Strange Bedfellows

 

Last week, a friend’s wife posted a picture on Facebook of her adorable baby, clad in the onesie to the right. Under the photo, she’d poured out the usual lamentations about how sad she was that her daughter would not witness the ascendance of Hillary Clinton. I’ve seen the same (and much darker) eulogies on hope from every Facebook friend who gave birth in the last three months. Like Michelle Obama, many of the women I know apparently have an extraordinarily narrow set of conditions that must be met before they can feel proud of their country at election time.

What stood out about this particular post though, was the tagline at the end about where to find the onesie:  “From Otherwild, proceeds to Planned Parenthood.

I checked the website and, sure enough, Planned Parenthood — the organization that was founded to make sure the future didn’t belong to anybody, male or female, whom they deemed “unfit” — is getting a 25 percent share of proceeds off the sales of … babywear.

Now that I know what easy marks my feminist friends are, both my capitalist and do-gooder sides are inspired. I think I’ll slap a catchy fem-friendly logo on a set of shot glasses with a matching flask, offer it as the must-have cold-weather accessory for protesters, and throw in a free bottle of the liquor of your choice with every order.

Of course, I’ll send 25% of all profits to AA.

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  1. skipsul Inactive
    skipsul
    @skipsul

    I like your thinking.

    • #1
  2. 10 cents Member
    10 cents
    @

    If there are only females in the future do men still get the blame?

    • #2
  3. kelsurprise Member
    kelsurprise
    @kelsurprise

    10 cents (View Comment):
    If there are only females in the future do men still get the blame?

    Yes.  Next question.

    • #3
  4. 10 cents Member
    10 cents
    @

    kelsurprise (View Comment):

    10 cents (View Comment):
    If there are only females in the future do men still get the blame?

    Yes. Next question.

    How can you blame people who are not even living? You can’t be oppressed by dead [pick your color] men, can you?

    • #4
  5. MLH Inactive
    MLH
    @MLH

    I saw somewhere that part of the ticket monies for a film (Hidden FiguresTwentieth Century Women?) was going to be donated to PP on one day. May never go see a movie again!

    • #5
  6. Matt Bartle Member
    Matt Bartle
    @MattBartle

    Adam Corolla got there first:

    In Fifty Years We’ll All Be Chicks

     

    • #6
  7. MLH Inactive
    MLH
    @MLH

    I hope Camille Paglia writes something about the march-thingie. I just looked at her facebook page. Nothing yet but a new compilation book on the topic.

    • #7
  8. TheRightNurse Member
    TheRightNurse
    @TheRightNurse

    kelsurprise: I think I’ll slap a catchy fem-friendly logo on a set of shot glasses with matching flask, offer it as the must-have cold-weather accessory for protesters and throw in a free bottle of the liquor of your choice with every order.

    I already have had success with this by donating to HerRights.org.  It sounds very liberal.  Even my liberal-loving FB friends have decided they “like” it.

    • #8
  9. MLH Inactive
    MLH
    @MLH

    TheRightNurse (View Comment):

    kelsurprise: I think I’ll slap a catchy fem-friendly logo on a set of shot glasses with matching flask, offer it as the must-have cold-weather accessory for protesters and throw in a free bottle of the liquor of your choice with every order.

    I already have had success with this by donating to HerRights.org. It sounds very liberal. Even my liberal-loving FB friends have decided they “like” it.

    That’s Barkha’s organization, right?

    • #9
  10. Sabrdance Member
    Sabrdance
    @Sabrdance

    The good news is that if they get their wish, the punishment will be swift and self-inflicted.

    • #10
  11. Matt Balzer Member
    Matt Balzer
    @MattBalzer

    kelsurprise:I must say, this inspires both my capitalist and do-gooder sides, now that I know what easy marks my feminist friends are. I think I’ll slap a catchy fem-friendly logo on a set of shot glasses with matching flask, offer it as the must-have cold-weather accessory for protesters and throw in a free bottle of the liquor of your choice with every order.

    Of course, I’ll send 25% of all profits to AA.

    I think it’s important that I mention the Rhody-Balzer Booze Fund here.

