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Monday night, I was driving around doing some errands and I was not having even a teeny, tiny, mildly good time. Other drivers had exceeded the usual levels of irritating dumb decisions. (One person decided to change lanes at a traffic light and nearly backed into me until I honked my horn repeatedly to stop them. Over and over, there were those drivers who had to dodge in and out of their lanes trying to get a little bit ahead of everyone else. Etc., etc., etc.) I was seriously grinding my teeth.
And this came after a day with a group of 5th graders whose ability to make snarky comments about the topic we’re learning, or sigh loudly in irritation when I ask them to actually write down stuff in their notebooks, exceeds all I’ve ever experienced in 24 years of teaching this age group. How many days do we have left until school ends?
Anyway … I stopped at a traffic light, and looked off to the east, and–wow! I got a message from heaven. There was the gigantic, pale-yellow moon sitting right on top of the eastern hills. The Snow Moon was glowing in the sky, just for me. I guess it was actually full the day before, but it still looked full tonight. And, just like that, I breathed a huge sigh of relief and the tension slid right out of my brain and floated off.
It has now been three months since my husband passed away. Yes, I still miss him. Every single day. But in early December, when I was dealing with the sorrow and paperwork (wow…so much paperwork when someone dies…), I was feeling so lonely, and as I was driving back home in the evening, I came around a corner and was facing East, and just at that moment, the clouds floated apart revealing the full moon as it rose above the mountain.
I looked at it. I burst into laughter (not tears) and said, “Hey, how are you tonight? Thanks for this!” I was talking to my Sweetie, who (I decided) knew that I needed to know that he was up there in Heaven, thinking of me, too. During our whole marriage, he had been amused at my childlike delight whenever I could witness the rising of a full moon. I’d run into the house and urge him to join me. When the kids were little, I’d bring them outside to admire it. I just love seeing a full moon come up from the east. Yes, I know there will be another one next month. Yes, I understand it isn’t “magic” — it’s just orbits. But–it’s so gorgeous! And I love it! And in December, I realized that every time I see that big yellow moon, I’m going to remember his smile at my joy.
So, just when I was at the end of my rope again tonight…the Man in the Moon saved me. Thanks!Published in