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No more shooting in Chicago begins at 0900 hours and ends at 2100 hours.
We are now scheduling when a gang shooting is acceptable and when it is not acceptable. Not being able to read an analog watch will not be an allowable defense in the unlawful discharge of a firearm.
If you are considering getting even, or avenging any slight, no matter how small, or how large, please observe the new 12-hour rule.
If you are in the habit of Uber hijacking, remember no trigger pulling until 9 p.m. and no trigger pulling after 9 a.m. This might be the solution to Chicago’s lead overdose problem. They’ve tried everything else except prosecuting felons with firearms.