Relearning Everything

 

In a world where access to the sum total of all human knowledge is only a few clicks away, human ignorance of history remains a rather magnificent thing to behold. We are born blank slates, without an ounce of knowledge or wisdom. Theoretically, 12 years of training at expensive government daycare centers (or schools) is designed to combat this ignorance. Yet not a day goes by where old, discredited ideas aren’t repackaged and presented anew as a recent stroke of brilliance.

From The Guardian today, we receive the wholly novel idea that if something is important (like tampons), it should be free. As this is the first time we’ve ever considered the question of whether the government can create better access to things people need than the free market, I will allow the author a full hearing before erupting in riotous laughter.

In the United States, access to tampons and pads for low-income women is a real problem, too: food stamps don’t cover feminine hygiene products, so some women resort to selling their food stamps in order to pay for “luxuries” like tampons. Women in prison often don’t have access to sanitary products at all, and the high cost of a product that half the population needs multiple times a day, every month for approximately 30 years, is simply, well, [expletive].

…Why aren’t tampons free?

This is a good question, and one that begs the follow up: why don’t columnists at The Guardian work for free? In her answer, the author might find she shares something in common with the loggers who cut down trees to provide the paper for tampons. She may discover shared motivations with the truckers who ship them across the country, and the engineers who design, build and maintain the machines that construct them.

Valenti’s distinction must be drawn on the question of need. Of course Guardian columnists should be paid for providing the service of explaining why there is no gay sex in “Game of Thrones.” That’s a luxury item. Tampons are different because they are just so darn necessary.

Sanitary products are vital for the health, well-being and full participation of women and girls across the globe. The United Nations and Human Rights Watch, for example, have both linked menstrual hygiene to human rights. Earlier this year, Jyoti Sanghera, chief of the UN Human Rights Office on Economic and Social Issues, called the stigma around menstrual hygiene “a violation of several human rights, most importantly the right to human dignity”.

This argument hinges on the premise that if something is important it should be free. It is an idea so original that it has already killed 100 million people since its inception.

Wittingly or not, Valenti is calling for the replacement of the market with a system where people receive goods according to their needs, regardless of their abilities. One cannot with intellectual honesty apply her standards of need only to tampons, as there are many products that all of humanity requires and fall significantly higher in the hierarchy of needs. Shouldn’t these products also be free?

Toothpaste and toilet paper are essential to health, and are needed by all of the human race. Shouldn’t they be a higher priority on Valenti’s list of free stuff that the government should supply? Food, water and shelter are all necessities of life. What would a world look like where all of these things were free?

USSR_empty-shelves-long-lines

The upshot of the bread line (or tampon line as we extrapolate forward) is that it is a great opportunity to catch up with your neighbors. The downside is that you would have to trade away this dizzying array of options and surplus for it.

tampon-aisle

Naturally, I don’t really think Valenti intended to make an argument for communism here. Instead she wishes to address a broader issue that reproduction benefits the entire population, but the costs are born primarily by women. She desires that men chip in to help cover these costs.

Of course, this subsidy existed for most of human history. It was called marriage.

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  1. Percival Thatcher
    Percival
    @Percival

    Frank Soto: She may discover shared motivations with the truckers who ship them across the country, and the engineers who design, build and maintain the machines that construct them.

    The very next time that I ponder the rotten luck and the bad choices checkering my own career, that will pull me up short.

    • #1
  2. Midget Faded Rattlesnake Member
    Midget Faded Rattlesnake
    @Midge

    I am rather disappointed in The Guardian for promoting dioxin-containing, non-sustainable tampons instead of reusable alternatives such as the Diva Cup and, yes, natural sponge (as in the dead marine animal) tampons that can be rinsed out and then reused – just make sure you’ve washed all the sand out before inserting!

    • #2
  3. Son of Spengler Member
    Son of Spengler
    @SonofSpengler

    Men require more calories than women. It’s not fair that we should pay more for them. We deserve free food.

