Beer and Loathing in Minocqua

 

It’s been a while since I’ve written a post in this style because “leftists at craft breweries” is not exactly a shocking new development, and I’m generally able to shrug these things off. When it’s all you see, you sort of get used to it.

That said, @dnewlander brought this one to my attention a couple of days ago, and this one did hit me hard. If I had to guess why, it’s because I actually know this place and therefore it hits closer to home for me. And so like a song that won’t get out of your head, I’m writing a post. If it doesn’t get it out of my head I can at least share the misery.

Take a look at this masterpiece of jackassery:

Before I start, for those of you who aren’t familiar which I expect is most of you, Minocqua is a tourist haven/summer house destination for FIBs* in northern Wisconsin.

Here’s a bit from their website:

Located in Minocqua Wisconsin, MBC started making #progressivebeer after closing our brewpub because Donald Trump played politics with Covid-19 and Mitch McConnell let restaurants twist in the wind.

Yes, because they were the only ones, it was just all the Democrats doing it were doing things you liked, so it wasn’t “politics”.

All right, let’s break it down.

“We’re already annoyed by all the kvetching about gas prices.”

I don’t know how long they’ve been in operation, but I lived in the area for more than half my life and it’s been a pretty constant theme the whole time. Not only that, it’s a big empty area on the map. You’re gonna have to worry about it if you want to get anywhere.

“If you’re gonna regurgitate Fox News and blame your president for making gas prices high, do it with a little flair!”

I’ve watched about half an hour of Fox News over the past couple of years. I don’t need them to tell me that gas prices have gone crazy. I can see it.

“We suggest listening to Mozart. Copy the way he composed variations on a theme instead of playing the same worn-out melody over and over.”

You lead with a Fox News hit and you’re complaining about worn-out themes? Mr. Pot, have you met Mr. Kettle?

“Stop snowmobiling altogether and go cross-country skiing instead.”

Well, the good news is if I’m going to do that I’ve got a lot more options available to me. I might not even have to go to Minocqua.

“Once you’ve given up motorsports, you won’t need a gas-guzzling truck to haul your machines around anymore.

I think this is what really got me. You’re in a place where people drive trucks for actual use and yet you still mock them.

“Get an electric Subaru to carry your skis.”

Not content with being smug jerks, you have to be stereotypical too? Maybe when I have confidence that the battery won’t die in -30 degree weather, then I’ll think about it. Or when there are actually enough people to support a charging station. Or when I’m not worried about the vehicle range allowing me to actually get anywhere.

“If you insist on the truck, take the Trump flag down…it shows the world you’ve got “low mileage” in other “performance” categories as well.j

What was that about “variations on a theme” again?

“After you’ve saved all that money on gas, treat yourself to a relatively inexpensive can of Kamala stout. It’ll get you almost as buzzed as three cans of Bud Light.”

Point 1: If you had been bold enough to tell me that it’s what she has before she has any speaking to do, I’d be convinced of its effectiveness.

Point 2: They got a four-pack at $14.99. I see Bud Light at $19.99 for a 30-rack. Since the Kamala stout is in a pint can, three of them is equal to four 12-oz. Bud Lights. By my reckoning, it looks like I can get slightly over 16 cans of Bud Light for the same price.

Cheers to economizing in the Northwoods this weekend!

Well, you convinced me. I guess I’ll stay home and have a Bud Light or three.

*If you know, you know.

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  1. Arahant Member
    Arahant
    @Arahant

    Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw: Point 1: If you had been bold enough to tell me that it’s what she has before she has any speaking to do, I’d be convinced of its effectiveness.

    That’s the best line.

    • #31
  2. Henry Castaigne Member
    Henry Castaigne
    @HenryCastaigne

    The soul of man needs to hate.

    • #32
  3. DrewInWisconsin, Ope! Member
    DrewInWisconsin, Ope!
    @DrewInWisconsin

    If I read their website correctly, they aren’t blaming Trump or McConnell for shutting them down, they’re proudly stating that they shut themselves down. Seems like they’re upset that they weren’t shut down.

