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Area Man Suspects He’s a Diversity Hire
The other day it occurred to me that I’m a diversity hire. I know what you’re thinking: a white male diversity hire? I decided to run it past my husband but Chasten doesn’t like to hear about my workaday concerns when he’s trying to breastfeed the twins.
It’s really nagging me. On what possible basis could I be a diversity hire? Is it because I’m Anglican? But wasn’t Nixon-appointee John Volpe an Anglican? That would be like putting a second glazed in an assortment of doughnuts: what’s the point? They don’t think I’m a person of color, do they? But it can’t be that for the same reason as above: William Thaddeus Coleman Jr. was a person of color.
Talk about racist bridges!
My suspicions have only increased after my repeated attempts to get fired have failed, like the time I requested paternity leave from the president. I even called it that: “paternity leave.” Instead of laughing he said, “Sure, why not?” as if I’d suggested the White House be bathed in the colors of the LGBTQ+ flag or something. The next thing I know I’m spending two of my first nine months as Transportation Secretary stuck at home with two babies and the ol’ ball and chain.
It’s really starting to bother me because it never occurred to me that I wasn’t tapped for the same reason Kamala was: competence.
Published in Humor
Come on now. Pete just announced that NOTice to AirMen will henceforth be known as NOTice to Air Missions, thus striking a blow against systemic sexism. That’s some serious brainwork right there!
(The system ought to be known as NOt Transmitting Any Messages.)
Pete would never use the dead term “breastfeed.” Failure to use “chestfeed” could get you fired.
I wasn’t aware that commercial airlines had “missions.”
Pete is going to run for Senator in Michigan. I am curious to see how black voters in Michigan respond. Pete has a bad reputation for “depopulating” South Bend of black families when he was mayor. I don’t think he can win, because black Twitter doesn’t forget.
Make a joke involving
Pete ButtigiegPete BootyjudgePete ButterjugMayor Pete and electronic delivery of the new “mission” notices. Go ahead. I dare you.The Republican Party in Michigan is in disarray.
It’s Pete. He jabbers. He went on and on about “racist” bridges and overpasses earlier.
Michigan? South Bend is in Indiana. I don’t think Michiganders would appreciate a carpetbagger.
Well, if they’ll elect Jennifer Granholm, their standards can’t be very high.
His house is in SW Michigan, near the lake. That puts him in close proximity to the second (or 3rd, 4th or 5th) homes of the Chicago elite.
That is a very diplomatic way to put it.
Wears a suite and tie; no tats. Yep, a diversity hire.
No visible tattoos.
Black people don’t like Buttigieg because his name is a sideways pronunciation of Jigaboo.
Listen to Spencer Klavan’s theory that Pete is a fake gay, starting around 42:30.
That’s a lot to give up just to be mayor of South Bend and then Secretary of Transportation.
He was Mayor first. Then gay shortly before his second run.
Until you realize he’s been practicing talking like a politician in the mirror since he was 12.
Or he was gay first, but didn’t admit it if he thought it might cost him the mayoral election.
Which is Spencer’s thought. By the time his work was coming to fruition, white males were not wanted. What box could he still check? Black is laughed at. Trans takes real commitment. Homosexuality is lauded by the side he wants to be on.
Pete was a shoo in to be elected in his first campaign. The incombant mayor (a Democrat) was basically told he was done. The Notre Dame crowd were (and still are) enthusiastic about him. ALL the business Republican and Libertarian-leaning money supported him.
He “come out” during his re-election campaign. The timing was well orchestrated; after the primary and before the general election. The Republican opponent was not a credible candidate.
Doesn’t that mean pretending to be gay was unnecessary?
Or, if you are thinking about a path to the White House, how do you draw attention if you are just a plain vanilla Ivy League geek? I think the young Klavan is on to something.
The longer Pete is in the spotlight, more will come out.
Good one Mr D.
I heard somewhere the NOTAM system 1) failed due to a single corrupted data file and 2) that file contained all the name changes needed to eliminate “man” or “men” in the names of places.
Example: “Chapmanville, WV” had to be changed to “Chappersonville”. Which was very confusing… Probably just a rumor but who knows with this crowd! I just hope they stay away from aviation flight terms. How would someone “personeuver” a plane to land!
Pete moved to Traverse City to be near his husband’s family.
Did you know that Pete’s father was a Marxist professor?
Just heard that last week.
Pastor Pete is the “Peter Principle” personified.
That is near perfect.