What Did I Just Read?

 

Old habits die hard. I still get up every morning and read the television trade papers. A story that caught my eye this morning was Hallmark letting go of one of their executives and consolidating her position with another person’s. In this day and age of tight media budgets, there’s certainly nothing unusual about that. What did catch my eye was this quote from the company’s press release:

Hallmark is aligning its consumer-facing touch points, including content, under a single leader… with a focus and expertise in the expression of the Hallmark brand to consumers — from product to experiences and now content, across multiple platforms.

What does that even mean? Is it actually in English? “Consumer-facing touch points?” Is that better than a consumer-facing field goal?

Published in General
This post was promoted to the Main Feed at the recommendation of Ricochet members. Like this post? Want to comment? Join Ricochet’s community of conservatives and be part of the conversation. Join Ricochet for Free.

There are 40 comments.

Become a member to join the conversation. Or sign in if you're already a member.
  1. Django Member
    Django
    @Django

    Dr. Bastiat (View Comment):

    All three of my kids work in consulting. They always have great examples of corporate-speak. I usually can’t understand the meaning. The better you get at business, the worse you get at English, apparently.

    If you speak clearly, you can be held accountable. 

    • #31
  2. Old Bathos Member
    Old Bathos
    @OldBathos

    Chris O (View Comment):

    Old Bathos (View Comment):
    Ashley stays in Delightville to jointly manage Smith Bakery and marry Bob.

    Wait a second, who was Bob? This is his first appearance in the synopsis. @ bobthompson ?

    Steven Seward (View Comment):
    So again, what are touchpoints?

    Buyer/seller interactions. A few examples are social media likes/comments, maybe using automated chat to help shop on the site, and/or product questions/reviews submitted on the web site. I don’t know how Hallmark is set up, but they might be able to track a user who streams content directly from them and add it to other data that builds up a profile.

    There was a casting change during the writing of the synopsis and the new guy looked more like a Bob than a Trevor. We only have 3 weeks to crank out this turkey so time is money.

    • #32
  3. Django Member
    Django
    @Django

    Old Bathos (View Comment):

    Chris O (View Comment):

    Old Bathos (View Comment):
    Ashley stays in Delightville to jointly manage Smith Bakery and marry Bob.

    Wait a second, who was Bob? This is his first appearance in the synopsis. @ bobthompson ?

    Steven Seward (View Comment):
    So again, what are touchpoints?

    Buyer/seller interactions. A few examples are social media likes/comments, maybe using automated chat to help shop on the site, and/or product questions/reviews submitted on the web site. I don’t know how Hallmark is set up, but they might be able to track a user who streams content directly from them and add it to other data that builds up a profile.

    There was a casting change during the writing of the synopsis and the new guy looked more like a Bob than a Trevor. We only have 3 weeks to crank out this turkey so time is money.

    Some of that reminds me of the old George Carlin routine regarding how we went from “shell-shocked” in WWI to “Post-traumatic stress disorder” after Vietnam. Or the use of phrases such as “at this point in time”, or even worse “at this particular point in time”. That last one really nailed it down. Carlin asked, “What is wrong with ‘now'”?

    When I started at a defense company in 1985, I came across a bit of satire entitled “How to Write Technical”. Even better in its own way than Carlin’s routine. 

    • #33
  4. kedavis Coolidge
    kedavis
    @kedavis

    Django (View Comment):

    Old Bathos (View Comment):

    Chris O (View Comment):

    Old Bathos (View Comment):
    Ashley stays in Delightville to jointly manage Smith Bakery and marry Bob.

    Wait a second, who was Bob? This is his first appearance in the synopsis. @ bobthompson ?

    Steven Seward (View Comment):
    So again, what are touchpoints?

    Buyer/seller interactions. A few examples are social media likes/comments, maybe using automated chat to help shop on the site, and/or product questions/reviews submitted on the web site. I don’t know how Hallmark is set up, but they might be able to track a user who streams content directly from them and add it to other data that builds up a profile.

    There was a casting change during the writing of the synopsis and the new guy looked more like a Bob than a Trevor. We only have 3 weeks to crank out this turkey so time is money.

    Some of that reminds me of the old George Carlin routine regarding how we went from “shell-shocked” in WWI to “Post-traumatic stress disorder” after Vietnam. Or the use of phrases such as “at this point in time”, or even worse “at this particular point in time”. That last one really nailed it down. Carlin asked, “What is wrong with ‘now’”?

    When I started at a defense company in 1985, I came across a bit of satire entitled “How to Write Technical”. Even better in its own way than Carlin’s routine.

    Sounds like the “Bastard Operator From Hell” stuff.

