‘Comply’ is the New ‘Coexist’

 

Comply Logo

Several days have passed since the Supreme Court ruled in favor of same-sex marriage, but the kulturkampf marches on. Nearly every media outlet unveiled rainbow flag versions of their logos, rainbow-filtered avatars filled social media, and the President lit up the White House itself in the colors of the pride banner.

Since then, news outlets have published calls to abolish the tax exemption for churches, legalize polygamy, and shame those too slow in celebrating the new order. In The Atlantic, Matt Schiavenza complained that sports teams aren’t bowing to the new idol fast enough:

The Supreme Court’s declaration that same-sex marriage was constitutional triggered widespread jubilation across the United States on Friday, as millions of people took to Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram to show their support. This enthusiasm was matched by numerous brands, such as Chipotle and Target, who used cleverly produced tweets to trumpet their position on Twitter.

The response from the country’s sports teams, by contrast, were relatively muted. Of the 122 teams in the four major American professional sports leagues—the NFL, NBA, MLB, and NHL—only five explicitly mentioned Friday’s ruling as of 7:30 pm Eastern time last night. Three—baseball’s San Francisco Giants, football’s San Francisco 49ers, and basketball’s Golden State Warriors—hail from the famously progressive Bay Area, while the other two (the NBA’s Los Angeles Clippers and Sacramento Kings) play elsewhere in blue-state California…

“Professional sports teams still haven’t been able to shake that toxic culture of masculinity,” said Dave Zirin, a journalist who specializes in the intersection of sports and progressive politics. “It’s still something that dominates the industry in a much more intense way than executives would like to admit.”

Maleness itself is now “toxic” and must be shaken off by all-male sports teams. Also in the new Orwellian America, some flags are more equal than others.

Bo and Luke Duke are no longer flying through Hazzard County on TV Land.

The network has pulled episodes of “The Dukes of Hazzard” from its schedule, a spokesperson for TV Land confirmed on Wednesday.

The network would not comment further on whether reruns of the series were pulled due to its inclusion of a 1969 Dodge Charger known as the “General Lee” which has the Confederate battle flag painted on its roof.

Might I suggest a “Dukes of Hazzard” reboot for the Obama Era? In the updated series, the biracial Duke boys will drive a Prius with a rainbow flag emblazoned on the roof. Daisy Duke will be played by Caitlyn Jenner, swapping the short-shorts for a pantsuit, while Martin Sheen’s Uncle Jesse will deliver socialist harangues penned by Aaron Sorkin. Boss Hogg will change his last name to Koch and order Roscoe P. Coltrane to arrest only African-Americans. Everyone involved will cautiously observe the speed limit and use light rail whenever possible.

The left has abandoned the classical liberal concept of “live and let live” for a Jacobin purge of counterrevolutionary thought. Over on Twitter, blogger Ace of Spades suggested that the left replace their COEXIST bumper stickers with a design that better reflects their new piety. Hopefully my design of the COMPLY sticker above will help Americans understand the new social reality.

There are 27 comments.

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  1. Mark Thatcher
    Mark
    @GumbyMark

    Hey Dude, that’s one awesome bumper sticker.

    Our overlords will approve.

    • #1
  2. Basil Fawlty Member
    Basil Fawlty
    @BasilFawlty

    The “l” is off by one finger.

    • #2
  3. user_1065645 Podcaster
    user_1065645
    @DaveSussman

    Meanwhile in NYC today: At the planned American flag burning the only people who showed up supported the flag.

    There is hope.

    https://www.periscope.tv/w/aGRxHTU1MjM2MnwzMjE5MzA3MVVSr1O8ByORK4PQX2mbK3Jp0so0Ts-5FjVKeJXsuQ-L

    • #3
  4. Flapjack Member
    Flapjack
    @Flapjack

    Agree that the “L” should be something different. It’s too gun-like at the moment. Can’t have that!