    So they virtue signaled by closing their Brew Pub.

    Good goin’ man! Throughout the site they repeatedly blame Republicans for not shutting the state down harder. Apparently we were supposed to destroy our economy and then pass a huge spending bill to try to bail ourselves out.

    The site really has to be seen to be appreciated for its . . . weirdness.

    “Biden Beer” is described as “inoffensive, especially to women.”

    I can’t even. I want to even, but I can’t.

    They also encourage “dark money” donations for Democrats.

     

    • #33
  4. db25db Inactive
    db25db
    @db25db

    HankRhody Freelance Philosopher (View Comment):

    Judge Mental (View Comment):

    db25db (View Comment):

    Kamala Stout. Warning: Makes you burst into spontaneous uncontrollable laughter during extremely awkward moments.

    Followed by gibberish.

    So… it’s beer?

    or bong water

    • #34
  5. DrewInWisconsin, Ope! Member
    DrewInWisconsin, Ope!
    @DrewInWisconsin

    The real question is whether the Minocqua Brewing Company has weighed in on the Russia/Ukraine war.

    I mean, the Mustard Museum in Mount Horeb is taking a hard stand!

    • #35
  6. Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw Member
    Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw
    @MattBalzer

    DrewInWisconsin, Ope! (View Comment):
    I mean, the Mustard Museum in Mount Horeb is taking a hard stand!

    Are they bringing in any Ukrainian mustards?

    • #36
  7. DrewInWisconsin, Ope! Member
    DrewInWisconsin, Ope!
    @DrewInWisconsin

    Oh my lord. What a bunch of whiners.

    https://www.facebook.com/MBCBrews/posts/10161550809409307

     

    • #37
  8. Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw Member
    Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw
    @MattBalzer

    DrewInWisconsin, Ope! (View Comment):

    Oh my lord. What a bunch of whiners.

    https://www.facebook.com/MBCBrews/posts/10161550809409307

     

    They’re gonna drag Minocqua out of the old dark ages and into a newer shinier dark age.

    • #38
  9. Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw Member
    Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw
    @MattBalzer

    Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw (View Comment):

    DrewInWisconsin, Ope! (View Comment):

    Oh my lord. What a bunch of whiners.

    https://www.facebook.com/MBCBrews/posts/10161550809409307

     

    They’re gonna drag Minocqua out of the old dark ages and into a newer shinier dark age.

    Speaking of things needing a line by line rebuttal, the sign in that link.

    • #39
  10. DrewInWisconsin, Ope! Member
    DrewInWisconsin, Ope!
    @DrewInWisconsin

    Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw (View Comment):

    Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw (View Comment):

    DrewInWisconsin, Ope! (View Comment):

    Oh my lord. What a bunch of whiners.

    https://www.facebook.com/MBCBrews/posts/10161550809409307

     

    They’re gonna drag Minocqua out of the old dark ages and into a newer shinier dark age.

    Speaking of things needing a line by line rebuttal, the sign in that link.

    According to a comment under that post, they’re not even located in Minocqua anymore. But they’re trying to reopen in Minocqua, and whining that the locals are making it too difficult for them.

    If I was the locals I’d slow-walk any permits if not outright deny them. Sorry, we don’t want a local business who insults the locals at every opportunity.

    • #40
  11. Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw Member
    Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw
    @MattBalzer

    DrewInWisconsin, Ope! (View Comment):

    Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw (View Comment):

    Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw (View Comment):

    DrewInWisconsin, Ope! (View Comment):

    Oh my lord. What a bunch of whiners.

    https://www.facebook.com/MBCBrews/posts/10161550809409307

     

    They’re gonna drag Minocqua out of the old dark ages and into a newer shinier dark age.

    Speaking of things needing a line by line rebuttal, the sign in that link.

    According to a comment under that post, they’re not even located in Minocqua anymore. But they’re trying to reopen in Minocqua, and whining that the locals are making it too difficult for them.

