The Emperor’s New Clothes, Updated

 

The noblemen who were to carry his train stooped low and reached for the floor as if they were picking up his mantle. Then they pretended to lift and hold it high. They didn’t dare admit they had nothing to hold.

So off went the Emperor in procession under his splendid canopy. Everyone in the streets and the windows said, “Oh, how fine are the Emperor’s new clothes! Don’t they fit him to perfection? And see his long train!” Nobody would confess that he couldn’t see anything, for that would prove him either unfit for his position, or a fool. No costume the Emperor had worn before was ever such a complete success.

A small child raised his finger, pointed at the emperor, and began to say, “He has no clo—” when he was grabbed from behind and a hand placed over his mouth by an odd-looking fellow.

“I had to intervene. The child is clearly violating community guidelines concerning the emperor’s clothing choices,” the odd figure said, not releasing the struggling child.

The emperor looked nervously to the side as he sensed the restlessness in the crowd.  His entourage of scribes and policemen glared at the crowd but the murmurs continued.

“My God! I really am naked, aren’t I?!” The emperor whispered to his nearest advisor.

Sensing a crisis about to unfold, the Court Scientist and Chief Expert stepped up from the emperor’s entourage and faced the crowd.

“I know what you think you see but are seeing it wrongly.  You were brought up to believe in a false dichotomy of nakedness versus being clothed and to make adverse judgments about nakedness.  Only when you realize that the absence of clothing is itself a sartorial choice, no different from selecting a scarf or pantaloons can you be free and awakened to the true nature of things. Nakedness is indeed a clothing ensemble like any other.”

With that, he threw his hat into the crowd and opened his shirt.  Some in the crowd cheered.  He did not disrobe further because it was a tad chilly.  Some in the crowd did disrobe and chastised others for not accepting the science of the matter and the authority of The Expert.

The child was never seen again as were other missing kids in the town.  They were rumored to have been taken to an island owned by a friend of the Emperor and the Expert but that is another story.

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  1. Justin Other Lawyer Coolidge
    Justin Other Lawyer
    @DouglasMyers

    They were rumored to have been taken to an island owned by a friend of the Emperor and the Expert but that is another story.

    That took a dark turn.

    • #1
  2. Gary Robbins Member
    Gary Robbins
    @GaryRobbins

    A great and timely fable.

    You are speaking about Trump’s Big Lie and his insistence that he really won the 2020 election and Election Deniers like Kari Lake and Blake Masters who insist that Trump won, aren’t you?

    • #2
  3. Old Bathos Moderator
    Old Bathos
    @OldBathos

    Gary Robbins (View Comment):

    A great and timely fable.

    You are speaking about Trump’s Big Lie and his insistence that he really won the 2020 election and Election Deniers like Kari Lake and Blake Masters who insist that Trump won, aren’t you?

    That did not enter into my thinking.  It’s pretty nice here outside the bubble.  Join us.

    • #3
  4. Old Bathos Moderator
    Old Bathos
    @OldBathos

    Justin Other Lawyer (View Comment):

    They were rumored to have been taken to an island owned by a friend of the Emperor and the Expert but that is another story.

    That took a dark turn.

    Hans Christian Anderson and the Brothers Grimm did not paint a rosy child’s view of the world either.  

    • #4
  5. Gary Robbins Member
    Gary Robbins
    @GaryRobbins

    Old Bathos (View Comment):

    Gary Robbins (View Comment):

    A great and timely fable.

    You are speaking about Trump’s Big Lie and his insistence that he really won the 2020 election and Election Deniers like Kari Lake and Blake Masters who insist that Trump won, aren’t you?

    That did not enter into my thinking. It’s pretty nice here outside the bubble. Join us.

    I wish you all the best going after the Biology Deniers.  

    • #5
  6. Justin Other Lawyer Coolidge
    Justin Other Lawyer
    @DouglasMyers

    Old Bathos (View Comment):

    Justin Other Lawyer (View Comment):

    They were rumored to have been taken to an island owned by a friend of the Emperor and the Expert but that is another story.

    That took a dark turn.

    Hans Christian Anderson and the Brothers Grimm did not paint a rosy child’s view of the world either.

    Agreed.  My particular favorite is Heinrich Hoffman’s Struwwelpeter.

    I admit it–we scarred several of our children with this story when they were young.  Thankfully they’re grown now and show only minimal signs of trauma.

