The March for Losing Our Girls: Failure of Feminism

 

Pencil-sketch-drawing-water-glass-window-girl_1I am re-posting my story in honor of the Women’s March on Washington. 

In the ’60s, I was little – just entering grade school, as feminism and civil rights were beginning to sprout seedlings. Struggles of gender, race, and the subject of equality were taking form. In the ’70s, well-watered, they bloomed into movements of great change. As I entered my teen years, equal pay for equal work, breaking the glass ceiling, and women’s rights made good sense and were a part of my culture and life. Breaking through boundaries became the norm. Free spirit, be natural (no makeup – no bra!), make love not war, were our mantras. Like any young generation, conservatism and the “establishment” were old school – our parent’s era. Traditional family values were synonymous with anti-abortion, stuffy, boring Bible thumpers – not modern or progressive – not me.

Fast forward to 2015. I read these stats (from the Women of Grace website):

  • Eleven percent of young teen girls between the ages 13-16 admit to sending or posting nude or semi-nude photos or videos of themselves. 37 percent admit to sending sexually suggestive messages via text, email, or instant messaging.
  • In the US, it’s estimated that one in every 200 girls between 13 and 19 years old, or one-half of one percent, cut themselves regularly. Those who cut comprise about 70 percent of teen girls who self-injure.
  • More US teen girls and young women, between 10 and 24 years old, are committing suicide each year, according to a report from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC). Firearms, suffocation/hanging and poisoning, including drug overdose, are the three most common suicide mechanisms.
  • Young people, between the ages of 15 to 24, account for 50 percent of all new STDs, although they represent just 25 percent of the sexually experienced population.
  • In 2013, a total of 273,105 babies were born to women aged 15-19 years, for a live birth rate of 26.5 per 1,000 women in this age group.

I picked up a copy of Marie Claire, left behind by a vacationer at a property that I manage. The contents included a story about pressure on college girls in sororities to entice fraternities through sex. They are told to go to mixers and instructed on what to do — how to dress and how to act. If you decline, you’re shunned. I was shocked. Another feature story focused on women and depression.

On the radio, I hear a local counselor discussing counseling young pregnant teens. She says they say there is no one to turn to … their parents are busy, and so much social contact is done impersonally online that they feel they have no guidance, no voice.

On “60 Minutes,” I see a lovely young lady of 17, a heroin addict in Midwest farm country – the story highlights the epidemic of hard drugs that have invaded our youth, crossing all income levels, suburbs, country towns, homes with privilege – good grades, opportunity, not inner city strife and struggle.

On the local news, a human trafficking story about illegals using young Hispanic girls for soliciting sex acts, calling them “meat,” and sending the money out of the country. Four southern states including Florida were involved, and several in my own community were rounded up.

Another story on the radio of young women enticed to frequent major sports events – prostitution if you will – and lured into a life of drugs with no way out. I had no idea this takes place.

Recent story about Colorado high school sexting scandal involving more than 100 kids including half the football team.

Transgender and alternative lifestyles have become the norm. Miley Cyrus came out in an interview as a pangender – I had to look it up.

Spring Break 2015 in Panama City Beach – multiple rapes in broad daylight, families leaving the beach because of extreme vulgar language, deaths from alcohol, injuries, so many confrontations with police, no respect, thousands of arrests, that they finally had to change the laws for next year.

Ads target young girls, encouraging them to get implants, Botox, tattooed eyebrows Kardashian-style – be perfect, or at least look perfect at all costs. These are all recent stories; I could keep going.

Back in the ’70s I thought that we were paving a way to giving women new business opportunities, dignity, and respect, but now I am witnessing a breakdown of everything that I thought we were striving for. Somehow breaking through barriers led to no barriers. This is not a backlash toward men. They are at risk too, by the same trash that society is peddling. Anything remotely resembling a moral compass seems to have evaporated – a societal breakdown on so many levels.

Even Marianne Faithfull, the girlfriend of Mick Jagger said in an interview that after a life of drugs and partying that brought illness and loneliness, “I finally found what I must have wanted all along (she’s 60), “peace, friendship, family and love.”