    • #3
  4. Whiskey Sam Inactive
    Whiskey Sam
    @WhiskeySam

    Must not make String Theory joke…

    • #4
  5. user_615140 Inactive
    user_615140
    @StephenHall

    I wonder about the quality of free tampons from the Glorious People’s Hygiene Products Collective. Would they be as good as Soviet shoes or cars from the Socialist Republic of Romania?

    images 5609984414_0657a49bf0_z

    • #5
  6. Eeyore Member
    Eeyore
    @Eeyore

    Frank Soto: Naturally, I don’t really think Valenti intended to make an argument for communism here.

    Surely you jest. “A [ your choice here ] by any other name…”

    • #6
  7. 1967mustangman Inactive
    1967mustangman
    @1967mustangman

    Stephen Hall:

    I wonder about the quality of free tampons from the Glorious People’s Hygiene Products Collective. Would they be as good as Soviet shoes or cars from the Socialist Republic of Romania?

     Well I wasn’t going to go there but since Midge already made a joke about sand………I hear Soviet toilet paper used to have splinters………

    • #7
  8. user_615140 Inactive
    user_615140
    @StephenHall

    1967mustangman:

    Well I wasn’t going to go there but since Midge already made a joke about sand………I hear Soviet toilet paper used to have splinters………

     That sounds like a deliberate (and socially enlightened) measure to preserve the forests and forestall global warming/climate change.

    • #8
  9. 1967mustangman Inactive
    1967mustangman
    @1967mustangman

    Stephen Hall:

    1967mustangman:

    Well I wasn’t going to go there but since Midge already made a joke about sand………I hear Soviet toilet paper used to have splinters………

    That sounds like a deliberate (and socially enlightened) measure to preserve the forests and forestall global warming/climate change.

     Don’t forget the energy usage angle.  You use a whole lot less juice if you aren’t concerned with grinding up every last bit of wood.  I mean what’s a splinter between comrades?  

    • #9
  10. Valiuth Member
    Valiuth
    @Valiuth

    Stephen Hall:

    I wonder about the quality of free tampons from the Glorious People’s Hygiene Products Collective. Would they be as good as Soviet shoes or cars from the Socialist Republic of Romania?
     

     The Dacia was a marvel of human achievement. The fact that it managed to run at all was proof in the existence of a merciful God that loves mankind despite our sins.  My parents to this day are still talk about how we managed to all fit in that car with our luggage and an extra passenger every summer to drive down to the Black Sea.  A trip of some of some 250km that took 5 hours on terrible Romanian roads and was done without air conditioning. 

    • #10
  11. user_199279 Coolidge
    user_199279
    @ChrisCampion

    So if tampons are provided at no charge to women, the chains that have enslaved this gender for centuries will magically unlock and dissipate, a rainbow will appear in the skies above them, and cares and worries will evaporate into the aether?

    Well.  Sign me up then.  Take more of my money to provide something to someone else under the guise of, well, something.  It’s so wonderful to have the gov’t here to make things right amongst the people who are clearly too stupid to be able to care for themselves.

    • #11
  12. CuriousKevmo Inactive
    CuriousKevmo
    @CuriousKevmo

    I think that might be the car they raced against a Dog on the real Top Gear (The BBC version).  The Dog won.

    • #12
  13. Fricosis Guy Listener
    Fricosis Guy
    @FricosisGuy

    Stephen Hall:

    1967mustangman:

    Well I wasn’t going to go there but since Midge already made a joke about sand………I hear Soviet toilet paper used to have splinters………

    That sounds like a deliberate (and socially enlightened) measure to preserve the forests and forestall global warming/climate change.

    I used to have a collection of (unused) Warsaw Pact toilet “paper” I picked up in my travels.

    The worst had the texture of a granola bar.

    • #13
  14. Mario the Gator Inactive
    Mario the Gator
    @Pelayo

    Once again, marriage and husbands are out and Uncle Sam/Stalin/Mao/Castro is going to take care of everything.  Good luck with that.

