Winfrey v. Robertson: Who'd You Rather Invite to Dinner?
By now, you've all heard the tragic story of Oprah Winfrey's malicious mistreatment at the hands of a snooty handbag sales clerk in Zurich, Switzerland. Oprah claims to have been racially profiled while attempting to peruse a $38,000 Tom Ford "Jennifer" handbag (named for Jennifer Aniston) she hoped to carry to Tina's (as in, Turner's) wedding. Apparently the presumptuous sales clerk had the stones to say, "Non!," to the multibillionaire talk show media darling. Judge the story for yourself.
I always thought snooty sales clerks were part of the European boutique shopping experience, but what do I know? I'm just a hausfrau from heartland America. I've never been to Zurich for Tina Turner's wedding. In fact, I've never been to Zurich at all.
The nation of Switzerland, having been mortified and duly chastened by the experience, has agreed to meet with Oprah's people to discuss the terms of surrender (What else?). Oprah is expected to assume control of the network... uh, nation... in mid September, just in time for the Christmas shopping rush.
Oh, the humanity! Our poor dear Oprah! And those poor Swiss peasants who will be forced to labor in the Rolex mines for their racist sins...
Meanwhile, back in the most racist nation on the planet, from whence Oprah (who, lets just take note, is black) issued her Swiss conquest, redneck Jase Robertson of Duck Dynasty fame, who, together with his father and brothers make ZZ Top look like they should be spokesmen for Norelco, was facially profiled in an upscale NY hotel. In fact, it was the Trump International(e) bellman who showed Jase the door.
Mon Dieu! Is there no end to the prejudice?! And the name-dropping?
Only one question remains. It's Mr. Chauvinist's ultimate test for judging the likability of public figures. Which one would you rather have as a guest in your home for dinner? Jase Robertson or Oprah Winfrey?
You can probably guess which one I think is the class act and all-around good guy. Let me just say, it's not the one in the Donna Karan skirt.