To young women everywhere, don’t buy what society peddles or, like Marianne, have a lifetime go by to learn boundaries are important. Respect yourself. Use your time in school to find your talent, and wait for love. The right person seeks your greater good. Travel, find your spiritual roots and cultivate them, talk and listen rather than text. Appreciate the importance of family and children – they’re the foundation of a healthy society. Ask for help. Time goes by quickly; it has been two generations and we should be in a better place by now. My mantra to today’s girls – “Don’t buy the lie.”

(Image: Water Glass Window Girl, pencil sketch drawing from FB.com/pencil sketching)

Published in General
Like this post? Want to comment? Join Ricochet’s community of conservatives and be part of the conversation. Join Ricochet for Free.

There are 122 comments.

Become a member to join the conversation. Or sign in if you're already a member.
  1. Titus Techera Contributor
    Titus Techera
    @TitusTechera

    Front Seat Cat:

    Titus Techera:

    OkieSailor:

    Mike LaRoche:Love is a battlefield.

    Sex (Eros) is a battlefield. Love (Agape and even Phileo) is not. Agape is self-denial for the benefit of another. Phileo is mutually beneficial conduct, “You scratch my back and I’ll scratch yours.”

    Who taught you all this stuff?

    The name Greeks would use for love of brothers in arms is certainly philia & that is in the immediate sense a battlefield: Loving one’s own is always going to mean killing some strangers.

    Titus – with all due respect, you’re overthinking Okie Sailor’s comment – I believe he’s saying sex alone is not love – it goes hand in hand with love – today’s culture leaves out the love part (the badly needed part).

    You’re probably right. Can I use this opportunity to apologize for the let-me-tell-you-how-it-is furor? I can only plead a partial defense–we need to focus more on the experiences & troubles we really are facing & experiencing & not hope against reason that Greek concepts are really at our command & will clarify our minds presto-change-o!

    • #91
  2. Titus Techera Contributor
    Titus Techera
    @TitusTechera

    Leftism would not have been possible without the ancient philosophers either: They taught mankind to criticize political & religious order, & they did not use coward words like latter-day academics–critique, my foot.

    Who taught people to organize regimes by principles & psychological analysis? The ancients. Don’t start blaming them–it’s bad enough that infinitely vulgar types like Popper have done it, & worse…

    Now, back to Rousseau: The education of the Emile is not meant for you to imitate–the extreme circumstances by themselves suggest that–it is meant for people who want to understand human nature. How they would educate kids then depends on judgments about politics & circumstance.

    He certainly wanted certain changes made, but for example he was all for different educations for men & women, & the sentimental education for women was really close to what conservatives want–except for the productivity & work & career part, which I hope is not now the capitalist essence of conservative education!

    • #92
  3. CB Toder aka Mama Toad Member
    CB Toder aka Mama Toad
    @CBToderakaMamaToad

    It’s been 25 years or so since I last read Rousseau and I can’t locate the one book I have with his writing, but my recollection of him is a man who does not believe in original sin.

    Such willful delusion makes him hard to trust.

    • #93
  4. Titus Techera Contributor
    Titus Techera
    @TitusTechera

    CB Toder aka Mama Toad:It’s been 25 years or so since I last read Rousseau and I can’t locate the one book I have with his writing, but my recollection of him is a man who does not believe in original sin.

    Such willful delusion makes him hard to trust.

    Yeah, that’s certainly true. But he was not under the delusion that man is not terrible. He just seems to have believed that it was a good idea to deceive some part of his audience or appeal to that deception to further some end…

    At least this much should be said in his defense: The story that seems to underlie modern politics is the story of the state of nature–which replaces the garden of Eden–& Rousseau was the guy who thought that that story should be explored fully & figure out just what is meant by a non-political being–that would be beyond sin, of course, or fully natural.

    • #94
  5. MarciN Member
    MarciN
    @MarciN

    I just want to say to Front Seat Cat and Martel and all of the other commenters that this is a fascinating discussion. I’ve really enjoyed reading it.

