The Conspiracy Game: Get it Out of Your System While the Offer Lasts
As you know, our Code of Conduct prohibits the discussion of "99 percent of conspiracy theories."
But!
Mathematicians will note the implication: One percent of them are allowed! But which ones, I wonder? Just for today, let's play a little game. Do you ever have a sneaking suspicion that one of those really whacked-out conspiracy theories no right-thinking person is supposed to embrace just may be true? Why?
The contributor who makes the most compelling and lucid defense of the most ostensibly totally lunatic conspiracy theory will win today's Ricochet Gold Medal. It's just glory, but heck, it's a lot of glory. To get yourself in the mood you will want to begin by asking: Does Claire actually know in advance who the winner will be? Why is she asking this? Cui bono?
Don't get too excited about this game though. Only one percent will make the qualifying round, and once this discussion's over, it's over--except for the lucky winner.
I'll begin. Look, people: A plane carrying the Polish president, the chief of the General Staff, the most senior figures in the Polish military and intelligence services, the president of the National Bank of Poland, the deputy foreign minister, twelve members of the Polish parliament, and senior members of the Polish clergy crashes because of "fog" on the way to a commemoration of the 70th anniversary of the Katyn massacre, killing all on board. There are gaps in the black box tapes, Polish pilots say the transcript makes no sense, and the air traffic controller in question has mysteriously disappeared. Do you seriously want me to take Vladimir Putin's word for it that there's nothing fishy about this? Seriously?
Right, I got that out of my system. (As did Diana West, today.) I feel much better. Occam's Razor, come back! All is forgiven!
Your turn.
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Comments :
May '10
Re: The Conspiracy Game: Get it Out of Your System While the Offer Lasts
Yeah, that Polish thing didn't smell right. I firmly believe that Fidel Castro has been dead for some years now, and all those quotes and press releases are made up by apparatchiks in a desperate attempt to Keep Hope Alive.
Aug '10
Re: The Conspiracy Game: Get it Out of Your System While the Offer Lasts
How's this: By September of '08, McCain was polling even with Obama, overcoming a deficit caused by the Regime Media when Sara Palin stumbled on Katie Couric's show. McCain's commercial displaying Obama's Messiah complex, cross cutting between his Berlin speech and Charlton Heston as Moses parting the Red Sea, was viral. People were noticing that Obama actually believed his own hype, that "...sea levels will drop....."
In mid-September, someone engineered a $550 billion run on dollar-denominated money markets; that much was withdrawn in a single day. This caused a worldwide panic that led to the catastrophe we're still dealing with. This pivotal event caused a surge in the polls for all Democrats.
China and Russia together - with guidance from George Soros - could easily have pulled this off. They have much more of our money than that in their banks, thanks to the trade deficit. George Soros - through his puppet operations like MoveOn.org - has spent hundreds of millions for over a decade, trying to gain control of our government.
Rep. Paul Kanjorski (D-Penn.) held hearings at the time, to investigate. Here's the link:
http://www.bestsyndication.com/?q=20090210_2008_run_on_banks_money_market_representative_kanjorski_cspan.htm
Re: The Conspiracy Game: Get it Out of Your System While the Offer Lasts
Soros--yes, high conspiracy theory value, everyone in Turkey believes he's behind everything bad that happens, and the Turks are world leaders when it comes to conspiracy theories. You're in the lead so far, River! Kennedy Smith, you'll have to do better at justifying your Castro's-still-alive choice. We need a convoluted argument to go with that, and maybe a website with photos, a lot of capitalization and exclamation points.
Jul '10
Re: The Conspiracy Game: Get it Out of Your System While the Offer Lasts
Castro's alive. C-SPAN has been broadcasting what seems like gavel-to-gavel coverage of the Cuban national assembly or whatever they call it. It seems to consist of stooges lavishly praising El Jefe in the form of lengthy questions and Castro answering at considerably more length. You would never know Cuba is an overwhelmingly black nation when the camera plays over the audience, faces lifted to bask in the radiance of their leader. No, the conspiracy I'd like to see unmasked is why the oddly-named MSM has never looked into the mystery of Obama's origins. It doesn't matter whether the rumors are true, although 43% of the populace seems to think his country of birth isn't this one. What's interesting is the press has locked arms and closed minds against the idea, occasionally making use of ridicule per Alinksy when required. We know from JournoList, now called Cabalist, that message coordination in cooperation with the White House was not unusual if not commonplace. Or is group think a better explanation?