    • #6
  7. Old Bathos Moderator
    Old Bathos
    @OldBathos

    Gary Robbins (View Comment):

    Old Bathos (View Comment):

    Gary Robbins (View Comment):

    A great and timely fable.

    You are speaking about Trump’s Big Lie and his insistence that he really won the 2020 election and Election Deniers like Kari Lake and Blake Masters who insist that Trump won, aren’t you?

    That did not enter into my thinking. It’s pretty nice here outside the bubble. Join us.

    I wish you all the best going after the Biology Deniers.

    Don’t need to.  Just be patient and let Darwin handle it.

    • #7
  8. Gary Robbins Member
    Gary Robbins
    @GaryRobbins

    Old Bathos (View Comment):

    Gary Robbins (View Comment):

    Old Bathos (View Comment):

    Gary Robbins (View Comment):

    A great and timely fable.

    You are speaking about Trump’s Big Lie and his insistence that he really won the 2020 election and Election Deniers like Kari Lake and Blake Masters who insist that Trump won, aren’t you?

    That did not enter into my thinking. It’s pretty nice here outside the bubble. Join us.

    I wish you all the best going after the Biology Deniers.

    Don’t need to. Just be patient and let Darwin handle it.

    It will be a brutal fact of life that science just can’t fashion a penis out of a vagina, nor a vagina out of a penis.  But ignoring that is like going sunbathing outside in Minnesota in the winter, or playing golf in Arizona in the summer.  Reality intrudes.

    • #8
  9. Chuck Thatcher
    Chuck
    @Chuckles

    Finland. 1982. January.  Sauna. Alcohol. Jumping buck naked into icy cold water. More alcohol.

    • #9
  10. MarciN Member
    MarciN
    @MarciN

    Gary Robbins (View Comment):
    Election Deniers

    You should change this to “people who continue to have questions concerning the official election results.” That would prevent people from being targeted by the Democrats.

    • #10
  11. Hang On Member
    Hang On
    @HangOn

    MarciN (View Comment):

    Gary Robbins (View Comment):
    Election Deniers

    You should change this to “people who continue to have questions concerning the official election results.” That would prevent people from being targeted by the Democrats.

    He should change nothing. He is a friend of the American Stasi.

    • #11
  12. She Member
    She
    @She

    Justin Other Lawyer (View Comment):

    Old Bathos (View Comment):

    Justin Other Lawyer (View Comment):

    They were rumored to have been taken to an island owned by a friend of the Emperor and the Expert but that is another story.

    That took a dark turn.

    Hans Christian Anderson and the Brothers Grimm did not paint a rosy child’s view of the world either.

    Agreed. My particular favorite is Heinrich Hoffman’s Struwwelpeter.

    I admit it–we scarred several of our children with this story when they were young. Thankfully they’re grown now and show only minimal signs of trauma.

    I know no person who was scarred by  hearing such stories as a child, just as I know no child who’s been scarred by tales of the Brothers Grimm and the story of how the children shoved the wicked witch into the oven to burn to death in the Tale of Hansel and Gretel. So perish all the enemies of what’s good in the world. 

    Children, perhaps even more than adults, recognize how right it is to punish evil doings.  And they sometimes respond with glee.  (I’m reminded of the time that Mr. She and I took the kids to see Gremlins when it first came out (mid 1980s or so).  The kids loved it.  They cheered when “Mom” stuck the annoying and destructive little so-and-so in the blender and pressed the switch.  They couldn’t wait for the next come-uppance of the evil-doers.)

    But, many of the parents in the audience were horrified.  They grabbed their wailing kids by the hand and stalked out.

    The rest of us stayed for the very satisfying rest of the movie.

    I could have sworn I wrote a post here about how much I loved Strewwelpeter as a child, and what a salutary effect the verses have had on me through the years, yea even unto the present day.  Unfortunately, it was a very personal post I wrote on my own blog.  And here’s the link.

    Negative examples of how to behave abound.  All we can do is recognize them and try to teach others why they’re imporatant.

    • #12
  13. She Member
    She
    @She

    MarciN (View Comment):

    Gary Robbins (View Comment):
    Election Deniers

    You should change this to “people who continue to have questions concerning the official election results.” That would prevent people from being targeted by the Democrats.

    Good luck with that.  Not nearly enough Germanic Uppercase Letters in your version which should otherwise be rendered something like: “People who continue to have Questions concerning the Official Election Results.” 

    As  a person who’s spent much of her life in opposition to the rather precious practice, I suggest that moving away from it may render one’s opinions, if not more acceptable, as least less obnoxious.