    • #95
  6. CB Toder aka Mama Toad Member
    CB Toder aka Mama Toad
    @CBToderakaMamaToad

    Titus Techera: At least this much should be said in his defense: The story that seems to underlie modern politics is the story of the state of nature–which replaces the garden of Eden–& Rousseau was the guy who thought that that story should be explored fully & figure out just what is meant by a non-political being–that would be beyond sin, of course, or fully natural.

    Sounds like an animal.

    • #96
  7. Titus Techera Contributor
    Titus Techera
    @TitusTechera

    CB Toder aka Mama Toad:

    Titus Techera: At least this much should be said in his defense: The story that seems to underlie modern politics is the story of the state of nature–which replaces the garden of Eden–& Rousseau was the guy who thought that that story should be explored fully & figure out just what is meant by a non-political being–that would be beyond sin, of course, or fully natural.

    Sounds like an animal.

    Indeed, which could be terribly cruel very innocently.

    • #97
  8. CB Toder aka Mama Toad Member
    CB Toder aka Mama Toad
    @CBToderakaMamaToad

    Titus Techera: Indeed, which could be terribly cruel very innocently.

    And then there’s cats…nothing innocent in them… how I love to watch ours.

    • #98
  9. Martel Inactive
    Martel
    @Martel

    Titus Techera:At least this much should be said in his defense: The story that seems to underlie modern politics is the story of the state of nature–which replaces the garden of Eden–& Rousseau was the guy who thought that that story should be explored fully & figure out just what is meant by a non-political being–that would be beyond sin, of course, or fully natural.

    So he bases his exploration of human nature on a story he basically made up that has no correspondence whatsoever with how either man or the material world has ever been.  “Resources were plentiful for every man who worked!  There were no competitive instincts!  Almost everything bad about us was ‘planted into us’ by outside corrosive forces!”  Yeah, right.

    Judeo-Christian fall:  Man fell because the broke the rule.

    Rousseauian fall:  Man fell because he created a rule (put up a fence).

    • #99
  10. Martel Inactive
    Martel
    @Martel

    Titus Techera:Back to Rousseau. The life & teaching are different. Whoever says Jefferson was lying in the Declaration because he owned slaves is a fool. Jefferson should have freed his slaves, but his judgment failed him there. Unlike Washington, for example. But his teaching was serious nevertheless. So with Rousseau–his understanding of politics & the modern predicament is independent, at least for the most part, from his terrible deeds-

    Life and teaching may be different, but they are related.  In Rousseau’s case, very much so.  For although he may not have wanted us to directly follow Emile, in his own life that’s what he did, at least insofar as having his own children raised by the State.

    Jefferson could also be a putts, but his ideas were often good.  Rousseau was awful on both counts.  He can stick his concept of General Will up his smelly Swiss tail.

    • #100
  11. Titus Techera Contributor
    Titus Techera
    @TitusTechera

    Martel:

    Titus Techera:At least this much should be said in his defense: The story that seems to underlie modern politics is the story of the state of nature–which replaces the garden of Eden–& Rousseau was the guy who thought that that story should be explored fully & figure out just what is meant by a non-political being–that would be beyond sin, of course, or fully natural.

    So he bases his exploration of human nature on a story he basically made up that has not correspondence whatsoever with how man or the material world has ever been. “Resources were plentiful for every man who worked! There were no competitive instincts! Almost everything bad about us was ‘planted into us’ by outside corrosive forces!” Yeah, right.

    Judeo-Christian fall: Man fell because the broke the rule.

    Rousseauian fall: Man fell because he created a rule (put up a fence).

    Rousseau, if you want to think of him as making arguments primarily, is a lawyer or advocate, not one of those bloodless logicians you might have in mind. He is not a simple, honest man, but he might tell you he is. He is a man of wisdom nearly unequaled, in his age or others, telling people what he thinks is the best combination of the truth & what they can deal with–well, you might not believe this, but you should take into consideration what he believed,–a better guide to his intentions.

    • #101
  12. Mike LaRoche Inactive
    Mike LaRoche
    @MikeLaRoche

    Titus Techera:

    Front Seat Cat:

    Titus Techera:

    OkieSailor:

    Mike LaRoche:Love is a battlefield.