    • #14
  15. Son of Spengler Member
    Son of Spengler
    @SonofSpengler

    In 1993, the then-First Lady considered it a scandal that childhood vaccines were not free. She blamed profit-seeking drug companies for standing in the way, and made clear that they were in her sights. “Unless you’re willing to take on those who profited from that kind of price increase and are continuing to do so, you cannot provide the kind of universal immunization system that this country needs to have.” [http://www.nytimes.com/1993/02/12/us/hillary-clinton-sees-hurdles-in-forging-health-care-plan.html] She proposed a program under which the federal government would buy and distribute all vaccines.

    The majority-Democrat Congress passed the Vaccines For Children act, a watered-down version Hillary’s plan under which the government would buy 1/3 of the national supply, at half price, and provide vaccines free to lower-income children.

    The result was predictable. Many companies went out of business, or stopped manufacturing vaccines. Some vaccines are produced today only because the government bribes a single company to make them. If that company experiences production problems, shortages result. Shortages and supply problems are common. And innovation on childhood illnesses has ceased.

    Relearning everything, indeed.

    • #15
  16. Howellis Inactive
    Howellis
    @ManWiththeAxe

    The one thing that I think should be free is lunch. I’m tired of spending so much on my lunch. Even if I bring it from home it still costs a lot, if I put any meat on the sandwich. And 100% of people need lunch. Besides, it’s time to prove Milton Friedman wrong about something.

    • #16
  17. mwupton@gmail.com Inactive
    mwupton@gmail.com
    @MattUpton

    Does anyone know what “free” means anymore?

    • #17
  18. thelonious Member
    thelonious
    @thelonious

    Thess:

    Does anyone know what “free” means anymore?

     I do.  It means “I” don’t have to pay for it.

    • #18
  19. skipsul Inactive
    skipsul
    @skipsul

    Wow.  There are lots of things that we “need” as humans to survive, and, er, for generations to continue.  What I’m, um, getting at, er, here, is that maybe…  well considering what we all think of politicians anyway…  I mean it’s not like it’s a major change of career…  I mean governments have to have tried this before…  right?  I mean with the lottery they already subsidize gambling, why not other vices too?

    • #19
  20. user_138562 Moderator
    user_138562
    @RandyWeivoda

    What is interesting is to read the comments on the original article.  At least a couple people seem to think that feminine hygiene products are all just a scam pulled on women by greedy (typically male) manufacturers and retailers, selling women something they don’t really need.  I’ve heard similar sentiments by people saying that nobody really needs things like mouthwash, deodorant, etc.  Apparently anything we regularly use that wasn’t used in the bronze age is the result of patriarchal/capitalist brainwashing.

    • #20
  21. Frank Soto Member
    Frank Soto
    @FrankSoto

    Randy Weivoda:

    What is interesting is to read the comments on the original article. At least a couple people seem to think that feminine hygiene products are all just a scam pulled on women by greedy (typically male) manufacturers and retailers, selling women something they don’t really need. I’ve heard similar sentiments by people saying that nobody really needs things like mouthwash, deodorant, etc. Apparently anything we regularly use that wasn’t used in the bronze age is the result of patriarchal/capitalist brainwashing.

     Relearning.  Everything.  

    • #21
  22. Ryan M Inactive
    Ryan M
    @RyanM

    Frank Soto: Of course, this subsidy existed for most of human history. It was called marriage.

     … this is why we love you, Frank.

    • #22
  23. user_615140 Inactive
    user_615140
    @StephenHall

    Randy Weivoda:

    What is interesting is to read the comments on the original article. At least a couple people seem to think that feminine hygiene products are all just a scam pulled on women by greedy (typically male) manufacturers and retailers, selling women something they don’t really need. I’ve heard similar sentiments by people saying that nobody really needs things like mouthwash, deodorant, etc. Apparently anything we regularly use that wasn’t used in the bronze age is the result of patriarchal/capitalist brainwashing.

     That will be a great stand-by when the 5-year plan inadvertently results in the collapse of production of mouthwash, deodorant, etc. You see comrades, it was a feature, not a bug.

    • #23
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