    • #4
  5. Ricochet Member
    Ricochet
    @EustaceCScrubb

    Maybe in the future there will be peace.coexist sci-fi

    • #5
  6. Guruforhire Member
    Guruforhire
    @Guruforhire

    Why is that every day that goes by Rage Against The Machine sounds increasingly reactionary?

    • #6
  7. Luke Thatcher
    Luke
    @Luke

    ShutUpAndTakeMyMoney

    I want that bumper sticker…

    • #7
  8. user_278007 Inactive
    user_278007
    @RichardFulmer

    Nice bumper sticker, but you left off the “or else.”

    • #8
  9. user_82762 Thatcher
    user_82762
    @JamesGawron

    Regards,

    Jim

    • #9
  10. HeartofAmerica Inactive
    HeartofAmerica
    @HeartofAmerica

    Luke:ShutUpAndTakeMyMoney

    I want that bumper sticker…

    I must have this!

    • #10
  11. Katie O Inactive
    Katie O
    @KatieO

    Nice! Is the “m” something already? If not,maybe the NBC peacock could be an “m”.

    nbcpeacockbw

    • #11
  12. Palaeologus Inactive
    Palaeologus
    @Palaeologus

    Jon Gabriel, Ed.: “Professional sports teams still haven’t been able to shake that toxic culture of masculinity,” said Dave Zirin, a journalist who specializes in the intersection of sports and progressive politics. “It’s still something that dominates the industry in a much more intense way than executives would like to admit.”

    That not-so-young man is in serious need of a wedgie.

    Can you imagine being the sportswriter for The Nation? He must receive a non-stop series of e-mails with titles like: “Why the Pick-and-Roll is Fascist.”

    • #12
  13. tom Member
    tom
    @TomGarrett

    Palaeologus:

    Jon Gabriel, Ed.: “Professional sports teams still haven’t been able to shake that toxic culture of masculinity,” said Dave Zirin, a journalist who specializes in the intersection of sports and progressive politics. “It’s still something that dominates the industry in a much more intense way than executives would like to admit.”

    That not-so-young man is in serious need of a wedgie.

    Can you imagine being the sportswriter for The Nation? He must receive a non-stop series of e-mails with titles like: “Why the Pick-and-Roll is Fascist.”

    Important thing to note about Zirin is that he’s an avowed socialist, but he’s presented in mainstream media circles (e.g. ESPN’s Outside the Lines) as a neutral observer, no adjectives or qualifiers needed.

    As I’ve said many times, someone who is as far to the right as Zirin is to the left would have no chance—none—of being permitted to be a regular guest on ESPN programming, particularly as an allegedly non-ideological commentator.

    • #13
  14. The King Prawn Inactive
    The King Prawn
    @TheKingPrawn

    We joke now, but the left has legal imprimatur to force compliance. It won’t just be twitter and yelp campaigns shutting down businesses. The state will run a parallel course of legal harassment.

    • #14
  15. Eeyore Member
    Eeyore
    @Eeyore

    The King Prawn: The state will run a parallel course of legal harassment.

    …he says with some authority.

    • #15
  16. The King Prawn Inactive
    The King Prawn
    @TheKingPrawn

    Eeyore:

    The King Prawn: The state will run a parallel course of legal harassment.

    …he says with some authority.

    It started in Washington State 2 years before the SCOTUS ruling. It wasn’t the gay couple who sued the florist, it was the state’s attorney general.

    Washington state Attorney General Bob Ferguson announced Tuesday [4/9/13] a lawsuit against an eastern Washington florist who refused to provide flowers for a same-sex marriage ceremony…

    “As Attorney General, it is my job to enforce the laws of the state of Washington,” Ferguson said in a released statement. “Under the Consumer Protection Act, it is unlawful to discriminate against customers on the basis of sexual orientation. If a business provides a product or service to opposite-sex couples for their weddings, then it must provide same-sex couples the same product or service.”