    Sex (Eros) is a battlefield. Love (Agape and even Phileo) is not. Agape is self-denial for the benefit of another. Phileo is mutually beneficial conduct, “You scratch my back and I’ll scratch yours.”

    Who taught you all this stuff?

    The name Greeks would use for love of brothers in arms is certainly philia & that is in the immediate sense a battlefield: Loving one’s own is always going to mean killing some strangers.

    Titus – with all due respect, you’re overthinking Okie Sailor’s comment – I believe he’s saying sex alone is not love – it goes hand in hand with love – today’s culture leaves out the love part (the badly needed part).

    You’re probably right. Can I use this opportunity to apologize for the let-me-tell-you-how-it-is furor? I can only plead a partial defense–we need to focus more on the experiences & troubles we really are facing & experiencing & not hope against reason that Greek concepts are really at our command & will clarify our minds presto-change-o!

    Why don’t you hit me with your best shot? Fire away! ;-)

    • #102
  13. Martel Inactive
    Martel
    @Martel

    Titus Techera:Rousseau, if you want to think of him as making arguments primarily, is a lawyer or advocate, not one of those bloodless logicians you might have in mind. He is not a simple, honest man, but he might tell you he is. He is a man of wisdom nearly unequaled, in his age or others, telling people what he thinks is the best combination of the truth & what they can deal with–well, you might not believe this, but you should take into consideration what he believed,–a better guide to his intentions.

    Intentions schmentions.  “Wherefore by their fruits ye shall know them.” (Matthew 7:20)  Variations and derivations of his General Will philosophy have been used to promote every form of totalitarianism from National Socialism to Maoism.

    • #103
  14. Titus Techera Contributor
    Titus Techera
    @TitusTechera

    Me fly off the handle? Un-possible, like Homer failing English-

    • #104
  15. Titus Techera Contributor
    Titus Techera
    @TitusTechera

    Martel:

    Titus Techera:Rousseau, if you want to think of him as making arguments primarily, is a lawyer or advocate, not one of those bloodless logicians you might have in mind. He is not a simple, honest man, but he might tell you he is. He is a man of wisdom nearly unequaled, in his age or others, telling people what he thinks is the best combination of the truth & what they can deal with–well, you might not believe this, but you should take into consideration what he believed,–a better guide to his intentions.

    Intentions schmentions. “Wherefore by their fruits ye shall know them.” (Matthew 7:20) Variations and derivations of his General Will philosophy have been used to promote every form of totalitarianism from National Socialism to Maoism.

    Ok, then Christ really wanted Luther to spur the Empire to murder the peasant’s rebellion & Muenzer & the like to foster the peasant rebellions. Christ really wanted Catholic & Huguenot to slaughter each other in his name. They all said so. Does this sound like sanity to you?

    • #105
  16. Martel Inactive
    Martel
    @Martel

    Titus Techera:Ok, then Christ really wanted Luther to spur the Empire to murder the peasant’s rebellion & Muenzer & the like to foster the peasant rebellions. Christ really wanted Catholic & Huguenot to slaughter each other in his name. They all said so. Does this sound like sanity to you?

    Abuses in the name of the Collective have a hell of a more in common with Rousseau’s re-programming techniques than anything bad Christians have done in the name of the Gospel.  It’s not even close.

    • #106
  17. EThompson Inactive
    EThompson
    @EThompson

    Titus Techera:Here’s a really good article on feminism by Mr. Harvey Mansfield. He argues that feminism was primarily a matter of getting more fairness or justice understand as equality for women & has been remarkably successful, & in a remarkably peaceful way. But then because of the concern with justice alone, the effects of justice on American society were ignored–most of the article is an attempt to understand the price paid for justice.

    I would only add that not unlike the NAACP, NOW lost its usefulness. It accomplished what it needed to and then looked toward irrelevancies to maintain influence.

    The true injustice is neither organization chose to get their hands dirty and deal with the real issues of our time- black on black crime and the abuse of millions of women in Muslim communities.

