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We’re Gonna Need a Bigger Vote
Tonight the various contenders wishing to become president of the United States will get their first real test in the Iowa caucuses. The caucus (meaning “a gathering of Caucasians”) process involves Iowans grouping together to publicly debate which candidates have spent the most money in the state.
Following these impassioned discussions (frequently peppered with expletives like “gosh durn it!” and “hold on thar!”) the Republicans cast traditional secret ballots for their candidates, while the Democrats wave their hands in the air, shout, steal supporters from other groups, and eventually come to agreement via arm wrestling.
Still, the results in Iowa are very, very important because … uh … they’re first. Not because the state is a good predictor of national results (it isn’t), and not because the state has demographics that “look like America” (it doesn’t). But still, Iowa is first for a very good reason: because they called “dibs.”
Published in General
What is an evangelical and why do our talking heads know so much about them. It’s a serious question.
Ethanol wins every time. Even if you lose, you can always get blitzed.
I see frequent pauses in the future of this coverage.
Iowa might actually be needed to get to 270 this time. If Republicans take all the Romney states and pull the big 3 swing states, Ohio, Florida, Virginia, they still need one more state. Iowa and Colorado are the two best prospects.
A protestant Christian who focuses on the primacy of the Bible as revealed truth, a focus on Christ’s mercy rather than works to determine salvation, and often a radical break with a person’s past through a personal spiritual conviction, termed sometimes as born again.
It is a favorite past time of talking heads to discuss them as a fascinating foreign species because apparently none live on the coasts.
Hahaha Stilton!
Due to Christ’s instruction to “Go ye therefore and preach the gospel,” technically all Christians are or should be evangelical. But somehow in the mouths of newspeople or Democrats (but I repeat myself), it has come to mean “white redneck semi-literate bigots whose parents are probably first cousins.”
Excellent title!
Looks like I picked the wrong week to stop sniffing glue.
I wonder how long the word caucus will survive.
Congrats on making the Main Feed!
I have never seen the term so clearly defined. Thank you!
Nice! I see you’ve been studying up.
I think it helped GWB sweep his past troubles under the rug because evangelicals could see he was one of them. I don’t think the same applies to Trump, and I don’t think evangelicals will break disproportionately for him. Some evangelicals will vote for Trump for the same reasons as everybody else who is voting for Trump.
Good post. I again renew my request to The Editors for a headline of the year award, and forthwith nominate Mr. Jarlsberg’s.
ohhhh…. now I get it.
Did you feel an urgent need to explain the joke now that you’ve gotten it?
Ryan M: official Rick O’Shea joke explainer.
When I was little, I had a crush on Hipshot Percussion.
Well said, which explains why (most) talking heads know exactly nothing about evangelical Christians. To quote President Bartlet, you get extra credit for being funny and right at the same time.”
Thanks! I needed a little light-heartedness.