    As I understand it he sold the pub location and just has a brewery, now he’s trying to reopen a pub.

    If I was the locals I’d slow-walk any permits if not outright deny them. Sorry, we don’t want a local business who insults the locals at every opportunity.

    Yeah, I just can’t understand why his “be a smug jerk” campaign isn’t winning hearts and minds.

    • #41
  12. Henry Castaigne Member
    Henry Castaigne
    @HenryCastaigne

    I am worried that no one is trying to convince the other side of anything anymore.Why can’t this dude watch Fox News and then argue that Fox news arguments are incorrect.

    • #42
  13. Hoyacon Member
    Hoyacon
    @Hoyacon

    Henry Castaigne (View Comment):

    I am worried that no one is trying to convince the other side of anything anymore.Why can’t this dude watch Fox News and then argue that Fox news arguments are incorrect.

    That ship sailed before there was a Fox News.

    • #43
  14. Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw Member
    Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw
    @MattBalzer

    Henry Castaigne (View Comment):

    I am worried that no one is trying to convince the other side of anything anymore.Why can’t this dude watch Fox News and then argue that Fox news arguments are incorrect.

    Because he doesn’t actually dispute it, he just doesn’t want people blaming Biden for it.

    • #44
  15. Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw Member
    Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw
    @MattBalzer

    Hoyacon (View Comment):

    Henry Castaigne (View Comment):

    I am worried that no one is trying to convince the other side of anything anymore.Why can’t this dude watch Fox News and then argue that Fox news arguments are incorrect.

    That ship sailed before there was a Fox News.

    What did they use before Fox? Rush?

    • #45
  16. Henry Castaigne Member
    Henry Castaigne
    @HenryCastaigne

    Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw (View Comment):

    Hoyacon (View Comment):

    Henry Castaigne (View Comment):

    I am worried that no one is trying to convince the other side of anything anymore.Why can’t this dude watch Fox News and then argue that Fox news arguments are incorrect.

    That ship sailed before there was a Fox News.

    What did they use before Fox? Rush?

    They never made arguments about why Rush Limbaugh was wrong did they. 

    • #46
  17. TheRightNurse Member
    TheRightNurse
    @TheRightNurse

    DrewInWisconsin, Ope! (View Comment):

    Oh my lord. What a bunch of whiners.

    https://www.facebook.com/MBCBrews/posts/10161550809409307

     

    Guess it is time for me to buy a few hundred of these and post them around/on their property.

    Yard Sign: In this house we believe that simplistic platitudes image 2

    • #47
  18. Percival Thatcher
    Percival
    @Percival

    Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw (View Comment):

    DrewInWisconsin, Ope! (View Comment):

    Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw (View Comment):

    Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw (View Comment):

    DrewInWisconsin, Ope! (View Comment):

    Oh my lord. What a bunch of whiners.

    https://www.facebook.com/MBCBrews/posts/10161550809409307

     

    They’re gonna drag Minocqua out of the old dark ages and into a newer shinier dark age.

    Speaking of things needing a line by line rebuttal, the sign in that link.

    According to a comment under that post, they’re not even located in Minocqua anymore. But they’re trying to reopen in Minocqua, and whining that the locals are making it too difficult for them.

    As I understand it he sold the pub location and just has a brewery, now he’s trying to reopen a pub.

    If I was the locals I’d slow-walk any permits if not outright deny them. Sorry, we don’t want a local business who insults the locals at every opportunity.

    Yeah, I just can’t understand why his “be a smug jerk” campaign isn’t winning hearts and minds.

    He should aim for a joint in the Peoples’ Republic of Madison.

    • #48
  19. Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw Member
    Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw
    @MattBalzer

    Percival (View Comment):

    Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw (View Comment):

    DrewInWisconsin, Ope! (View Comment):

    Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw (View Comment):

    Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw (View Comment):

    DrewInWisconsin, Ope! (View Comment):

    Oh my lord. What a bunch of whiners.

    https://www.facebook.com/MBCBrews/posts/10161550809409307

     

    They’re gonna drag Minocqua out of the old dark ages and into a newer shinier dark age.