    Ferguson is seeking a permanent injunction requiring the shop to serve customers without regard to sexual orientation and a $2,000 fine for each violation of the law, according to the release. (emphasis added)

    Comply, indeed.

    • #16
  17. Ricochet Member
    Ricochet
    @

    The King Prawn:

    Eeyore:

    The King Prawn: The state will run a parallel course of legal harassment.

    …he says with some authority.

    It started in Washington State 2 years before the SCOTUS ruling. It wasn’t the gay couple who sued the florist, it was the state’s attorney general.

    Washington state Attorney General Bob Ferguson announced Tuesday [4/9/13] a lawsuit against an eastern Washington florist who refused to provide flowers for a same-sex marriage ceremony…

    “As Attorney General, it is my job to enforce the laws of the state of Washington,” Ferguson said in a released statement. “Under the Consumer Protection Act, it is unlawful to discriminate against customers on the basis of sexual orientation. If a business provides a product or service to opposite-sex couples for their weddings, then it must provide same-sex couples the same product or service.”

    Ferguson is seeking a permanent injunction requiring the shop to serve customers without regard to sexual orientation and a $2,000 fine for each violation of the law, according to the release. (emphasis added)

    Comply, indeed.

    I don’t know what’s worse in that case: The $2000 fine, or Baronelle Stutzman (egged on by Alliance Defending Freedom) continuing to challenge the decision. Quite a few articles I’ve seen suggest Ms. Stutzman needs some intervention by her family members at this time.

    • #17
  18. The King Prawn Inactive
    The King Prawn
    @TheKingPrawn

    Brad2971:

    I don’t know what’s worse in that case: The $2000 fine, or Baronelle Stutzman (egged on by Alliance Defending Freedom) continuing to challenge the decision. Quite a few articles I’ve seen suggest Ms. Stutzman needs some intervention by her family members at this time.

    Should she just bow to the state? The $2000 isn’t a big deal all things considered, but the permanent injunction compelling service against sincerely held religious convictions should raise every red flag from those who love liberty.

    • #18
  19. Ricochet Member
    Ricochet
    @

    The King Prawn:

    Brad2971:

    I don’t know what’s worse in that case: The $2000 fine, or Baronelle Stutzman (egged on by Alliance Defending Freedom) continuing to challenge the decision. Quite a few articles I’ve seen suggest Ms. Stutzman needs some intervention by her family members at this time.

    Should she just bow to the state? The $2000 isn’t a big deal all things considered, but the permanent injunction compelling service against sincerely held religious convictions should raise every red flag from those who love liberty.

    Two things:

    1. Ms. Stutzman was being fined because she violated public accommodation law in refusing the gay couple’s floral request for their wedding. As we’ve seen with that Indiana RFRA attempt, there’s no public desire to make a carveout for Ms. Stutzman’s beliefs.

    2. I’m going to say this gently: I’m not convinced Barronelle Stutzman is of the proper frame of mind to continue this fight (which apparently is going before the WA Supreme court). I think she is being used by Alliance Defending Freedom as a test case of sorts, when the offer by the WA State AG was a rather fair and just offer to Ms. Stutzman. And TBH, I have deep suspicions of groups like Alliance Defending Freedom when it comes to how they operate.

    • #19
  20. Eeyore Member
    Eeyore
    @Eeyore

    So I just checked The Store. Is EJ waiting for some, like, copyright agreement paperwork?

    • #20
  21. Lucy Pevensie Inactive
    Lucy Pevensie
    @LucyPevensie

    Brad2971, do you really intend to suggest that those who refuse to comply with unethical laws should be treated as having a psychological/psychiatric disability? You must have been taking lessons from the Soviets.

    • #21
  22. user_517406 Inactive
    user_517406
    @MerinaSmith

    Great design, Jon. I really would like to have these printed up. Rico store?

