The Culture’s Guide to Cancelling Me

 

Once upon a time, political priors were no match for a great comedy – funny was funny. Today many great jokes elicit an anxious over-the-shoulder glance to ensure that the culture’s tastemakers – or your firm’s 22-year-old social media intern – don’t disapprove. Rolling with it is a thing of the past.

No longer is a comic’s greatest fear having his sitcom but his entire career – canceled.  With airlines, sports teams, and soft drink manufacturers climbing over one another to bow before the Woke Mob, what is a corporate event planner to do? She must now not only ensure the comedian she hires is funny (or even funny and clean) but also has the correct views.

This means scouring the internet for comedian’s social media posts, blogs, columns, affiliations, and more: all in search of something which might be disqualifying, like that hilarious five-minute bit of yours about how men can’t get pregnant.

How much time could event planners save if they could vet a comic with a single click? With that in mind, below is the most powerful time-saving tool available for event planners seeking a comedy entertainer for their next function: the official Quick-and-Dirty Guide to determining if David Deeble the kind of entertainer you want performing your organization.

Do I Put The Party First?

We all know that in politics, The Party comes first – just ask Trotsky. Likewise, few things should remove an entertainer from consideration quicker than mocking our friends The Democrats. Watch the clip below and decide for yourself if I show the proper respect for The Party of Government. (:29s)

Is My Misinformation About Treating Rabies A Form Of Vaccine Hesitancy?

Recall how our ruling class distanced itself from the vaccines when they were created under the auspices of the Trump administration and now seek to mandate them since their effectiveness against the Delta variant has been brought into question. If the vaccines were a stock, you could’ve made a fortune by buying it during the Trump administration and selling it before the emergence of the Delta variant. Vaccine hesitancy has become a kind of sin in the eyes of the militantly secular, and to so much as a joke about injections can elicit from them an Are you or have you ever been a vaccine skeptic? posture. Does the clip below take me out of consideration on that basis? You decide. (:23s)

Do I Perpetuate Fake News?

Though I’ve published eight nine articles in the Babylon Bee, none of them have been honored with a fact-check from Snopes. With the advent of the Internet, news consumers need no longer rely on the assurances of the Big Three television networks – and apparently that’s a problem. Therefore we must turn our anxious gaze to the likes of Facebook and self-appointed fact-checkers like Glenn Kessler to ensure that no misinformation ever settles into our pretty little heads. Fact-check the following clip to determine if my headlines are any faker than those proffered daily by CNN. (2:03s)

Do My Audiences Know When To Laugh? 

Jeb! taught us that in politics it’s permissible to tell the audience when to clap. In comedy, however, the standup can’t signal to the audience when to laugh. Like a man who’s wife is having an affair, they should just know. As the clip below (1:18s) clearly demonstrates, I don’t always succeed.

Do I Have The Correct Views On Plastic? 

Readers may be aware that before plastic bags were replaced with paper bags in order to save the planet, paper bags had been replaced with plastic bags in order to – wait for it – save the planet. No mind – the important thing to know is that designed-in-a-lab progressives like Gavin Newsom know what’s best for the environment. Do I? See for yourself. (1:04s)

To be a professional comedian is to be an entrepreneur, which is to say I don’t have to work with anyone I don’t want to work with. And if you don’t want to work with me because my politics, well, then I don’t want to work with you regardless of your politics. Or better yet, let’s go back to the world where comedy was comedy and politics was politics – and late night TV was dominated by Democrats like Johnny Carson, who wouldn’t dream of alienating half is audience by injecting his politics into every monologue.

Published in Entertainment
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  1. WI Con Member
    WI Con
    @WICon

    Solid material there Dave! Funny. What’s best way of knowing if you’d be doing a show in the Chicago-Mikwaukee area?

    • #1
  2. David Deeble Member
    David Deeble
    @DavidDeeble

    WI Con (View Comment):

    Solid material there Dave! Funny. What’s best way of knowing if you’d be doing a show in the Chicago-Mikwaukee area?

    The best place to keep up to date with me professionally is at http://www.daviDDeeble.com. Enjoy!

    • #2
  3. The Reticulator Member
    The Reticulator
    @TheReticulator

    Comedy? That’s not funny.

    Don’t you realize that there are millions of people who are still not bowing down to the Ivy League elite?   How can you laugh in the face of such inequity and injustice? 

    • #3
  4. Matt Bartle Member
    Matt Bartle
    @MattBartle

    Good stuff, although I think I heard the “one of each” joke on Hee Haw back in the 60’s.

    Of course, back then it was it actually a joke.

