It's a tough slog these days if you're leading the nation, or if you're being led for that matter, down the happy path to economic cuckoo land and cultural asininity. Then again, it really is a matter of perspective, right? Comedian and professional vulgarian Chris Rock grew uncharacteristically somber last week when he instructed us that:
The president and first lady are kind of like the mom and dad of the country. And when your dad says something, you listen. And when you don't it usually bites you in the ass.
I said his remarks were uncharacteristic because in 2011 he predicted that a second term Obama administration would engage in, "some gangsta [expletive]." "There's a [expletive-ing] art to the first term," Mr. Rock opined, "because you're always running for a second term the whole time." The comedian expressed his hopes thus:
I'm like everybody, I want more action. But I understand that he's not trying to [expletive] off a lot of people. But I believe wholeheartedly if he's back in, he's going to do some gangsta [expletive].
Actually, I think Rock got it right back in 2011, and would rather he had stuck to his guns last week instead of watering it down in the lukewarm, paternalistic gruel of mommy and daddy nonsense. Though sticking to one's guns these days is liable to incur the wrath of everybody from Mayor of Murder Central Rahm Emanuel to Diane Feinstein to Hizzoner Mayor Bloomberg, who would rather waterboard you with no more than 22 ounces of sugar-free soda from a non-styrafoam container than see you stick to your guns with more than seven bullets to defend life and hearth.
By the way, do mommies and daddies abandon their own when they are in mortal danger? Actually, yes, some of them do, …but those aren't generally regarded as model parents. During a Senate hearing last week, outgoing (but not fast enough) Secretary of Defense Leon Panetta revealed that he had informed President Obama in real time of the ongoing attack on an American consulate in Benghazi, which led to a stunning exchange with Senator Kelly Ayotte:
AYOTTE: Did you have any further communications? Did he ever call you that night to say how are things going, what's going on, where is the consulate?
AYOTTE: Did you communicate with anyone else at the White House that night?
AYOTTE: No one else called you to say, what, how are things going?
Four Americans, including an American ambassador and two Navy SEALS, died that night during an attack that proceeded over a span of more than 7 hours, and during which American forces were precluded from responding because the "dad of the country" was AWOL. With a dad like that, who the hell needs death panels? Even The Washington Post, through writer Erik Wemple, agreed that these were, "…telling and consequential tidbits about Benghazi."
Meanwhile, on American shores, we learn from the CBO that our dad's health care program will kick some 7 million Americans off of their employer-provided health insurance. Remember back when he was telling us, "If you like your health care plan, you can keep your health care plan. Period." But, as Chris Rock might remind us, that was during dad's first term, back when he told us Santa Claus was real. Unfortunately, though not unpredictably, things will get worse still. As Kathryn Serkes of the Doctor Patient Medical Association explains it:
Doctors clearly understand what Washington does not -- that a piece of paper that says you are 'covered' by insurance or 'enrolled' in Medicare or Medicaid does not translate to actual medical care when doctors can't afford to see patients at the lowball payments, and patients have to jump through government and insurance company bureaucratic hoops.
Clearly then, dad is in his "gangsta [expletive]" phase of fundamental transformation and, well, … things are being fundamentally transformed.
Among the things being transformed will be your grocery bill. Under the auspices of Obamacare, the FDA is set to impose shiny new rules that could cost grocery owners a billion dollar in the first year alone. According to Erik Lieberman of the Food Marketing Institute, grocers and restaurants will be required to place additional nutritional information on food bars, salad bars, bakery goods, soups, etc. "If you get it wrong, it's a federal crime, " said Lieberman, "and you could face jail time and thousands of dollars." But this is dad's brave new world, where all is sweetness and unicorns, unless dad turns his cap sideways, lets his pants sag, and busts a new regulation on yo [expletive].
Speaking of going gangsta, did you hear the one about the Cincinnati poll worker who voted twice? This, of course, goes under the heading of non-existent voter fraud, and explains why requiring voters to display as much identification as is needed to buy a pack of cigarettes is racist … or something like that. Meet Melowese Richardson, a Democrat and poll worker of some 25 years in Hamilton County, who readily admitted to the local media that she voted twice last November, first via absentee ballot and then in person, because her faith in the system which employed people like her for a quarter of a century was such that she feared her absentee ballot wouldn't be counted in time. Her granddaughter, India Richardson, was similarly fretful, for she too voted twice. Insisting that she had done nothing wrong, Melowese affirmed that, "I'll fight for it for Mr. Obama and for Mr. Obama's right to sit as President of the United States."
The problem is that Mr. Obama's "right to sit" in the White House is contingent on the people having conferred that right upon him by virtue of their votes, and the American people have every right to expect that their votes are not compromised or negated by a system which permits its poll workers to vote multiple times.
There is some fleeting hope, as the effronteries on human dignity, reason and freedom continue, that there will perhaps be a crystallization of American opinion that things weren't supposed to turn out this way, that our people in harms way have every right to expect their Commander-in-Chief to attend to their survival when under attack, that rising food prices aren't the correct result of a health care bill, and that a government which seeks increasingly to disarm its citizens even as it arms itself to the teeth has more in common with the wretched and failed totalitarian experiments of the last century than with the enlightened ideas that founded this nation.
Perhaps Chris Rock might take a breath just long enough to remember (or learn) that a bloody revolution was fought on these shores precisely because someone who fashioned himself as our familial chief did "some gangsta [expletive]" to a free people. The result was a disappointment for King George, but gave birth to a nation so free and so exceptional that a talented performer like Chris Rock can vulgarize his way to prosperity and is given a public platform from which he can wish "gangsta [expletive]" on his countrymen.