Rest Easy, Ricochet

 

I decided to search my garage this morning to make sure there were no classified documents in my garage. To my great relief, I didn’t find any.

Unfortunately, the Corvette I was hoping to find in the garage wasn’t there.

I can also assure any number of miscreants and ne’er do wells I shredded my old police notebooks that I had to keep for seven years per state requirements a long time ago.

Published in Humor
This post was promoted to the Main Feed by a Ricochet Editor at the recommendation of Ricochet members. Like this post? Want to comment? Join Ricochet’s community of conservatives and be part of the conversation. Join Ricochet for Free.

There are 39 comments.

Become a member to join the conversation. Or sign in if you're already a member.
  1. Percival Thatcher
    Percival
    @Percival

    You have to be on your toes. People were always slipping classified documents into my briefcase while I wasn’t looking.

    • #1
  2. Arahant Member
    Arahant
    @Arahant

    Doug Watt: Unfortunately, the Corvette I was hoping to find in the garage wasn’t there.

    Me, too, man.

    • #2
  3. Arahant Member
    Arahant
    @Arahant

    Percival (View Comment):

    You have to be on your toes. People were always slipping classified documents into my briefcase while I wasn’t looking.

    Presidential material right here.

    • #3
  4. Ole Summers Member
    Ole Summers
    @OleSummers

    Your note here made me uneasy, Not having a garage I had assumed I was in the clear but then remembered I do have a 40 foot container with storage and files – so checked in just in case. I will continue to do so on a regular basis since it seems that such docs seem to have a mind of their own and deposit themselves at will. 

    I was able to review some 30 years of game plans as I checked thru the boxes – if anyone is curious as to what defense North Texas State was running in 1979, give me a call, I can help you out

    • #4
  5. Justin Other Lawyer Coolidge
    Justin Other Lawyer
    @DouglasMyers

    I’m also guessing that your team of lawyers have not told you not to ask about unclassified documents not in your neighbor’s garage.  What DO you have to hide?

    • #5
  6. Arahant Member
    Arahant
    @Arahant

    Ole Summers (View Comment):
    I will continue to do so on a regular basis since it seems that such docs seem to have a mind of their own and deposit themselves at will. 

    I blame Sandy Berger.

    • #6
  7. BDB Inactive
    BDB
    @BDB

    Arahant (View Comment):

    Ole Summers (View Comment):
    I will continue to do so on a regular basis since it seems that such docs seem to have a mind of their own and deposit themselves at will.

    I blame Sandy Berger.

    One handy burglar.

    • #7
  8. Douglas Pratt Coolidge
    Douglas Pratt
    @DouglasPratt

    Dang. My TS expired years ago but I had no idea my garage had to be a SCIF.

    • #8
  9. Percival Thatcher
    Percival
    @Percival

    Arahant (View Comment):

    Percival (View Comment):

    You have to be on your toes. People were always slipping classified documents into my briefcase while I wasn’t looking.

    Presidential material right here.

    I once had a notebook in which I had just completed some calculations taken by a bird colonel and classified on the spot above my level to know the answer anymore.

    If I had known the Federal Government was going to tuck it into the crate next to the one where they have the Ark of the Covenant, I would have used my good pen.

    • #9
  10. JosePluma, Local Man of Mystery Coolidge
    JosePluma, Local Man of Mystery
    @JosePluma

    Doug Watt:

    I can also assure any number of miscreants and ne’er do wells I shredded my old police notebooks that I had to keep for seven years per state requirements a long time ago.

    I still have mine for some reason. Good luck deciphering the handwriting in them. 

    • #10
  11. Steve Fast Member
    Steve Fast
    @SteveFast

    So you checked your garage, but what about locked cabinets or closets? Huh?

    • #11
  12. Django Member
    Django
    @Django

    Image

    • #12
  13. Jim McConnell Member
    Jim McConnell
    @JimMcConnell

    It ain’t funny!

    We can rest assured that our adversaries now have all of our secrets generated since Hillary lost he post as Secretary of State and the adversaries lost that direct line to our government operations and plans.

    It is past time we stopped laughing at Biden and his antics. He has been corrupt and incompetent his entire career, he has always put himself and his family above the interests of the nation he supposedly serves.

    Why should he be concerned  about protecting the secrets of a country he cares about only in terms of how he can personally profit from it?

    • #13
  14. Justin Other Lawyer Coolidge
    Justin Other Lawyer
    @DouglasMyers

    Jim McConnell (View Comment):

    It ain’t funny!

    We can rest assured that our adversaries now have all of our secrets generated since Hillary lost he post as Secretary of State and the adversaries lost that direct line to our government operations and plans.

    It is past time we stopped laughing at Biden and his antics. He has been corrupt and incompetent his entire career, he has always put himself and his family above the interests of the nation he supposedly serves.

    Why should he be concerned about protecting the secrets of a country he cares about only in terms of how he can personally profit from it?

    I hear you, but I think mockery is still in order in this case.  You are correct though that this must go beyond mockery.