    • #4
  5. MarciN Member
    MarciN
    @MarciN

    David Deeble: Readers may be aware that before plastic bags were replaced with paper bags in order to save the planet, paper bags had been replaced with plastic bags in order to – wait for it – save the planet.

    I remember this.

    Thank you. You’re the first person to voice that recollection. :-)

    I picture grocery store chains with huge warehouses full of all types of bags that are arranged as a walk through history. And the executives know if they wait long enough, some of them will surely return to whatever the government wants them to use this week. :-)

    • #5
  6. Bryan G. Stephens Thatcher
    Bryan G. Stephens
    @BryanGStephens

    Well said and well done sir. 

     

    • #6
  7. Matt Bartle Member
    Matt Bartle
    @MattBartle

    MarciN (View Comment):

    David Deeble: Readers may be aware that before plastic bags were replaced with paper bags in order to save the planet, paper bags had been replaced with plastic bags in order to – wait for it – save the planet.

    I remember this.

    Thank you. You’re the first person to voice that recollection. :-)

    I picture grocery store chains with huge warehouses full of all types of bags that arranged as a walk through history. And the executives know if they wait long enough, some of them will surely return to whatever the government wants them to use this week. :-)

     

    I remember this, too. We used to see images of paper factories and hear about all the chemicals and water they used. And of course, it took logging and that was perhaps the worst environmental sin for a while. Think of the owls! Now, somehow, paper is good again.

    • #7
  8. Steven Seward Member
    Steven Seward
    @StevenSeward

    That was a real  hoot!  I’m so  thankful I am a conservative and am allowed to laugh at jokes!  Keep up  the good work!  I think I’ve just run out of exclamation points!  Well, I guess not!

    • #8
  9. Hartmann von Aue Member
    Hartmann von Aue
    @HartmannvonAue

    Funny coincidence- We were watching a collection of your YouTube clips when Felicia came home from school today. Her reaction, “Are you guys OK? You were laughing so loud.”

    • #9
  10. The Reticulator Member
    The Reticulator
    @TheReticulator

    Steven Seward (View Comment):

    That was a real hoot! I’m so thankful I am a conservative and am allowed to laugh at jokes! Keep up the good work! I think I’ve just run out of exclamation points! Well, I guess not!

    How can you laugh when there are still people in Mongolia who aren’t allowed to vote in our elections?  Remove the inequities, and then maybe we can laugh again.  

    • #10
  11. Steven Seward Member
    Steven Seward
    @StevenSeward

    The Reticulator (View Comment):

    Steven Seward (View Comment):

    That was a real hoot! I’m so thankful I am a conservative and am allowed to laugh at jokes! Keep up the good work! I think I’ve just run out of exclamation points! Well, I guess not!

    How can you laugh when there are still people in Mongolia who aren’t allowed to vote in our elections? Remove the inequities, and then maybe we can laugh again.

    Well send them some mail-in ballots so  I  can continue the laughter!!!

    • #11
  12. Spin Coolidge
    Spin
    @Spin

    Matt Bartle (View Comment):

    Good stuff, although I think I heard the “one of each” joke on Hee Haw back in the 60’s.

    Of course, back then it was it actually a joke.

    He stole that joke from me.  But I’m not bitter.  

    • #12
  13. James Lileks Contributor
    James Lileks
    @jameslileks

    Or better yet, let’s go back to the world where comedy was comedy and politics was politics – and late night TV was dominated by Democrats like Johnny Carson, who wouldn’t dream of alienating half is audience by injecting his politics into every monologue.

    The old comedians were not above a political reference; Hope made them, Jack Benny made them. Carson made them in the same vein: making comedy out of a reference to a misfortune or setback that had nothing to do with the ideas of the party. Everyone could laugh, because it wasn’t clapter intended to signal the moral superiority of one side over the other. 

    • #13
  14. Steven Seward Member
    Steven Seward
    @StevenSeward

    James Lileks (View Comment):

    Or better yet, let’s go back to the world where comedy was comedy and politics was politics – and late night TV was dominated by Democrats like Johnny Carson, who wouldn’t dream of alienating half is audience by injecting his politics into every monologue.

    The old comedians were not above a political reference; Hope made them, Jack Benny made them. Carson made them in the same vein: making comedy out of a reference to a misfortune or setback that had nothing to do with the ideas of the party. Everyone could laugh, because it wasn’t clapter intended to signal the moral superiority of one side over the other.

    I thought “clapter” was a typo until I looked it up :

    “A joke, often making a political or social statement, whose purpose is to make the audience applaud and agree instead of laugh.”

    That describes late-night comedy perfectly!

    • #14
  15. Dbroussa Coolidge
    Dbroussa
    @Dbroussa

    The plastic bag juggling was awesome.  I still want to find out about your time in Venice now as well.

    • #15