Bankruptcy as a Metaphor for Aging

 

Paraphrasing Ernest Hemingway, bankruptcy happens slowly at first and then very suddenly. Growing old is very much like this. At 73 years old, almost every day brings reminders of the fragility of life and how the tempo of life has its own timetable. Many things are like that. Certainly, divorce is one. I know about divorce only by looking at it from the outside, but it seems to follow a similar course.

Aging was something that was easy to ignore for a long time but it now slaps me in the face every day.

For me now, time seems to be speeding up as I am slowing down. Time is winning and I suppose I am losing. Two old friends died this week. I saw them less frequently over the past decade or so, but when I was with them, I noticed that they seemed to have slowed down in almost every aspect of activity, both physical and mental.

In many ways, my life is becoming more lively and invigorating as I age. I rejoice in that. But when I hike or even stroll around my neighborhood, I realize how much my pace has slowed. There may only be a loose correlation with energy level and life span, but it worries me nonetheless.

Maybe I should hire a personal trainer and rededicate myself to vigorous exercise. Maybe I will sit back and enjoy the blessings I already have each day. Both are possible and not mutually exclusive, but…

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  1. Chuck Coolidge
    Chuck
    @Chuckles

    Just glad nobody here knows me personally, because I have had a fair number of friends die over the past two years.  Probably the most disturbing was because he just quit. Please, whatever you do – don’t stop!

    • #1
  2. Manny Coolidge
    Manny
    @Manny

    I hear you. I’ve noticed slowing down myself at 61. I got some great advice a couple of months ago by someone a year or two older than me. Whatever you want to do for the rest of your life, do some of it every day. Ones abilities don’t just fall off completely as you age as long as you’re doing it every day. It’s when you break away from activity that causes a drastic drop off. So if you want to still be able to do 30 pushups in old age, do a dozen every day. Sounds like reasonable advice. I just don’t know what to do every day that I want to be able to still do at 80. 

    • #2
  3. E. Kent Golding Moderator
    E. Kent Golding
    @EKentGolding

    I do either a cardio or a strength workout pretty much every day.    Usually,  I don’t push it very hard–just SOMETHING to maintain what I have.   I used to push it pretty hard, but kept injuring myself ( the mind and the will are teenage boy — the body is old man )  No longer looking for improvement, just maintenance.    I also use a trainer once a week.  The trainer is creative, and has me doing things I either wouldn’t think of or wouldn’t bother with on my own.

    • #3
  4. Michael Henry Member
    Michael Henry
    @MichaelHenry

    Well-said and written, Southern Pessimist. Another suggestion: Don’t let the old man in.

    • #4
  5. Arahant Member
    Arahant
    @Arahant

    Southern Pessimist: Maybe I should hire a personal trainer and rededicate myself to vigorous exercise.

    Get a kitten.

    • #5
  6. John H. Member
    John H.
    @JohnH

    Arahant (View Comment):

    Southern Pessimist: Maybe I should hire a personal trainer and rededicate myself to vigorous exercise.

    Get a kitten.

    Or resume helicopter lessons.

    • #6
  7. Arahant Member
    Arahant
    @Arahant

    John H. (View Comment):

    Arahant (View Comment):

    Southern Pessimist: Maybe I should hire a personal trainer and rededicate myself to vigorous exercise.

    Get a kitten.

    Or resume helicopter lessons.

    Kittens are a longer-term commitment, if you do the helicopter lessons correctly.

    • #7
  8. Chuck Coolidge
    Chuck
    @Chuckles

    Arahant (View Comment):

    Southern Pessimist: Maybe I should hire a personal trainer and rededicate myself to vigorous exercise.

    Get a kitten.

    Shibas work very well indeed.

    • #8
  9. Arahant Member
    Arahant
    @Arahant

    Chuck (View Comment):

    Arahant (View Comment):

    Southern Pessimist: Maybe I should hire a personal trainer and rededicate myself to vigorous exercise.

    Get a kitten.

    Shibas work very well indeed.

    Admittedly, dogs make better personal trainers than cats.