    • #34
  5. Old Bathos Member
    Old Bathos
    @OldBathos

    Django (View Comment):

    Old Bathos (View Comment):

    Chris O (View Comment):

    Old Bathos (View Comment):
    Ashley stays in Delightville to jointly manage Smith Bakery and marry Bob.

    Wait a second, who was Bob? This is his first appearance in the synopsis. @ bobthompson ?

    Steven Seward (View Comment):
    So again, what are touchpoints?

    Buyer/seller interactions. A few examples are social media likes/comments, maybe using automated chat to help shop on the site, and/or product questions/reviews submitted on the web site. I don’t know how Hallmark is set up, but they might be able to track a user who streams content directly from them and add it to other data that builds up a profile.

    There was a casting change during the writing of the synopsis and the new guy looked more like a Bob than a Trevor. We only have 3 weeks to crank out this turkey so time is money.

    Some of that reminds me of the old George Carlin routine regarding how we went from “shell-shocked” in WWI to “Post-traumatic stress disorder” after Vietnam. Or the use of phrases such as “at this point in time”, or even worse “at this particular point in time”. That last one really nailed it down. Carlin asked, “What is wrong with ‘now’”?

    When I started at a defense company in 1985, I came across a bit of satire entitled “How to Write Technical”. Even better in its own way than Carlin’s routine.

    My father had consulting contracts with some state and local police forces.  He repeated a story by a retired Captain about how hard it was the 1970s to get cops to be more careful and less conclusory in their public statements.  Mostly, they just started sticking the word “alleged” in every sentence. It got the point where a department spokesman started referring to murder victims as “the alleged deceased” and had to be corrected by higher ups. Language policies can be difficult to implement.

    • #35
  6. Django Member
    Django
    @Django

    Old Bathos (View Comment):

    Django (View Comment):

    Old Bathos (View Comment):

    Chris O (View Comment):

    Old Bathos (View Comment):
    Ashley stays in Delightville to jointly manage Smith Bakery and marry Bob.

    Wait a second, who was Bob? This is his first appearance in the synopsis. @ bobthompson ?

    Steven Seward (View Comment):
    So again, what are touchpoints?

    Buyer/seller interactions. A few examples are social media likes/comments, maybe using automated chat to help shop on the site, and/or product questions/reviews submitted on the web site. I don’t know how Hallmark is set up, but they might be able to track a user who streams content directly from them and add it to other data that builds up a profile.

    There was a casting change during the writing of the synopsis and the new guy looked more like a Bob than a Trevor. We only have 3 weeks to crank out this turkey so time is money.

    Some of that reminds me of the old George Carlin routine regarding how we went from “shell-shocked” in WWI to “Post-traumatic stress disorder” after Vietnam. Or the use of phrases such as “at this point in time”, or even worse “at this particular point in time”. That last one really nailed it down. Carlin asked, “What is wrong with ‘now’”?

    When I started at a defense company in 1985, I came across a bit of satire entitled “How to Write Technical”. Even better in its own way than Carlin’s routine.

    My father had consulting contracts with some state and local police forces. He repeated a story by a retired Captain about how hard it was the 1970s to get cops to be more careful and less conclusory in their public statements. Mostly, they just started sticking the word “alleged” in every sentence. It got the point where a department spokesman started referring to murder victims as “the alleged deceased” and had to be corrected by higher ups. Language policies can be difficult to implement.

    The women on NPR’s “1A” referred to the “alleged assassination attempt”. 

    • #36
  7. Steven Seward Member
    Steven Seward
    @StevenSeward

    Django (View Comment):

    The women on NPR’s “1A” referred to the “alleged assassination attempt”.

    Well, it could have been an AI-orchestrated hoax to benefit Trump.  Or an Israeli plot to take over the world.  Or a CIA plot by the same guys who killed Kennedy.  Or part of an elaborate epic movie production.   You never know…….

    • #37
  8. DonG (¡Afuera!) Coolidge
    DonG (¡Afuera!)
    @DonG

    Steven Seward (View Comment):
    Or a CIA plot by the same guys who killed Kennedy. 

    Same department, but different guys.

    • #38
  9. Percival Thatcher
    Percival
    @Percival

    DonG (¡Afuera!) (View Comment):

    Steven Seward (View Comment):
    Or a CIA plot by the same guys who killed Kennedy.

    Same department, but different guys.

    • #39
  10. Chowderhead Coolidge
    Chowderhead
    @Podunk

    While at a restaurant last night my wife cashed in her winnings on Kino. I seen this slip and it reminded me of this post. So naturally I put it under someone’s windshield wiper on the way to the car…

    • #40
Become a member to join the conversation. Or sign in if you're already a member.