    I’ve been greatly annoyed by the kulturekampf, and was going to quit using Google Chrome, but when I realized that I use the service to fight everything they stand for I felt pretty good about it.

    • #22
  23. Aaron Miller Member
    Aaron Miller
    @AaronMiller

    Steyn:

    [….] the Boy Scouts of America provide a clue as to how it’s likely to work out. In the late Nineties, the BSA said no to gay scoutmasters. I was on the floor of the Democratic Convention in Los Angeles in 2000 when they had some Eagle scouts as an honor guard – and in my section of the crowd everyone booed. And I remember thinking, “Man, these Dems are nuts. Booing boy scouts?”

    But the booers won. Over the next decade, gay-friendly churches (Episcopalian, Congregational, and the other post-Christian ones) booted the scouts from church halls where they’d met for decades; Disney cut them off the list of approved charities to which their employees were permitted to donate their “Ears To You” fundraising proceeds; other corporate benefactors from the US soccer league to Lockheed Martin severed their ties …and the number of new recruits to scouting dwindled remorselessly, and so did their finances. And in the end the boy scouts’ leader caved – but too late. In the blink of an eye, the boy scouts had been, as my friend Ezra Levant likes to say, “de-normalized”, and banished to the fringe, and nice soccer mommies don’t want l’il Jimmy playing on the extremist fringe.

    That’s quite an accomplishment. After all, until Democrats figured it was safe to boo them, boy scouts were so mainstream that their very name is a synonym for someone kindly and pure and good-hearted. [….]

    • #23
  24. user_138562 Moderator
    user_138562
    @RandyWeivoda

    Jon Gabriel, Ed.:

    Might I suggest a “Dukes of Hazzard” reboot for the Obama Era? In the updated series, the biracial Duke boys will drive a Prius with a rainbow flag emblazoned on the roof. Daisy Duke will be played by Caitlyn Jenner, swapping the short-shorts for a pantsuit, while Martin Sheen’s Uncle Jesse will deliver socialist harangues penned by Aaron Sorkin. Boss Hogg will change his last name to Koch and order Roscoe P. Coltrane to arrest only African-Americans. Everyone involved will cautiously observe the speed limit and use light rail whenever possible.

    This is brilliant, Jon. You just have to come up with a name for the car, since General Lee won’t do. Maybe Mrs. Clinton? Ooh, better yet, Senator Warren!

    • #24
  25. Songwriter Inactive
    Songwriter
    @user_19450

    Tom Garrett:

    Palaeologus:

    As I’ve said many times, someone who is as far to the right as Zirin is to the left would have no chance—none—of being permitted to be a regular guest on ESPN programming, particularly as an allegedly non-ideological commentator.

    That is because the media is the Enemy. Including ESPN.

    • #25
  26. Fake John Galt Coolidge
    Fake John Galt
    @FakeJohnJaneGalt

    Randy Weivoda:

    Jon Gabriel, Ed.:

    Might I suggest a “Dukes of Hazzard” reboot for the Obama Era? In the updated series, the biracial Duke boys will drive a Prius with a rainbow flag emblazoned on the roof. Daisy Duke will be played by Caitlyn Jenner, swapping the short-shorts for a pantsuit, while Martin Sheen’s Uncle Jesse will deliver socialist harangues penned by Aaron Sorkin. Boss Hogg will change his last name to Koch and order Roscoe P. Coltrane to arrest only African-Americans. Everyone involved will cautiously observe the speed limit and use light rail whenever possible.

    This is brilliant, Jon. You just have to come up with a name for the car, since General Lee won’t do. Maybe Mrs. Clinton? Ooh, better yet, Senator Warren!

    dukes-of-hazzard

    • #26
  27. Ricochet Inactive
    Ricochet
    @DanMathewson

    John,

    You’ve made it to The People’s Cube.

    http://thepeoplescube.com/peoples-blog/coexist-is-now-comply-t16568.html

    • #27

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