    • #9
  10. Annefy Member
    Annefy
    @Annefy

    Nice post. JY turns 65 in a few weeks (and with two new knees, is doing better physically than he has in years)

    But we’ve had a house guest for the past 10 days (ironically working here in Cali managing a part of Bed Bath and Beyond’s descent in bankruptcy)  He and JY have been friends since college (1979) and I’ve known him since 1981. I didn’t witness the college years, but the 80s had some pretty wild times with their mutual friend (who passed two years ago)

    JY and houseguest have been spending all their spare moments on the golf course; dinner conversation is mostly about the benefit of things like turmeric and ensuring it contains black pepper (I am mostly not paying attention. I’ll ask JY for the crib notes when I get as old as him, in six months)

    • #10
  11. Chuck Coolidge
    Chuck
    @Chuckles

    Annefy (View Comment):

    Nice post. JY turns 65 in a few weeks (and with two new knees, is doing better physically than he has in years)

    But we’ve had a house guest for the past 10 days (ironically working here in Cali managing a part of Bed Bath and Beyond’s descent in bankruptcy) He and JY have been friends since college (1979) and I’ve known him since 1981. I didn’t witness the college years, but the 80s had some pretty wild times with their mutual friend (who passed two years ago)

    JY and houseguest have been spending all their spare moments on the golf course; dinner conversation is mostly about the benefit of things like turmeric and ensuring it contains black pepper (I am mostly not paying attention. I’ll ask JY for the crib notes when I get as old as him, in six months)

    Lord willing, he’ll stay six months ahead

    • #11
  12. Southern Pessimist Member
    Southern Pessimist
    @SouthernPessimist

    I appreciate the comments above. I don’t know how kittens or helicopter lessons apply or what shibas are, but I am sure that they might make my uncertainties about aging better if I understood it.

    • #12
  13. Gossamer Cat Coolidge
    Gossamer Cat
    @GossamerCat

    Arahant (View Comment):

    Southern Pessimist: Maybe I should hire a personal trainer and rededicate myself to vigorous exercise.

    Get a kitten.

    I can vouch for that.  I just got two.  After losing my two cats last year, I thought I was done.  After I recovered a bit, I thought I might get another cat, but decided I should get older ones.  At 62, I had to do the math and confront the fact that I was heading into old age and might not survive my cats if I got younger ones.  But here I am due to circumstance with two kittens.  And just like that, I committed to the future.  I had not done that for a long time-the last few years have been one loss after another.  I’m thinking about retirement and it just seemed like it was not a time to rebuild but just accept growing older gracefully.  Kittens + exercise is the ticket. 

    • #13
  14. Southern Pessimist Member
    Southern Pessimist
    @SouthernPessimist

    Annefy, any conversation that centers around the benefits of tumeric or black pepper should only be about flavor. Life expectancy has nothing to do with the flavor of what we eat but flavor has everything to do with why we live.

    • #14
  15. Arahant Member
    Arahant
    @Arahant

    Southern Pessimist (View Comment):

    I appreciate the comments above. I don’t know how kittens or helicopter lessons apply or what shibas are, but I am sure that they might make my uncertainties about aging better if I understood it.

    They are things to help you keep young and commit to living a few more years. As for Shibas, Chuck was talking about Shiba Inu.

    • #15
  16. Annefy Member
    Annefy
    @Annefy

    Southern Pessimist (View Comment):

    Annefy, any conversation that centers around the benefits of tumeric or black pepper should only be about flavor. Life expectancy has nothing to do with the flavor of what we eat but flavor has everything to do with why we live.

    I hear that. I do believe I mentioned to the two gentlemen the other night that they were boring me stupid and I preferred the stories from 40 + years ago, that I’ve heard a thousand times,  about their college antics.

    That said, JY has been stealing some turmeric each morning; I predict he will weigh in with an opinion within the next couple of weeks. I also predict I won’t be listening …

    I dragged them both out for dinner and drinks on Friday night. I managed to dance with them both (not at the same time), drink too much, and fix the waitress up with son #2. Son #2 took some video of JY and I dancing; while pleased that I was having a good hair day, I was annoyed by his comment on Instagram: Looking good, but their knees will be complaining tomorrow.

    • #16
  17. Western Chauvinist Member
    Western Chauvinist
    @WesternChauvinist

    Arahant (View Comment):

    Southern Pessimist (View Comment):

    I appreciate the comments above. I don’t know how kittens or helicopter lessons apply or what shibas are, but I am sure that they might make my uncertainties about aging better if I understood it.

    They are things to help you keep young and commit to living a few more years. As for Shibas, Chuck was talking about Shiba Inu.

    Oh, dear, not a Shiba Inu!!! As a dog person, my (limited) experience is this is the most difficult to manage, wild breed you would have the misfortune of involving yourself with. Don’t do it. We just had a veterinarian friend and her sister the zookeeper for dinner the other night, and they had the same assessment when Shibas came up. For an easily managed doggie friend — Border Terrier. A favorite among the Brits and my new favorite breed.

    For your brain, take up piano playing. I’ve played since I was a kid (total amateur, but I read music and joined choir, too). I’m studying chords and practicing my finger exercises (Hanon). My piano teacher is very big on the brain science and it’s pretty tough to beat piano playing for giving your brain a workout. Two hands, two clefts to read, rhythm, key changes, etc. Good stuff. Her doctor says she doesn’t worry about her developing dementia, even though it runs in her family, because — piano.