    I do wonder if these documents were “found” as part of the Hunter Biden investigation.  I forget where I read it, but Hunter’s emails contained references to the think tank and the UPenn office.  I am not saying I think the documents are directly related to Hunter’s pay-for-play behavior (although they certainly could be), but rather that perhaps the feds served a subpoena on the President to turn over certain documents, thus causing the classified documents to be found.  That would be one explanation for why the President’s lawyers were the ones who found the stuff.

    Lots of questions to be answered.  I have little confidence in the people or the process involved, but the House might just do something worthwhile and press the matter, and the Trump-appointed DOJ lawyer* might actually do his job.  Time will tell.

    *Edit:  I see that a special counsel has been appointed–a partner from Gibson Dunn.  I know that firm employs some good folks, but no idea about this guy.  Hopefully he’s up to the task.

    • #14
  15. DonG (CAGW is a Scam) Coolidge
    DonG (CAGW is a Scam)
    @DonG

    What about a gas stove? 

    • #15
  16. Some Call Me ...Tim Coolidge
    Some Call Me ...Tim
    @SomeCallMeTim

    When I was the XO of a maintenance battalion, we were cited for having classified material adrift when the divisional G-2 (intelligence) did a routine after-hours inspection of our office spaces.  It turns out they found the three-ring binder in which my son kept his POGs (a 1980s thing about milk caps with characters on them).  I had made a cover for the binder that said stuff like “important”, “top secret”, and “hands off” on it. 

    We had to do a reply to the citation. 

    • #16
  17. Django Member
    Django
    @Django

    There’s really nothing rare about this sort of thing. IIRC, it was during the second Reagan or early in G. H. W.’s term that someone checked a briefcase full of classified documents at the curb before boarding the plane. [Skycap?] The briefcase was lost and never recovered.

    Back then, I heard through the grapevine that someone on Lawrence Walsh’s team was seen reading TS/SCI documents related to Iran/Contra on the airplane.

    As the old saying goes: Quod licet Iovi, non licet bovi.

    The View Peddles Outrageous Conspiracy Theory on Biden Classified Docs (townhall.com)

    • #17
  18. kedavis Coolidge
    kedavis
    @kedavis

    Doug Watt:

    I decided to search my garage this morning to make sure there were no classified documents in my garage. To my great relief, I didn’t find any.

    Unfortunately, the Corvette I was hoping to find in the garage wasn’t there.

     

    Gotta keep priorities in order!

     

    (Couple years old, but still useful…)

    • #18
  19. Michael Brehm Lincoln
    Michael Brehm
    @MichaelBrehm

    I doubt it’s just Trump and Biden. How much would you bet that the other ex-presidents have top secret materials ferreted away in their junk drawers next to some old ketchup packets?

    • #19
  20. Justin Other Lawyer Coolidge
    Justin Other Lawyer
    @DouglasMyers

    Michael Brehm (View Comment):

    I doubt it’s just Trump and Biden. How much would you bet that the other ex-presidents have top secret materials ferreted away in their junk drawers next to some old ketchup packets?

    I think you’re probably right, which is why it’s really important to know what documents were contained in both “finds”.  I suspect many/most are nothing special.  On the other hand, if someone squirreled away documents (say, intel on Hunter Biden’s activities/contacts in Ukraine and China), it might well be a bigger problem.

    • #20
  21. BDB Inactive
    BDB
    @BDB

    Michael Brehm (View Comment):

    I doubt it’s just Trump and Biden. How much would you bet that the other ex-presidents have top secret materials ferreted away in their junk drawers next to some old ketchup packets?

    I guarantee that it’s not limited to ex-Presidents either.  How many government officials have behaved the way EVERYBODY behaved a few decades ago, when the Cold War was over and Classified controls went to Hell?

    • #21
  22. Doug Watt Member
    Doug Watt
    @DougWatt

    Jim McConnell (View Comment):

    It ain’t funny!

    We can rest assured that our adversaries now have all of our secrets generated since Hillary lost he post as Secretary of State and the adversaries lost that direct line to our government operations and plans.

    It is past time we stopped laughing at Biden and his antics. He has been corrupt and incompetent his entire career, he has always put himself and his family above the interests of the nation he supposedly serves.

    Why should he be concerned about protecting the secrets of a country he cares about only in terms of how he can personally profit from it?

    Totally understandable, in my defense I will say I laugh because I can. I do try too not mock what I don’t understand, but what I do understand becomes an open season for mockery, and there is no bag limit.

    • #22
  23. WillowSpring Member
    WillowSpring
    @WillowSpring

    Percival (View Comment):
    I once had a notebook in which I had just completed some calculations taken by a bird colonel and classified on the spot above my level to know the answer anymore.

    Classification procedures are (or were back when I was subject to them) pretty stupid sometimes. 

    When I had a Top Secret clearance, but not the next level required, I would write project reports, give them to the cleared secretary who would type them up.  I was not allowed to proof read them, since I wasn’t yet cleared to that level.