    • #11
  12. Mate De Inactive
    Mate De
    @MateDe

    Ahhh feminists drive me crazy. They should just drop the charade that their movement is for “women’s rights” whatever that means since women have the same constitutional rights as men in this country, and just say abortion. We feminists march, advocate, lobby, fundraise for abortion, on demand, throughout the entire pregnancy and government funded, That’s it.

    Ever since the Clinton administration that is what they have been about and they don’t care who they have to put up with as long as abortion is safe. If Trump said he’d fully fund Planned Parenthood they wouldn’t have been out on the street yesterday. So they would have forgiven the whole grab um by the P@$y comment as long as PP is funded and he appoints leftists to the court

    • #12
  13. Phil Turmel Inactive
    Phil Turmel
    @PhilTurmel

    kelsurprise (View Comment):

    10 cents (View Comment):
    If there are only females in the future do men still get the blame?

    Yes. Next question.

    Exactly.  I present as evidence item #1 how Obama and his sycophants blamed Bush for every problem in Obama’s term, long after Bush was gone.  Man gone, man gets the blame.

    • #13
  14. kelsurprise Member
    kelsurprise
    @kelsurprise

    10 cents (View Comment):
    You can’t be oppressed by dead [pick your color] men, can you?

    Actually, the worst oppression still out there is coming from dead white men because during their formative years, our grrrrrrls are opening history books that laud DWM with barely a single significant sighting of a woman or POC (that’s “Person of Color” btw, as I learned from my woke friends posting from DC (and that’s just “DC” as in our nation’s capitol, btw)), and appearances by “WOC” (figure it out) are even rarer, and don’t even get me started on the dearth of alternate genders represented, which means we have a mammoth task ahead of us when it comes to re-writing then re-publishing hist . . . d’OH!  HERstory and if the DWM hadn’t been so LAZY — if they’d just put the tiniest bit of effort into finding some key player in every event from the dawn of time that fit every single demographic that may read about it sometime in the future, so that every little future personsit could have a hero/ine/it/zi . . . (okay, alternate grammar’s not my thing) who looked just like them — because how are they supposed to find anyone who doesn’t look exactly like them in every way inspiring???–  then we  wymyn wouldn’t have to do all this work now and could concentrate on more important stuff, like figuring out better ways to package pickles, for when all the jar-openers are gone.

    • #14
  15. 10 cents Member
    10 cents
    @

    kelsurprise (View Comment):

    10 cents (View Comment):
    You can’t be oppressed by dead [pick your color] men, can you?

    if they’d just put the tiniest bit of effort into finding some key player in every event from the dawn of time that fit every single demographic that may read about it sometime in the future, so that every little future personsit could have a hero/ine/it/zi . . . (okay, alternate grammar’s not my thing) who looked just like them — because how are they supposed to find anyone who doesn’t exactly like them in every way inspiring???– then we wymyn wouldn’t have to do all this work now and could concentrate on more important stuff, like figuring out better ways to package pickles, for when all the jar-openers are gone.

    Is that all I am to you a pickle jar opener?

    • #15
  16. kelsurprise Member
    kelsurprise
    @kelsurprise

    Matt Balzer (View Comment):
    I think it’s important that I mention the Rhody-Balzer Booze Fund here.

    Your ideas are intriguing to me and I would like to subscribe to your boozeletter.

    • #16
  17. Mate De Inactive
    Mate De
    @MateDe

    @kelsurprise I’ve heard the whole history is HISstory, so it is oppressive before. I find it remarkable that grown adults with brains that function properly, would ever make such a ridiculous statement

    • #17
  18. kelsurprise Member
    kelsurprise
    @kelsurprise

    10 cents (View Comment):
    Is that all I am to you a pickle jar opener?

    You?  NO, of course not!

    Who in their right mind would try and open a jar with a sock?

    • #18
  19. 10 cents Member
    10 cents
    @

    kelsurprise (View Comment):

    10 cents (View Comment):
    Is that all I am to you a pickle jar opener?

    You? NO, of course not!

    Who in their right mind would try and open a jar with a sock?

    Wait, I am not EVEN a pickle jar opener? Who is the other guy?

    • #19
  20. Matt Balzer Member
    Matt Balzer
    @MattBalzer

    kelsurprise (View Comment):

    10 cents (View Comment):
    Is that all I am to you a pickle jar opener?