May '10
Re: The Conspiracy Game: Get it Out of Your System While the Offer Lasts
IT'S THE FROZEN HEAD OF FIDEL CASTRO!!! IN BRAZIL, HOLDING COURT WITH THE FROZEN HEAD OF HITLER!!!
Jul '10
Re: The Conspiracy Game: Get it Out of Your System While the Offer Lasts
At the end of my last sentence please insert !!!
Re: The Conspiracy Game: Get it Out of Your System While the Offer Lasts
Yes, I have just introduced a new rule in this game. If your theory isn't followed by three exclamation points, it's DISQUALIFIED!!!
Previous entries are exempt, and Soros is still in the LEAD!!!
May '10
Re: The Conspiracy Game: Get it Out of Your System While the Offer Lasts
Aliens have been abducting innocent Americans and CLAIRE IS IN ON THE COVER-UP!!!!!
The typical abduction goes as follows (see for starters "Intruders" by Bud Hopkins and "Communion" by Whitley Strieber): One experiences "missing time," an hour or so for which he can not account. Through hypnosis, it's revealed that he was abducted by small big-eyed beings and subjected to various tests, apocalyptic images, and sometimes the insertion of (non-breast) "implants," which have been independently determined to be transducers of some sort. A Harvard PhD shrink, John Mack, examined the abduction phenomenon as a psychosis, but DETERMINED IT TO BE REAL!!!!! And for more on the implants, google Dr. Roger Leir.
Claire's role. On Nov. 30, 1989, Linda Cortile was abducted in a light-show spectacular within view of the Brooklyn Bridge, witnessed by a passing UN delegation (Hopkins's "Witnessed" 1996). Security agents and (anonymously) UN Secretary General Javier Perez de Cuellar have corroborated, who all said they thought they were witnessing the filming of a Hollywood movie (AT 3 AM!!!). The delegation also experienced "missing time." And who else was in this delegation? MARGARET THATCHER!!!! WHAT DOES CLAIRE KNOW?!!!!! (seriously)
May '10
Re: The Conspiracy Game: Get it Out of Your System While the Offer Lasts
Claire, it was definitely more amusing when Putin was simply turning on microphones at inopportune times. I buy your position though. I remember thinking at the time there was no way the crash was an accident. The fact that this hasn't led to a war is head-scratching.
As for Soros, I've heard similar complaints from a Macedonian former colleague of mine who believed that Soros owned her entire country. Although...I previously worked for an organization that dealt with the former communist bloc countries (one of the few not owned by Soros), and the number of students from the Balkans and Central Asia who on conference applications listed Soros' book as the most important of the past 20 years was a disturbing trend. I don't know if they just made a false assumption about our benefactors and were trying to suck up, or whether this was something more sinister.
As for my personal choice, I'd argue for NBA Commissioner David Stern forcing the Pau Gasol trade to make the Lakers relevant again. This kind of one-sided trade would ONLY happen to the Lakers, and conveniently in time to revive their rivalry with Boston!!!
Jul '10
Re: The Conspiracy Game: Get it Out of Your System While the Offer Lasts
Rob Long and his show-biz cabal are the evil minds behind the secretive Hollywood Instant-Weightloss Marinated Cat Diet!!!
Re: The Conspiracy Game: Get it Out of Your System While the Offer Lasts
Editors: This isn't funny anymore. Silence Mr. Reusser and make this comment disappear. Make sure the photo goes, too. As if he never lived. No blowback.
Re: The Conspiracy Game: Get it Out of Your System While the Offer Lasts
Let me repeat: No one, but no one, is to mention my name in connection with the Space Hounds of Argon III ever again. The punishment for infractions will be swift and merciless. It will also involve probes that burn like fire.
May '10
Re: The Conspiracy Game: Get it Out of Your System While the Offer Lasts
Strike a nerve, Claire? Not so fun to have the Fourth Estate turned against you, is it? And I knew your complexion looked a bit "grey" and your eyes a bit "large" in your photo.