    Just sayin’

     

    • #13
  14. Justin Other Lawyer Coolidge
    Justin Other Lawyer
    @DouglasMyers

    She (View Comment):

    Justin Other Lawyer (View Comment):

    Old Bathos (View Comment):

    Justin Other Lawyer (View Comment):

    They were rumored to have been taken to an island owned by a friend of the Emperor and the Expert but that is another story.

    That took a dark turn.

    Hans Christian Anderson and the Brothers Grimm did not paint a rosy child’s view of the world either.

    Agreed. My particular favorite is Heinrich Hoffman’s Struwwelpeter.

    I admit it–we scarred several of our children with this story when they were young. Thankfully they’re grown now and show only minimal signs of trauma.

    I know no person who was scarred by hearing such stories as a child, just as I know no child who’s been scarred by tales of the Brothers Grimm and the story of how the children shoved the wicked witch into the oven to burn to death in the Tale of Hansel and Gretel. So perish all the enemies of what’s good in the world.

    Children, perhaps even more than adults, recognize how right it is to punish evil doings. And they sometimes respond with glee. (I’m reminded of the time that Mr. She and I took the kids to see Gremlins when it first came out (mid 1980s or so). The kids loved it. They cheered when “Mom” stuck the annoying and destructive little so-and-so in the blender and pressed the switch. They couldn’t wait for the next come-uppance of the evil-doers.)

    But, many of the parents in the audience were horrified. They grabbed their wailing kids by the hand and stalked out.

    The rest of us stayed for the very satisfying rest of the movie.

    I could have sworn I wrote a post here about how much I loved Strewwelpeter as a child, and what a salutary effect the verses have had on me through the years, yea even unto the present day. Unfortunately, it was a very personal post I wrote on my own blog. And here’s the link.

    Negative examples of how to behave abound. All we can do is recognize them and try to teach others why they’re imporatant.

    Thank you for sharing that link.  Lovely.

    • #14
  15. MarciN Member
    MarciN
    @MarciN

    She (View Comment):

    MarciN (View Comment):

    Gary Robbins (View Comment):
    Election Deniers

    You should change this to “people who continue to have questions concerning the official election results.” That would prevent people from being targeted by the Democrats.

    Good luck with that. Not nearly enough Germanic Uppercase Letters in your version which should otherwise be rendered something like: “People who continue to have Questions concerning the Official Election Results.”

    As a person who’s spent much of her life in opposition to the rather precious practice, I suggest that moving away from it may render one’s opinions, if not more acceptable, as least less obnoxious.

    Just sayin’

    I don’t understand the second paragraph. What is the “precious practice”? Using abbreviations? I assume so. :-)

    • #15
  16. She Member
    She
    @She

    MarciN (View Comment):

    She (View Comment):

    MarciN (View Comment):

    Gary Robbins (View Comment):
    Election Deniers

    You should change this to “people who continue to have questions concerning the official election results.” That would prevent people from being targeted by the Democrats.

    Good luck with that. Not nearly enough Germanic Uppercase Letters in your version which should otherwise be rendered something like: “People who continue to have Questions concerning the Official Election Results.”

    As a person who’s spent much of her life in opposition to the rather precious practice, I suggest that moving away from it may render one’s opinions, if not more acceptable, as least less obnoxious.

    Just sayin’

     

    I don’t understand the second paragraph. What is the “precious practice”? Using abbreviations? I assume so. Which means I don’t understand “moving away from it”? I assume you mean questioning the election? But I’m not sure. :-)

    I think the election integrity issues matter enormously because, like our NAFTA unbalanced-trade agreements, these issues have been around for a long time. Trump is right to insist that it is time to confront these issues and fix our systems. Trump, as usual, is just the noisy wheel here. If the government wants the support of the American people for its actions, it needs to have a credible election process in place. I like his ideas on how to fix these voting systems very much.

    No.  What I object to (not all that strenuously, but mostly with some amusement) has nothing to do with actual philosophical argument.  It’s merely the other party’s insistence on egregious capitalization, in order to (one supposes) imbue the argument with some sort of validity.  Thus:

    “Election Denier”

    “Trump’s Big Lie”

    “Border Deniers”

    “Biology Denier” 

    “Fraud Denier”

    “Mainstream Republicans”

    “Mainstream Democrats”

    “Republican Primary”

    “Election Illegality Denier”

    “Strong Opposition”

    And so on.