    • #107
  18. Front Seat Cat Member
    Front Seat Cat
    @FrontSeatCat

    Mike LaRoche:

    Front Seat Cat:

    Why don’t you hit me with your best shot? Fire away! ;-)

    You are too funny! I’m not letting you off the hook – here’s my best shot….what prompted you to read this story? I would appreciate a man’s point of view here –

    • #108
  19. Front Seat Cat Member
    Front Seat Cat
    @FrontSeatCat

    Martel:

    As far as reaching them. it’s hard to develop a Grand Blueprint in a blog comment, but we’ve got to stand up for Truth, fully aware that us men will be called misogynists, women will be accused of weak apologists for oppression. Some approaches are more effective than others, but right now we’re hardly even making an effort.

    No effort=no results.

    Even Grand Blueprints fail, but it sounds like there is room for a start? Talking about this with sons, nephews? My heart breaks for them as well – sometimes you don’t realize you’ve fallen down a rabbit hole until you are laying on the bottom for awhile – it looks no different than the place you fell from – sometimes I wonder if young men would understand a story like this? 

    • #109
  20. Front Seat Cat Member
    Front Seat Cat
    @FrontSeatCat

    EThompson:

    I would only add that not unlike the NAACP, NOW lost its usefulness.

    The true injustice is neither organization chose to get their hands dirty and deal with the real issues of our time- black on black crime and the abuse of millions of women in Muslim communities.

    EThompson – I recommend the book by former Atlanta Mayor Andrew Young called “A Way Out of No Way”. Another topic that we should by now be further along – why have things seemed to not improve for the black community?

    http://www.amazon.com/Way-Out-No-Spiritual-Memoirs/dp/0785275088

    In this book, he says black families used to be strong, two parent households, church on Sunday, you helped out at home, went to school – tradition was important – no excuses.  When major road construction broke up the inner city communities, and they were not welcome in the suburbs – family life declined.

    Again – it’s back to strength of the traditional core of family, discipline, love, community, accountability that seems to hold society together and offers moral strength.

    • #110
  21. EThompson Inactive
    EThompson
    @EThompson

    Front Seat Cat:

    EThompson:

    I would only add that not unlike the NAACP, NOW lost its usefulness.

    The true injustice is neither organization chose to get their hands dirty and deal with the real issues of our time- black on black crime and the abuse of millions of women in Muslim communities.

    EThompson – I recommend the book by former Atlanta Mayor Andrew Young called “A Way Out of No Way”. Another topic that we should by now be further along – why have things seemed to not improve for the black community?

    http://www.amazon.com/Way-Out-No-Spiritual-Memoirs/dp/0785275088

    In this book, he says black families used to be strong, two parent households, church on Sunday, you helped out at home, went to school – tradition was important – no excuses. When major road construction broke up the inner city communities, and they were not welcome in the suburbs – family life declined.

    Again – it’s back to strength of the traditional core of family, discipline, love, community, accountability that seems to hold society together and offers moral strength.

    Everything I’ve posted on your most interesting thread supports this comment which is why I’m so dismissive of feminism today. I had my parents and family and some pretty good mentors at work to help me along the way. No need to parcel out responsibility to strangers with questionable agendas.

    Thanks for this post!

    • #111
  22. Titus Techera Contributor
    Titus Techera
    @TitusTechera

    I think now you’re being picky. If you want to play a game of consequences, then you do not get to judge which people who said what cause they embraced are to be trusted & which are to be mistrusted or second-guessed–especially not when you have your own ideology…

    • #112
  23. Mike LaRoche Inactive
    Mike LaRoche
    @MikeLaRoche

    Front Seat Cat:

    Mike LaRoche:

    Why don’t you hit me with your best shot? Fire away! ;-)

    You are too funny! I’m not letting you off the hook – here’s my best shot….what prompted you to read this story? I would appreciate a man’s point of view here –

    What prompted me to read this story is my intense dislike of feminism, particularly the type that exists in academia.  It’s all just bellyaching about the “patriarchy” and us dastardly “white males.”  And then they turn around and talk about “empowering” women.  There is nothing empowering about whining.

    • #113
  24. EThompson Inactive
    EThompson
    @EThompson

    Mike LaRoche:

    Front Seat Cat:

    Mike LaRoche:

    Why don’t you hit me with your best shot? Fire away! ;-)

    You are too funny! I’m not letting you off the hook – here’s my best shot….what prompted you to read this story? I would appreciate a man’s point of view here –

    There is nothing empowering about whining.