Jun '10
Re: The Conspiracy Game: Get it Out of Your System While the Offer Lasts
It’s the Universe; it has stopped expanding, see, in preparation for the big crunch due in November. A spokesman for AIG was quick to email MSNBC to say that his company would be offering Big Crunch default swaps should the worst come to pass and the American economy not grow sufficiently to save the Universe from this untoward contraction. Somewhere is deep space, not far from the Arugula nebula (ncp856104) astronomers have spotted a new black hole forming, and named it the Michelle, to commemorate the first lady’s Spanish Fly-away (that’s as in vacation you dirty minded creeps). George Soros when reached for comment said: “She’s not sucking up any of my money, so you deal with it.” Reporters didn’t have an opportunity to ask to whom he was referring, but the choices are: The first lady, Hillary Clinton, the Democratic Party, or Media anti-Matters—Mr. Soros’s latest foray into his obsession with Fox. Meanwhile at GlenBeckistan conservatives are reporting a harmonic convergence between the forces of nature and nurture as Sarah Palin and a couple of grizzle moms are scheduled to guest host during the first week in November!!!!
May '10
Re: The Conspiracy Game: Get it Out of Your System While the Offer Lasts
Oh , come on. Points should be awarded for actually believing a theory, and I truly believe Castro is dead, dead, DEAD!!! Has been for years. Stock footage don't prove nuthin.
Nor does OLIVER STONE!!!
Re: The Conspiracy Game: Get it Out of Your System While the Offer Lasts
The Logo is reminded of ~Paules's drunk live blogging. Have at it while you can.
Even our advertisers seem to be caught up in the conspiratorial zeal, judging by the ads placed on this page right now. Here's one:
Jun '10
Re: The Conspiracy Game: Get it Out of Your System While the Offer Lasts
Meanwhile, back at the Oval Office where President Obama and his top military advisor and sometime ghost writer, Bill Ayers, are monitoring Michelle’s progress. Currently, the President has two choices: 1) appoint a Michelle Tsar to oversee planning and finance, or 2) consult with Islamic theologians about how to handle Michelle. Nancy Pelosi, when asked about the ‘Big Crunch’ looked at first startled by the question and then reverted to form by asking: “Are you kidding? Are you kidding?” Nancy, when stalling for time, has taken to repeating herself before falling back on NEA talking points. The good news for the Obama administration is that the next vacation season is in December, and as near as the President and his top advisors can tell based on their close reading of the Islamic calendar December is sometime after November, making it moot (that’s a professor word you [eds: expletive CENSORED, Cas, what are you thinking, is this what happens when we give you just a bit of liberty, you abuse it like this?] may not have heard). Sadly, the only option available to forestall the Big Crunch is the “Cry Havoc” strategy, which as Keith Olbermann announced yesterday, involves the president “Letting slip the dogs of bore"!!!
Edited on Aug 16, 2010 at 4:33amMay '10
Re: The Conspiracy Game: Get it Out of Your System While the Offer Lasts
Why, pray tell, is C-SPAN broadcasting gavel-to-gavel coverage of the Cuban national assembly? Anyone want to take a conspiratorial run at that one?
Aug '10
Re: The Conspiracy Game: Get it Out of Your System While the Offer Lasts
I'm not sure this counts as a conspiracy theory -- it's more a scientific disagreement where the dissenters from the mainstream are treated as conspiracy theorists:
A very small number of scientists posit that HIV is correlated with AIDS not because it's the causal agent, but because HIV is a passenger virus that serves as a marker for AIDS-risk activities.
A larger, but still very small, segment of scientists, posit that, even if HIV causes AIDS, the standard antiretroviral drugs are not a rational treatment for AIDS, as they are so toxic to human cells that the damage they do (even to AIDS patients) outweighs the intended good.
I don't have the credentials to give an authoritative opinion (only 1 year each of undergraduate general biology, microbiology, general chemistry, and statistics). But what fascinates me is how much the dissenters are hated for raising questions about how HIV accomplishes the ills ascribed to it.
Dawkins claims he appreciates creationists, because even though he's sure they're wrong, addressing their objections tightens his own theories. Yet mainstream AIDS scientists seem to treat dissenters as not just wrong, but evil and deserving of censorship.
That's interesting.
Aug '10
Re: The Conspiracy Game: Get it Out of Your System While the Offer Lasts
In the early '90's, Soros risked over a billion dollars and shorted the British pound, which caused its collapse. Ever since, he's been known as "the man who broke the Bank of England", a financial institution which was once renowned as the soundest bank in the world. Soros made probably $2 billion on the transaction.
Again, in 1997, Soros shorted Asian currencies and created what's still known as The Asian Crisis. He's clearly become an expert in the field, and knows how to commit epic theft and destruction. He influences the Regime Media daily, and funds The Huffington Post, Media Matters, the Tides Foundation, and other Statist groups!!!!
Check this link:
http://www.investopedia.com/university/greatest/georgesoros.asp