    Really, all that much, it matters not.  But it’s frowned upon in English, which doesn’t feel the need, and if the only way one feels that one can assume a rhetorical advantage is to assume Capital Letters in the furtherance of one’s aims, then, quite sad.

     

     

     

    • #16
  17. Gary Robbins Member
    Gary Robbins
    @GaryRobbins

    She (View Comment):

    MarciN (View Comment):

    She (View Comment):

    MarciN (View Comment):

    Gary Robbins (View Comment):
    Election Deniers

    You should change this to “people who continue to have questions concerning the official election results.” That would prevent people from being targeted by the Democrats.

    Good luck with that. Not nearly enough Germanic Uppercase Letters in your version which should otherwise be rendered something like: “People who continue to have Questions concerning the Official Election Results.”

    As a person who’s spent much of her life in opposition to the rather precious practice, I suggest that moving away from it may render one’s opinions, if not more acceptable, as least less obnoxious.

    Just sayin’

     

    I don’t understand the second paragraph. What is the “precious practice”? Using abbreviations? I assume so. Which means I don’t understand “moving away from it”? I assume you mean questioning the election? But I’m not sure. :-)

    I think the election integrity issues matter enormously because, like our NAFTA unbalanced-trade agreements, these issues have been around for a long time. Trump is right to insist that it is time to confront these issues and fix our systems. Trump, as usual, is just the noisy wheel here. If the government wants the support of the American people for its actions, it needs to have a credible election process in place. I like his ideas on how to fix these voting systems very much.

    No. What I object to (not all that strenuously, but mostly with some amusement) has nothing to do with actual philosophical argument. It’s merely the other party’s insistence on egregious capitalization, in order to (one supposes) imbue the argument with some sort of validity. Thus:

    “Election Denier”

    “Trump’s Big Lie”

    “Border Deniers”

    “Biology Denier”

    “Fraud Denier”

    “Mainstream Republicans”

    “Mainstream Democrats”

    “Republican Primary”

    “Election Illegality Denier”

    “Strong Opposition”

    And so on.

    Really, all that much, it matters not. But it’s frowned upon in English, which doesn’t feel the need, and if the only way one feels that one can assume a rhetorical advantage is to assume Capital Letters in the furtherance of one’s aims, then, quite sad.

    Please do not hijack this post.  I withdrew from commenting out of respect for Old Bathos.  Would you be willing to do the same?

    • #17
  18. She Member
    She
    @She

    Gary Robbins (View Comment):
    Please do not hijack this post.  I withdrew from commenting out of respect for Old Bathos.  Would you be willing to do the same?

    Oh, FPS.  For you to accuse me of “hijacking” a post, given our relative contributions, you and me, to specific posts over the years is laughable.

    As is your pretense that–somehow–my factual and linguistically supportable comments on this post demonstrate a lack of respect for  Old Bathos.

    Gary Robbins (View Comment):
    I withdrew from commenting out of respect for Old Bathos. 

    Really?  

    I won’t insult you by providing the dictionary definition of what “withdrew from commenting” actually means.  I’ll merely note that–demonstrably–you’re still here.  And I won’t animadvert on the ensuing dissonance that results from what you SAY you’ve done, versus what you actually DO.

    If you are not willing to address the facts presented to you, as they relate to your presence here,  please step aside.  And–a word of well-meaning advice–I suggest you drop the Germanic capitalization and self-importance it implies, in your future posts and comments.  It’s unnecessary, it doesn’t age well, and it works against your arguments because people cannot help but notice it.

    Not just my opinion.  Just something I learned as a freshman in college.  Half a century ago.

    • #18
  19. RushBabe49 Thatcher
    RushBabe49
    @RushBabe49

    Please, everyone, hie on over to the Member Feed and read Vince G’s post on election vulnerabilities.

    • #19
  20. Columbo Member
    Columbo
    @Columbo

    Old Bathos (View Comment):

    Gary Robbins (View Comment):

    Old Bathos (View Comment):

    Gary Robbins (View Comment):

    A great and timely fable.

    You are speaking about Trump’s Big Lie and his insistence that he really won the 2020 election and Election Deniers like Kari Lake and Blake Masters who insist that Trump won, aren’t you?

    That did not enter into my thinking. It’s pretty nice here outside the bubble. Join us.

    I wish you all the best going after the Biology Deniers.

    Don’t need to. Just be patient and let Darwin handle it.

    Yes.

    God is always understanding.

    People are sometimes understanding.

    Nature is never understanding.

    • #20
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