    Speaking of things needing a line by line rebuttal, the sign in that link.

    According to a comment under that post, they’re not even located in Minocqua anymore. But they’re trying to reopen in Minocqua, and whining that the locals are making it too difficult for them.

    As I understand it he sold the pub location and just has a brewery, now he’s trying to reopen a pub.

    If I was the locals I’d slow-walk any permits if not outright deny them. Sorry, we don’t want a local business who insults the locals at every opportunity.

    Yeah, I just can’t understand why his “be a smug jerk” campaign isn’t winning hearts and minds.

    He should aim for a joint in the Peoples’ Republic of Madison.

    Hipster beer sold with a smug attitude in Madison? Talk about your saturated markets.

    • #49
  20. Gary McVey Contributor
    Gary McVey
    @GaryMcVey

    An excellent post. Glad to see it zoom past 1000 page views, and even in a week full of posts, it’s still #5 on the Main Feed. 

    • #50
  21. Percival Thatcher
    Percival
    @Percival

    Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw (View Comment):

    Percival (View Comment):

    Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw (View Comment):

    DrewInWisconsin, Ope! (View Comment):

    Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw (View Comment):

    Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw (View Comment):

    DrewInWisconsin, Ope! (View Comment):

    Oh my lord. What a bunch of whiners.

    https://www.facebook.com/MBCBrews/posts/10161550809409307

     

    They’re gonna drag Minocqua out of the old dark ages and into a newer shinier dark age.

    Speaking of things needing a line by line rebuttal, the sign in that link.

    According to a comment under that post, they’re not even located in Minocqua anymore. But they’re trying to reopen in Minocqua, and whining that the locals are making it too difficult for them.

    As I understand it he sold the pub location and just has a brewery, now he’s trying to reopen a pub.

    If I was the locals I’d slow-walk any permits if not outright deny them. Sorry, we don’t want a local business who insults the locals at every opportunity.

    Yeah, I just can’t understand why his “be a smug jerk” campaign isn’t winning hearts and minds.

    He should aim for a joint in the Peoples’ Republic of Madison.

    Hipster beer sold with a smug attitude in Madison? Talk about your saturated markets.

    This guy is talented. He can out-smug the field.

    • #51
  22. Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw Member
    Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw
    @MattBalzer

    Percival (View Comment):

    Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw (View Comment):

    Percival (View Comment):

    Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw (View Comment):

    DrewInWisconsin, Ope! (View Comment):

    Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw (View Comment):

    Matt Balzer, Imperialist Claw (View Comment):

    DrewInWisconsin, Ope! (View Comment):

    Oh my lord. What a bunch of whiners.

    https://www.facebook.com/MBCBrews/posts/10161550809409307

     

    They’re gonna drag Minocqua out of the old dark ages and into a newer shinier dark age.

    Speaking of things needing a line by line rebuttal, the sign in that link.

    According to a comment under that post, they’re not even located in Minocqua anymore. But they’re trying to reopen in Minocqua, and whining that the locals are making it too difficult for them.

    As I understand it he sold the pub location and just has a brewery, now he’s trying to reopen a pub.

    If I was the locals I’d slow-walk any permits if not outright deny them. Sorry, we don’t want a local business who insults the locals at every opportunity.

    Yeah, I just can’t understand why his “be a smug jerk” campaign isn’t winning hearts and minds.

    He should aim for a joint in the Peoples’ Republic of Madison.

    Hipster beer sold with a smug attitude in Madison? Talk about your saturated markets.

    This guy is talented. He can out-smug the field.

    What are the categories in that contest?

    • #52
  23. Archibald Campbell Member
    Archibald Campbell
    @ArchieCampbell

    This guy and the Penzeys guy should get a cabin: https://www.penzeys.com/shop/about-republicans/

    • #53
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