    It was relatively important – I remember one report where “Adaptive Beam Forming” (in an Anti Sub warfare proposal) was turned into “Adaptive Bean Farming”!

     

    • #23
  24. Chris O Coolidge
    Chris O
    @ChrisO

    Some Call Me …Tim (View Comment):

    When I was the XO of a maintenance battalion, we were cited for having classified material adrift when the divisional G-2 (intelligence) did a routine after-hours inspection of our office spaces. It turns out they found the three-ring binder in which my son kept his POGs (a 1980s thing about milk caps with characters on them). I had made a cover for the binder that said stuff like “important”, “top secret”, and “hands off” on it.

    We had to do a reply to the citation.

    You mean, without laughter? I’m sure it didn’t seem funny at the time, but the reply…so many possibilities. Even in flat, official language I imagine it provoked a few smiles (after everything was cleared up).

    • #24
  25. Django Member
    Django
    @Django

    WillowSpring (View Comment):

    Percival (View Comment):
    I once had a notebook in which I had just completed some calculations taken by a bird colonel and classified on the spot above my level to know the answer anymore.

    Classification procedures are (or were back when I was subject to them) pretty stupid sometimes.

    When I had a Top Secret clearance, but not the next level required, I would write project reports, give them to the cleared secretary who would type them up. I was not allowed to proof read them, since I wasn’t yet cleared to that level.

    It was relatively important – I remember one report where “Adaptive Beam Forming” (in an Anti Sub warfare proposal) was turned into “Adaptive Bean Farming”!

     

    I am convinced that some things were over-classified in a clumsy attempt to protect the associated budgets. 

     

    • #25
  26. Manny Coolidge
    Manny
    @Manny

    Michael Brehm (View Comment):

    I doubt it’s just Trump and Biden. How much would you bet that the other ex-presidents have top secret materials ferreted away in their junk drawers next to some old ketchup packets?

    Hilary Clinton was the worst and probably did real damage to this country. 

    • #26
  27. Justin Other Lawyer Coolidge
    Justin Other Lawyer
    @DouglasMyers

    Manny (View Comment):

    Michael Brehm (View Comment):

    I doubt it’s just Trump and Biden. How much would you bet that the other ex-presidents have top secret materials ferreted away in their junk drawers next to some old ketchup packets?

    Hilary Clinton was the worst and probably did real damage to this country.

    To this NatSec neophyte, that was always my judgment. Her stuff was in real-time for an extended time. Foreign governments probably couldn’t believe what they had stumbled onto. In fact, that might be the only saving grace—it was so ham-handed that they probably thought it was fake. 

    • #27
  28. Manny Coolidge
    Manny
    @Manny

    Justin Other Lawyer (View Comment):

    Manny (View Comment):

    Michael Brehm (View Comment):

    I doubt it’s just Trump and Biden. How much would you bet that the other ex-presidents have top secret materials ferreted away in their junk drawers next to some old ketchup packets?

    Hilary Clinton was the worst and probably did real damage to this country.

    To this NatSec neophyte, that was always my judgment. Her stuff was in real-time for an extended time. Foreign governments probably couldn’t believe what they had stumbled onto. In fact, that might be the only saving grace—it was so ham-handed that they probably thought it was fake.

    Hers was on a hard drive. May have been exposed to the internet. 

    • #28
  29. Percival Thatcher
    Percival
    @Percival

    WillowSpring (View Comment):

    Percival (View Comment):
    I once had a notebook in which I had just completed some calculations taken by a bird colonel and classified on the spot above my level to know the answer anymore.

    Classification procedures are (or were back when I was subject to them) pretty stupid sometimes.

    When I had a Top Secret clearance, but not the next level required, I would write project reports, give them to the cleared secretary who would type them up. I was not allowed to proof read them, since I wasn’t yet cleared to that level.

    It was relatively important – I remember one report where “Adaptive Beam Forming” (in an Anti Sub warfare proposal) was turned into “Adaptive Bean Farming”!

     

    Navy beans → Great northern beans.

    • #29
  30. Justin Other Lawyer Coolidge
    Justin Other Lawyer
    @DouglasMyers

    Percival (View Comment):

    WillowSpring (View Comment):

    Percival (View Comment):
    I once had a notebook in which I had just completed some calculations taken by a bird colonel and classified on the spot above my level to know the answer anymore.

    Classification procedures are (or were back when I was subject to them) pretty stupid sometimes.

    When I had a Top Secret clearance, but not the next level required, I would write project reports, give them to the cleared secretary who would type them up. I was not allowed to proof read them, since I wasn’t yet cleared to that level.

    It was relatively important – I remember one report where “Adaptive Beam Forming” (in an Anti Sub warfare proposal) was turned into “Adaptive Bean Farming”!

    Navy beans → Great northern beans.

    This seems an apt place to insert an Irish/bean joke (Malarkey Joe Biden etc).

    Why did the Irishman only put 239 beans in the soup?

    One more and it would have been too-farty.

    • #30
Become a member to join the conversation. Or sign in if you're already a member.