty bad if you scratch the bites and ticks just gross me out! Bryant and Hot Springs are both in really pretty parts of the state, but I think Hot Springs has always had a slightly shady feel to it that’s gotten worse over the years. I’m glad you feel at home! :)

    • #24
  25. MJBubba Member
    MJBubba
    @

    Purrl,

    Welcome to Ricochet!

    Bryant is a great place, even for those who are commuting to work in Little Rock.   Good for you.

     

    • #25
  26. kylez Member
    kylez
    @kylez

    I didn’t even know they grow rice in Arkansas.

    • #26
  27. Kay of MT Inactive
    Kay of MT
    @KayofMT

    kylez (View Comment):
    I didn’t even know they grow rice in Arkansas.

    North East corner of the state, rice and mosquitos.

    • #27
  28. JS Coolidge
    JS
    @JulieSnapp

    kylez (View Comment):
    I didn’t even know they grow rice in Arkansas.

    Oh yeah! Arkansas is the #1 rice producer in the US.

    • #28
  29. Judge Mental Member
    Judge Mental
    @JudgeMental

    JS (View Comment):

    kylez (View Comment):
    I didn’t even know they grow rice in Arkansas.

    Oh yeah! Arkansas is the #1 rice producer in the US.

    So near the river?  Like along I-55?

    • #29
  30. JS Coolidge
    JS
    @JulieSnapp

    Judge Mental (View Comment):

    JS (View Comment):

    kylez (View Comment):
    I didn’t even know they grow rice in Arkansas.

    Oh yeah! Arkansas is the #1 rice producer in the US.

    So near the river? Like along I-55?

    Which river? There’s quite a few. ;p

    • #30
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