    You? NO, of course not!

    Who in their right mind would try and open a jar with a sock?

    Everything I had that had a better grip was in the laundry..

    • #20
  21. Matt Balzer Member
    Matt Balzer
    @MattBalzer

    kelsurprise (View Comment):

    Matt Balzer (View Comment):
    I think it’s important that I mention the Rhody-Balzer Booze Fund here.

    Your ideas are intriguing to me and I would like to subscribe to your boozeletter.

    We are in need of an experienced wine correspondent…

    • #21
  22. 10 cents Member
    10 cents
    @

    Matt Balzer (View Comment):

    kelsurprise (View Comment):

    10 cents (View Comment):
    Is that all I am to you a pickle jar opener?

    You? NO, of course not!

    Who in their right mind would try and open a jar with a sock?

    Everything I had that had a better grip was in the laundry..

    Matt, she was asking for someone in his right mind. Wait for one of your questions.

    • #22
  23. 10 cents Member
    10 cents
    @

    Matt Balzer (View Comment):

    kelsurprise (View Comment):

    Matt Balzer (View Comment):
    I think it’s important that I mention the Rhody-Balzer Booze Fund here.

    Your ideas are intriguing to me and I would like to subscribe to your boozeletter.

    We are in need of an experienced wine correspondent…

    Don’t hire her. She keeps falling down on the job.

    • #23
  24. Matt Balzer Member
    Matt Balzer
    @MattBalzer

    10 cents (View Comment):

    Matt Balzer (View Comment):

    kelsurprise (View Comment):

    10 cents (View Comment):
    Is that all I am to you a pickle jar opener?

    You? NO, of course not!

    Who in their right mind would try and open a jar with a sock?

    Everything I had that had a better grip was in the laundry..

    Matt, she was asking for someone in his right mind. Wait for one of your questions.

    Sorry. In my defense, I’ve been drinking all day.

    • #24
  25. Matt Balzer Member
    Matt Balzer
    @MattBalzer

    10 cents (View Comment):

    Matt Balzer (View Comment):

    kelsurprise (View Comment):

    Matt Balzer (View Comment):
    I think it’s important that I mention the Rhody-Balzer Booze Fund here.

    Your ideas are intriguing to me and I would like to subscribe to your boozeletter.

    We are in need of an experienced wine correspondent…

    Don’t hire her. She keeps falling down on the job.

    In this case, that’s how I can tell she’s working.

    • #25
  26. kelsurprise Member
    kelsurprise
    @kelsurprise

    10 cents (View Comment):

    Don’t hire her. She keeps falling down on the job.

    I did not fall.

    I tripped over the empties.

    • #26
  27. OldDan Rhody Member
    OldDan Rhody
    @OldDanRhody

    kelsurprise (View Comment):
    Your ideas are intriguing to me and I would like to subscribe to your boozeletter.

    While I am enjoying the direction you and @mattbalzer are taking this thread, your OP casts a wider net:

    kelsurprise: I must say, this inspires both my capitalist and do-gooder sides, now that I know what easy marks my feminist friends are.

    The profits that can be skimmed off of the disposable income of these -er, babes – have got to be yuuge.

    • #27
  28. Matt Balzer Member
    Matt Balzer
    @MattBalzer

    kelsurprise (View Comment):

    10 cents (View Comment):

    Don’t hire her. She keeps falling down on the job.

    I did not fall.

    I tripped over the empties.

    I may have to reconsider. Someone who was truly on the ball would have a larger storage area for their empties. The tripping is acceptable, but the lack of space for empties might be a dealbreaker.

    • #28
  29. Matt Balzer Member
    Matt Balzer
    @MattBalzer

    OldDan Rhody (View Comment):

    kelsurprise: I must say, this inspires both my capitalist and do-gooder sides, now that I know what easy marks my feminist friends are.

    The profits that can be skimmed off of the disposable income of these -er, babes – have got to be yuuge.

    It’s not like they have families, so they’ve got to have a lot of discretionary funds.

    • #29
  30. CM Member
    CM
    @CM

    I decked out my kids in “Adorable Deplorable” shirts on Friday. We were quite happy.

    • #30
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