Can We Please Have Rainbow-colored Snow?

 

I recently ran across this little gem of political correctness on the College Fix website. Apparently, Norwegian universities are just as keen to waste taxpayers’ money as their American counterparts. After all, how else can you explain why the University of Bergen is using a $1.2 million USD grant government grant to investigate how using white paint can encourage white supremacy?

The goal of this “study” is to discover if titanium oxide white paint, which was invented in Norway, has fostered the use of white “as a superior color.” The government-sponsored study seeks to examine the rise of titanium oxide white, apparently the whitest of white paint, through “historical, aesthetic, and critical lenses.”

The rationale for the program, called Norwhite by its organizers, sinks further into downright hallucinogenic behavior by stating that the program, which is actually offering academic fellowships to “study” this drivel, will investigate how using titanium white has “not only led to an aesthetic desire for white surfaces but was also connected to racist attitudes.”

The emptiness of Norwhite’s “research” agenda is shown up by two intriguing facts: First, the program’s leader, Dr. Ingrid Haaland of Bergen University, is shown wearing an incredibly white blouse in the photograph accompanying the College Fix article. The blouse is so bright that it could probably cause snow blindness. Second, the Norwhite program is partially funded by the companies Titania A/S and Kronos Titan, which mine titanium ore and produce titanium white, respectively. Seeing this version of corporate CYA, the old saying about the tiger eating you last popped into my head.

However, no matter how absurd the Norwhite project may appear to most people, it has alerted me to the potential dangers of other forms of whiteness.

For example, Is snow racist because it’s white?

Let’s delve deeper into this vitally important topic.

Are the Snows of Kilimanjaro less racist because they’re in Africa, as opposed to, let’s say, Swiss or Alaskan snow?

Then there’s the case of Greenland. Why isn’t Greenland green? Upon reflection, the answer is obvious: the green in Greenland is being oppressed by all that white racist snow lying on top of it! Could this be construed as racist eco-rape?

Nowadays, if people are diligent enough they can find creeping whiteness almost everywhere they look.

I’m an ex-pat living in South Korea. In the park, next door to my apartment complex many people walk their small, sometimes cute, dogs. A surprising number of these canines are white. Does this mean white supremacists are infiltrating South Korea in cooperation with North Korean saboteurs?

Most cars here are painted either white or black. Does this symbolize a silent racial struggle between white supremacists and the long-suppressed and noble people of color?

Finally, the whole Norwhite nonsense has reminded me of the late Frank Zappa’s 1974 album, Apostrophe, and the lyrics from one of its songs: “Watch out where the huskies go and don’t you eat that yellow snow. “ 

Dr. Haaland and her colleagues should stop with the yellow snow before they completely lose their woke stunted minds and wind up grifting even more money from Norwegian taxpayers. Maybe a couple of shots of aquavit, the fiery Scandinavian relative of vodka, would help clear their heads.

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  1. kedavis Coolidge
    kedavis
    @kedavis

    Michael G. Gallagher: Can We please have Rainbow-colored Snow?

    Maybe if you have some very strange urinary tract infections.

    • #1
  2. Dotorimuk Coolidge
    Dotorimuk
    @Dotorimuk

    I live not too far from you, Mr. Gallagher. (I’m in Seongnam.) Although I am white myself, seeing the racist white snow falling last week left me shaking with rage. I immediately cranked the old victrola and listened to Phil Ochs’ “White Boots Marching in a Yellow Land” and cried myself to sleep.

    • #2
  3. Nohaaj Coolidge
    Nohaaj
    @Nohaaj

    It is obvious that this pigment has chosen to forego it’s usual pronoun “di”.  It is already totes woke. 

    • #3
  4. Stad Coolidge
    Stad
    @Stad

    I used to enjoy seeing a beautiful rainbow in the sky.  Now rainbows make me sick to my stomach . . .

    • #4
  5. Michael G. Gallagher Coolidge
    Michael G. Gallagher
    @MichaelGallagher

    Dear @kedavis,

    Should the Norwegians go for 57 varieties, like Heinz, or merely 33 flavors, like Baskin & Robbins? I can’t even begin to imagine what die-hard members of the LGBT&%# crowd would think of this. A blizzard in San Franciso could lead to some very peculiar opinions showing up on local social media. 

    Personally, I’m holding out for Jameson Irish Whiskey snow cones.

    • #5
  6. Old Bathos Member
    Old Bathos
    @OldBathos

    The study itself is proof of white supremacy. To suck up resources for a “study” which will be auto-erogenous ideological crap spewed by narcissists while pretending to advance racial justice is a really white thing to do.  I am ashamed of my race.

    • #6
  7. DaveSchmidt Coolidge
    DaveSchmidt
    @DaveSchmidt

    Stad (View Comment):

    I used to enjoy seeing a beautiful rainbow in the sky. Now rainbows make me sick to my stomach . . .

    All children’s media programing and school curricula have been rainbowed. 

    • #7
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