    • #17
  18. Southern Pessimist Member
    Southern Pessimist
    @SouthernPessimist

    Annefy (View Comment):

    Southern Pessimist (View Comment):

    Annefy, any conversation that centers around the benefits of tumeric or black pepper should only be about flavor. Life expectancy has nothing to do with the flavor of what we eat but flavor has everything to do with why we live.

    I hear that. I do believe I mentioned to the two gentlemen the other night that they were boring me stupid and I preferred the stories from 40 + years ago, that I’ve heard a thousand times, about their college antics.

    That said, JY has been stealing some turmeric each morning; I predict he will weigh in with an opinion within the next couple of weeks. I also predict I won’t be listening …

    I dragged them both out for dinner and drinks on Friday night. I managed to dance with them both (not at the same time), drink too much, and fix the waitress up with son #2. Son #2 took some video of JY and I dancing; while pleased that I was having a good hair day, I was annoyed by his comment on Instagram: Looking good, but their knees will be complaining tomorrow.

    In the spirit of your honest but humorous comment, when you want to steal a little more tumeric in the morning, maybe you are closer to the bankruptcy point in life than you realize.

    • #18
  19. Chuck Coolidge
    Chuck
    @Chuckles

    Southern Pessimist (View Comment):

    Annefy, any conversation that centers around the benefits of tumeric or black pepper should only be about flavor. Life expectancy has nothing to do with the flavor of what we eat but flavor has everything to do with why we live.

    My doc did suggest Tylenol and turmeric for chronic back pain but to be honest after some months I’m pretty certain the only ones that benefit are the pill makers.

    • #19
  20. Manny Coolidge
    Manny
    @Manny

    Western Chauvinist (View Comment):

    Arahant (View Comment):

    Southern Pessimist (View Comment):

    I appreciate the comments above. I don’t know how kittens or helicopter lessons apply or what shibas are, but I am sure that they might make my uncertainties about aging better if I understood it.

    They are things to help you keep young and commit to living a few more years. As for Shibas, Chuck was talking about Shiba Inu.

    Oh, dear, not a Shiba Inu!!! As a dog person, my (limited) experience is this is the most difficult to manage, wild breed you would have the misfortune of involving yourself with. Don’t do it. We just had a veterinarian friend and her sister the zookeeper for dinner the other night, and they had the same assessment when Shibas came up. For an easily managed doggie friend — Border Terrier. A favorite among the Brits and my new favorite breed.

    For your brain, take up piano playing. I’ve played since I was a kid (total amateur, but I read music and joined choir, too). I’m studying chords and practicing my finger exercises (Hanon). My piano teacher is very big on the brain science and it’s pretty tough to beat piano playing for giving your brain a workout. Two hands, two clefts to read, rhythm, key changes, etc. Good stuff. Her doctor says she doesn’t worry about her developing dementia, even though it runs in her family, because — piano.

    Piano playing is an excellent idea.

    • #20
  21. Southern Pessimist Member
    Southern Pessimist
    @SouthernPessimist

    Arahant (View Comment):

    Southern Pessimist (View Comment):

    I appreciate the comments above. I don’t know how kittens or helicopter lessons apply or what shibas are, but I am sure that they might make my uncertainties about aging better if I understood it.

    They are things to help you keep young and commit to living a few more years. As for Shibas, Chuck was talking about Shiba Inu.

    Thanks for the link. As I age as gracefully as I can, I do try to be a Shiba Inu.

    • #21
  22. Chuck Coolidge
    Chuck
    @Chuckles

    Southern Pessimist (View Comment):

    Arahant (View Comment):

    Southern Pessimist (View Comment):

    I appreciate the comments above. I don’t know how kittens or helicopter lessons apply or what shibas are, but I am sure that they might make my uncertainties about aging better if I understood it.

    They are things to help you keep young and commit to living a few more years. As for Shibas, Chuck was talking about Shiba Inu.

    Thanks for the link. As I age as gracefully as I can, I do try to be a Shiba Inu.

    Sure hope you don’t shed as much.

    • #22
  23. Southern Pessimist Member
    Southern Pessimist
    @SouthernPessimist

    Manny (View Comment):

    Western Chauvinist (View Comment):

    Arahant (View Comment):

    Southern Pessimist (View Comment):

    I appreciate the comments above. I don’t know how kittens or helicopter lessons apply or what shibas are, but I am sure that they might make my uncertainties about aging better if I understood it.