    Stop stealing my lines!

    • #114
  25. Mike LaRoche Inactive
    Mike LaRoche
    @MikeLaRoche

    EThompson:

    Mike LaRoche:

    Front Seat Cat:

    Mike LaRoche:

    Why don’t you hit me with your best shot? Fire away! ;-)

    You are too funny! I’m not letting you off the hook – here’s my best shot….what prompted you to read this story? I would appreciate a man’s point of view here –

    There is nothing empowering about whining.

    Stop stealing my lines!

    I only steal from the best! ;-)

    • #115
  26. Manny Member
    Manny
    @Manny

    At the risk of being provocative, let me say that it was a better world when women stayed home and raised children.

    • #116
  27. EThompson Inactive
    EThompson
    @EThompson

    Manny:At the risk of being provocative, let me say that it was a better world when women stayed home and raised children.

    You’re not being at all provocative. I simply believe that all people should have a choice to stay at home or work outside of the family unit.

    Except for men. They have far fewer choices. They really have to be the ones to change the tires.

    • #117
  28. Judithann Campbell Member
    Judithann Campbell
    @

    Manny:At the risk of being provocative, let me say that it was a better world when women stayed home and raised children.

    I totally agree with you :)

    • #118
  29. Jim Kearney Contributor
    Jim Kearney
    @JimKearney

    EThompson:

    Manny:At the risk of being provocative, let me say that it was a better world when women stayed home and raised children.

    You’re not being at all provocative. I simply believe that all people should have a choice to stay at home or work outside of the family unit.

    Except for men. They have far fewer choices. They really have to be the ones to change the tires.

    As Jerry said to George in the The Cheever Letters, “maybe not us, but two men could.” Times change. AAA card + wireless phone = tire changed, with time left over to learn the last great skill reserved for men, programming the TV remote.

    What can I say about Manny’s “provocative” opinion? Yaba-daba-doo? I’m sure he’s not primitive enough to be against women making their own choices, career-wise at least. But was it really a better world when men ruled the workplace, and housewives lit fondue pots in suburban Stepford?

    Fact is, my life and all our lives have been greatly enriched by the boomer generation’s female workplace pioneers. Women always worked of course, but only since the late 1960’s have upwardly mobile career paths opened to entire generations. Overall, it’s been a huge success for them, and for their families. Women today are passing men in education, and combined incomes have created more options for their families.

    Women have intuitive managerial skills which complement roles which suit men. Consensus building and giving positive encouragement come as naturally to female middle managers as barking orders and berating slackers suit male athletic coaches. Women are better listeners, which makes them better doctors, and better team players. Not all, of course. I can think of one presently awaiting indictment who’s an absolute scoundrel. But most.

    I remember the transition period between WWII and the entrance of the boomer generation to the workplace twenty years later. 1950’s moms weren’t completely insular, but often their conversational range was limited. Many were “Cinderella Syndrome” dependent in financial matters. The singular focus on child-raising left too many ill-prepared for when the kids left the nest, or for when tragedy struck. Their daughters had so many more choices to lead richer, fuller lives, and many have.

    For those of you not old enough to remember the “better world” of the girdle-bound gals of yesteryear, try this exercise in time travel. Get a DVD set of the genteel CBS Sunday night panel show What’s My Line? Watch the shows from 1953 onward into the mid-1960’s — 50 half-hours per year — and see cultural history jump forward one week at a time. Watch the male panelists size up the female contestants. See how the jobs being guessed change over time for the female contestants. Watch the fashions change. You’ll find illuminating, I think.

    • #119
  30. Front Seat Cat Member
    Front Seat Cat
    @FrontSeatCat

    Titus Techera:I think now you’re being picky. If you want to play a game of consequences, then you do not get to judge which people who said what cause they embraced are to be trusted & which are to be mistrusted or second-guessed–especially not when you have your own ideology…

    Hi Titus – was this directed at me? Not sure what this comment means?

    • #120
Become a member to join the conversation. Or sign in if you're already a member.