Ricochet is the best place on the internet to discuss the issues of the day, either through commenting on posts or writing your own for our active and dynamic community in a fully moderated environment. In addition, the Ricochet Audio Network offers over 40 original podcasts with new episodes released every day.
Time to Drain the Brain Before Boarding the Plane
Heading back to the US for a week, so I am trying to do the “stay up all night so I can sleep on the plane” gambit. It will be nice to see Oklahoma at this special time of year, with the hurricane winds from the north, falling ice and other seasonal extras.
Once again with a feeling, a poor man’s homage to the old Larry King USA Today columns:
I read a story recently about the possible exhumation of the body of a notorious killer. Remains to be seen.
“Old Black Water” by the Doobie Brothers is a “Bohemian Rhapsody” for rednecks.
When podcasts or TV shows do a “year in review” episode, it’s their kind way of telling me not to bother.
I have lived this long and have never had the opportunity to shoot my cuffs.
Few politicians are skilled at retail politics. Most politicians excel at shoplifting politics.
In the future, when no effort is given, will we say, “He DM’d it in”?
Never let a non-Christian buy your Christmas tree.
A woman in England slept with 100 men in one day. Anyone who does the same will also likely go viral, one way or the other.
Have you noticed that Larry Bird and Bill Clinton seem to be merging into one being?
The worst song on the album is often the longest.
People are often dumbfounded by events. Few of us are ever smartfounded.
When you buy a food that is reportedly the #1 brand in its country of origin, rest assured if you meet someone from that country, they will have never heard of it.
If someone in a movie coughs, their character has a terminal illness.
Nuclear war is a terrifying prospect, but a nuclear exchange sounds downright civilized.
The wait time for help is ALWAYS longer than usual.
What if aliens are only advanced in space travel, and need help with things such as general hygiene, learning a trade and the economics of coupon clipping?
Most reaction videos are just bad acting.
People talk about rats leaving a sinking ship like it’s shameful. Hey man, rats wanna live too.
The state flower of Oklahoma is mistletoe, a parasite.
In Oklahoma, we refer to the cat, the car and the team as “Jagwires.”
Can we indict other sandwiches than ham?
The cranial pressure has returned to normal. Got most of it out of my system. Looking forward to seeing the USA for a few days. Hope y’all remembered to water the plants.
Published in General
You’re in top form today, Troutman. I’m not cancelling my subscription after all again.
Point of order – the song title is “Black Water”, and the lyric is “oh black water,”, not “old black water”.
Ever since I learned about the concept of “Chekov’s Gun”, foreshadowing has gotten a LOT more obvious to me in movies and TV shows.
Extremely witty and sadly soooooooo true!
Yes! You are experiencing longer than usual wait times? Really?? If the usual wait times are the norm then, how is it that I have never hit them?? Have you ever thought of hiring more operators?
Also, I will listen carefully whether your menu options have recently changed or not. But I wonder, how often do you change them?? You tell me this every time I call! And why do you think I would listen carelessly if they were still the same as last time?
Time to start dressing better.
If you have not already done so, see Asteroid City. Chekov’s gun appears and is never used.
It’s good to know that your sense of humor is alive and well despite your facing a long plane flight home.
Welcome home! (And Now you remind us about the plants!)
I had to look it up. Yes, I often did that in my much younger days when I wore shirts with cufflinks for Sunday-go-to-meetin’, and even after I stopped wearing cufflinks. But I think it’s been 12 years since I last wore a coat and tie.
More like five years for me, so I know what you mean. At this point, I have no idea what to do with my cufflink collection. It’s hard to find flannel shirts with French cuffs.
Stuck in my head now…thanks.
My favorite.
Runner up.
Sleep as much as you can on transcontinental flights. Before, during, and after.
That rule of dramatic writing–if there is a loaded gun in the first scene, it must be fired before the end, critically affecting the plot–reminds me of a rather exciting story from when I was about 8 and we had just moved to a new neighborhood, just before Halloween.
I didn’t know any of the neighborhood kids yet, so when the big night arrived, I just went trick-or-treating by myself. Halfway through the neighborhood, I arrived at a large, rather ill-kept-up house, where a woman in her fifties came to the door. She seemed very friendly and asked me to wait for a moment. Then she turned around and disappeared into the house.
After what seemed a long time, the autumn breeze suddenly picked up, and the front door blew open. The matronly woman was nowhere to be seen, but I could see an old shotgun hanging on the wall in the next room. Curious, I crept over, took the gun down, and released the barrel latch.
The gun was loaded with one shell, the other barrel being empty.
Replacing the gun on the wall, I hurried back to my place at the door just in time, as the woman returned from a back room with bowl full of candies. I selected a couple of my favorites and went back to the sidewalk.
There I met up with the neighborhood kids who were trick-or-treating as a group. By the time the evening was through we’d all gotten to know each other, and were having a great time. The oldest boy suggested that we count treats to see who got the most.
The thing is, even though I did not have a good costume, I was tied for third for number of candies! I will never forget it. When I go back to the old neighborhood, someone always brings up this memory and we all just shake our heads. Tied for third, without even a good costume!
[Tags: Humorous writing: attempts at, pitiful, the latest of my]
I still maintain I was “directionally correct.”
Hey y’all from Atlanta. My stop b’fore OKC. America, you look marvelous.
I recently met an exchange student from Germany, a girl who was nearly 20 years old. I delightedly told her I was a huge musical fan of composer Richard Wagner. She paused for a moment and asked “Oh, what country is he from?” Stunned, I thought Wagner was a National Icon in Deutchland. Though she admitted that she had never heard of him, she did acknowledge that she knew about Mozart and Beethoven, so I’ll give her a few points for that!
It makes me wonder if Slim Whitman was truly more popular in England than Elvis Presley and The Beatles.
What about Gérard Depardieu and France? Let alone Jerry Lewis.
Got this years ago as a gag gift:
Wagner was favored by Hitler, so that may have affected his place in Germany since the war. Seems to me there have been controversies in Israel about whether Wagner’s music should be performed there.
I first learned about Wagner in the 1950s, about the time of the first Sputnik. The same pastor (one of my father’s colleagues) who described the Sputnik news to us once asserted that he was not going to allow any music by that pagan (Wagner) to be used in a wedding in his church. Brave words, but Bridezilla wasn’t quite what it has become since then, and I never have heard Wagner’s bridal march used in a Lutheran church wedding in our denomination.
Remind me to send you the name of my Québécois flannelier.
Great pic! Could a woman resist Slim Whitman in a velour robe/smoking jacket? I just realized I’m not sure what a smoking jacket is.
Well, I can’t tell you as for style, but the function – as with the smoking HAT – was to keep the smoking smell out of the regular clothing.
Was wondering if there was a particular style…but yeah, that velour is going to reek.
The real question is “Could a woman resist either one of these wild and crazy guys?” I think not……..
One can still buy a proper smoking jacket and even a smoking cap.
Except in California, I don’t think we are even allowed to smoke.
One does not have to smoke to own or wear a smoking jacket or smoking cap.
If the jacket or cap emitted smoke, it would be a nice conversation starter:
“Sir, art thou on fire?”
“Funny you should ask that…”
Morticia Addams: Do you mind if I smoke?