    They are things to help you keep young and commit to living a few more years. As for Shibas, Chuck was talking about Shiba Inu.

    Oh, dear, not a Shiba Inu!!! As a dog person, my (limited) experience is this is the most difficult to manage, wild breed you would have the misfortune of involving yourself with. Don’t do it. We just had a veterinarian friend and her sister the zookeeper for dinner the other night, and they had the same assessment when Shibas came up. For an easily managed doggie friend — Border Terrier. A favorite among the Brits and my new favorite breed.

    For your brain, take up piano playing. I’ve played since I was a kid (total amateur, but I read music and joined choir, too). I’m studying chords and practicing my finger exercises (Hanon). My piano teacher is very big on the brain science and it’s pretty tough to beat piano playing for giving your brain a workout. Two hands, two clefts to read, rhythm, key changes, etc. Good stuff. Her doctor says she doesn’t worry about her developing dementia, even though it runs in her family, because — piano.

    Piano playing is an excellent idea.

    At my stage of life I doubt if piano playing is a good option. Sort of like buying ripe bananas. I don’t want to own, train or breed a Shiba Inu, but as an old man being a Shiba Inu is attractive.

    • #23
  24. Southern Pessimist Member
    Southern Pessimist
    @SouthernPessimist

    Chuck (View Comment):

    Southern Pessimist (View Comment):

    Arahant (View Comment):

    Southern Pessimist (View Comment):

    I appreciate the comments above. I don’t know how kittens or helicopter lessons apply or what shibas are, but I am sure that they might make my uncertainties about aging better if I understood it.

    They are things to help you keep young and commit to living a few more years. As for Shibas, Chuck was talking about Shiba Inu.

    Thanks for the link. As I age as gracefully as I can, I do try to be a Shiba Inu.

    Sure hope you don’t shed as much.

    I am shedding a lot these days but I am only occasionally docile.

    • #24
  25. Chuck Coolidge
    Chuck
    @Chuckles

    Southern Pessimist (View Comment):

    Chuck (View Comment):

    Southern Pessimist (View Comment):

    Arahant (View Comment):

    Southern Pessimist (View Comment):

    I appreciate the comments above. I don’t know how kittens or helicopter lessons apply or what shibas are, but I am sure that they might make my uncertainties about aging better if I understood it.

    They are things to help you keep young and commit to living a few more years. As for Shibas, Chuck was talking about Shiba Inu.

    Thanks for the link. As I age as gracefully as I can, I do try to be a Shiba Inu.

    Sure hope you don’t shed as much.

    I am shedding a lot these days but I am only occasionally docile.

    Inu it!

    • #25
  26. Percival Thatcher
    Percival
    @Percival

    Chuck (View Comment):

    Southern Pessimist (View Comment):

    Arahant (View Comment):

    Southern Pessimist (View Comment):

    I appreciate the comments above. I don’t know how kittens or helicopter lessons apply or what shibas are, but I am sure that they might make my uncertainties about aging better if I understood it.

    They are things to help you keep young and commit to living a few more years. As for Shibas, Chuck was talking about Shiba Inu.

    Thanks for the link. As I age as gracefully as I can, I do try to be a Shiba Inu.

    Sure hope you don’t shed as much.

    The shedding isn’t a problem. 

    Chasing the mailman is.

    • #26
  27. Western Chauvinist Member
    Western Chauvinist
    @WesternChauvinist

    Southern Pessimist (View Comment):
    At my stage of life I doubt if piano playing is a good option.

    It’s not the achievement of proficiency — it’s the effort that matters. 

    • #27
  28. Western Chauvinist Member
    Western Chauvinist
    @WesternChauvinist

    Besides, electric keyboards are far cheaper than a new dog. And they make amazing sounds even a Shiba Inu can’t replicate. . .

    • #28
  29. Chuck Coolidge
    Chuck
    @Chuckles

    Western Chauvinist (View Comment):

    Besides, electric keyboards are far cheaper than a new dog. And they make amazing sounds even a Shiba Inu can’t replicate. . .

    Shibas make a sound even an electric keyboard can’t replicate.

    • #29
  30. E. Kent Golding Moderator
    E. Kent Golding
    @EKentGolding

    Arahant (View Comment):

    Southern Pessimist (View Comment):

    I appreciate the comments above. I don’t know how kittens or helicopter lessons apply or what shibas are, but I am sure that they might make my uncertainties about aging better if I understood it.

    They are things to help you keep young and commit to living a few more years. As for Shibas, Chuck was talking about Shiba Inu.

    Stay away from the Meme Coins.   Get a dog instead.   Boxers have plenty of energy to keep you busy.

    • #30
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