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“S’up?”
One of the best things about Big Data is how exactly it confirms Small Data. I mean, we all knew that the best way to make an impression on someone you want to make an impression on isn’t to say, “Hey. S’up?” We knew that, but now, thanks to Big Data, we know it.
The dating app Hinge, which is yet another dating app with yet another odd name — its more popular rival is Tinder — has released some of its findings and the results are, well, see for yourself:
Hinge users age 18 to 23 were most interested in the opening line: “Pain reliever personality: Advil, Tylenol, or complaining?” The next group, ages 24 to 28, were most drawn to conversation starters about lifestyle. Ages 29 to 34 saw a 34 percent higher response rate with personal questions such as “Two truths and a lie; ready, set, go!” And lastly, the 35-and-older crowd preferred pop culture references.
Okay, maybe a little too cute. But better than, “Hey. S’up?” And it’s good to know that gender differences, so under fire these days, remain powerfully in force on mobile devices:
Hinge’s study also compared responses by men to those by women. Assertive responses, such as “Free this week?” or “Drinks soon?” will draw a 98 percent stronger response rate for men. For women, they’re more likely to respond to messages about food, such as “Chocolate, red velvet or funfetti?”
Translation: men like it when women take a little control; women like it when men talk about dessert.
Again, what’s interesting about these Big Data findings is just how not interesting they are. But it does seem like we’re entering a period that we might call the Great ReLearning, where we have to reacquaint ourselves with truths that we already knew, but have been told — thanks to decades of idiotic progressive cultural backsliding about “just be yourself” and “it’s okay to be casual” and “men and women are basically the same” — were no longer valid.
Big Data may end up being the most powerful weapon in the conservative arsenal.
Published in Culture, General, Science & Technology
You mean this doesn’t work anymore? I better update my game.
“And the end of all our exploring
Will be to arrive where we started
And know the place for the first time.”
Very interesting, Rob. Thanks.
OK Rob, what’s your favorite pickup line? And what the heck is funfetti?
It’s a long way back, but I have always thought the differences are too powerful for progs to crush forever. If Big Data can slap them upside the head, more power to them!
At least you had game.
My problem with these dating sites is that I do not want to date anybody that would date me. It shows that they have a lack of class.
Last year my credit card number got swiped at a gas station.
Suddenly my card was used at 4 Asian dating websites.
It wasn’t so bad losing the money, but I felt a little self-conscious that not one Asian girl showed up at my house for a date.
My guess is these dating sites are all fake.
Pajama Boy: Chocolate, red velvet or funfetti?
Little Too Cute: How can I decide, Big Data? ;) Drinks soon?
Forgive me for being skeptical about any great relearning.
Your problem there is that PJB is asking for that froo-froo for himself.
Eric Hines
That’s why I haven’t had a date in over three years. I’m a bum. I see the ‘ladies’ dating fellas like me, and I don’t want any of those types.
Maybe I’m shallow?
Speaking as a fairly aggressive female I agree with the first part of this sentence but wouldn’t appreciate any male that becomes too comfortable with this scenario.
As for the end of this comment- NOT! (Just order already.)
I would be really terrible in today’s dating world
I am not sure dating is what happens anymore. With apps like Tinder and Hinge I think you date less and “hook up” more. Provided you have the looks and the text message game to even do that.
I’ll have the funfetti. She’ll have the same.
Forgive me for being skeptical about any great relearning.
Casey,
I don’t think the great relearning will be optional. I’m afraid the Gods of the Copybook Headings will insist on it.
Chairman Meow say….