O Christmas Tree
Amid the Romney-Newt wars, the pullout from Iraq, the continued sluggishness of the economy, I bring you a video that takes us back to the here and now for many dads and moms: the annual battle of the Christmas Tree.
This was produced by Brian Gaffney, who also does the documentaries at Fox News.
You've heard of trying to fit 10 pounds of potatoes into a 5 pound sack? This is about trying to fit a 16-foot Christmas tree into a home plainly not designed for it, with (rightly) skeptical wife narrating in the background. I too once brought a chainsaw into my living room to deal with an uncooperative Christmas tree, but not like Brian. Anyway, enjoy.
And spare a little prayer for me. In but 3 hours I will be at the Christmas recital for my two youngest children. Each year I am a little more appalled than the year before at the selection. This year my eight year old is singing about recycling. I kid you not.
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Jun '11
Re: O Christmas Tree
In our house, my Christmas tree motto has always been: "Go big or go home" (well, actually, go big and go home). The Lovely Mrs. Lane's motto: "You've got to be kidding."
Re: O Christmas Tree
Oh man!!! That was cringe inducing.
Thanks for posting...it'll make my family feel better about our incident this year. My fiance and my brother set up the tree (an 11-footer or so) in my parents' living room at around 6pm on a Saturday. At midnight, the tree toppled over, and came out of its stand, resulting in a pool of water all over the floor and Christmas tree ornament havoc.
Jun '10
Re: O Christmas Tree
I'll comment (channeling P. G. Wodehouse) on children's recitals. I realize yours is a vocal recital and this comment from Bertie Wooster relates to a violin recital, but it does contains some universal truths about all recitals:
May the good Lord bless you.
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Additional comment: Having now seen the painful video, all I can say is "fake tree."
Edited on Dec 15, 2011 at 1:56pmSep '11
Re: O Christmas Tree
A word to the wise:
Record every last second on a high-quality video camera with serious audio capability.
Years from now, when Junior is at his wedding rehearsal dinner with his betrothed and all her family, you will thank me.
Dec '10
Re: O Christmas Tree
All that trouble when you can get a 7 foot pre-lit for about a 100 bucks. Christmas in a box, says I. Stand it up and plug it in. Saves on fuss, mess, allergies, sawdust, and sap. God Bless America!
Just got home from eldest Chauvinist daughter's 8th grade talent show. You're in my prayers, Bill.
May '10
Re: O Christmas Tree
Fake all the way, baby. I just want to take Brian aside and gently explain to him the benefit of the pre-lit, rotating, fake Christmas tree. And it cost about the same as his one-time use real tree. This is our 8th year with our dearly beloved fakey.
Jan '11
Re: O Christmas Tree
They should have used experts. This is how we do it in my family.
Re: O Christmas Tree
Our tree went up with little pain this year. 8 feet. We have a good stand -- but the key is getting a true whose trunk is not that wide.
The Christmas recital was all I feared. Why is it that school music is always the soft underbelly? It's always where those who hate tradition strike first.
Feb '11
Re: O Christmas Tree
Fabulously great beyond belief - because - that could *easily* be me. Except Mrs. Killick (not the one bought at a fair in a halter - read the book) would nix the chainsaw-in-the-house bit. And I do have that exact stand.
Edited on Dec 16, 2011 at 8:45am