Is Rob Long's Reign of Terror Over At Last?
I hope not. Larry King's last show is on today--which would be tragic if it also meant the end of Rob's hilariously savage "transcripts" of the show in his Long View column in National Review. This was some of the funniest satire I ever read and possibly the only thing on the green earth that could ever have made me feel sorry for King. Here's a snippet of one of my favorites, King interviews Judas Iscariot about the so-called Judas Gospel:
LARRY KING: "Tomorrow night! Remembering Don Knotts! A surprising hour! From Chicago, Illinois, you're on with our guest, Judas Iscariot! Hello!"
CALLER: "Hi, Larry. Hi, Judas. Can I call you Judas?"JUDAS ISCARIOT: "Of course."
CALLER: "It's just that I feel like I've known you all my life, so I feel like I can call you Judas. I just want to say that I just finished your gospel, which I loved, and I'd like to know if you have any more books planned?"
LARRY KING: "Good question. Is this thing the start of a franchise? I keep thinking Da Vinci Code, I keep thinking Narnia."
JUDAS ISCARIOT: "No, no, Larry. It's just the one gospel. At least for now."
LARRY KING: "But they gotta be after you, right? Phone ringing off the hook? Books, movies, right?"
JUDAS ISCARIOT: "Honestly, Larry, I live a quiet life. You know, when they quote unquote found my gospel — the publishing world is crazy, I wrote the damn thing 2,000 years ago and have been pushing it and pushing it and pushing it, suddenly it's out there and I'm a quote unquote overnight success — anyway, they find it, we make a deal — "
LARRY KING: "Was it a good deal?"
JUDAS ISCARIOT: "You know what, Larry? It was fair. I can't complain about the deal."
LARRY KING: "Thirty pieces of silver, and all that? Kidding!"
JUDAS ISCARIOT: "Listen, Larry, you gotta have a sense of humor about life."
LARRY KING: "Here I am the Jew talking about pieces of silver! Gotta tread careful with this stuff, am I right?"
"I live a quiet life." Great stuff. When comes such another?
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Comments :
May '10
Re: Is Rob Long's Reign of Terror Over At Last?
Kenneth has been skillfully channeling Rob lately- according to the best Hollywood tradition, shouldn't Rob be finding a way sooner rather than later to eliminate the looming threat?
Re: Is Rob Long's Reign of Terror Over At Last?
Since they're "savage 'transcripts'" should I ask Rob for a small royalty?
Re: Is Rob Long's Reign of Terror Over At Last?
You have no idea how awful this news is to me. Larry King was my go-to guy. Whenever I was stuck for a column idea, Larry would spring forth and deliver it.
May '10
Re: Is Rob Long's Reign of Terror Over At Last?
I love reading Rob's columns in NR. And no, I'm not just kissing up... I've let Rob know this before, but I try to save his stuff for the very last when going through dead tree NR. I feel like I've got to do my due diligence reading all of the other stuff - eating my good, healthy protein and veggies. Then I save Rob's pieces for my chocolate torte ganache dessert. Oh, and I've since added Happy Warrior and Athwart to my dessert list. The Bent Pin is the cherry on the banana split.
Re: Is Rob Long's Reign of Terror Over At Last?
Rob, if I may ... give serious thought to Christiane Amanpour.
Sep '10
Re: Is Rob Long's Reign of Terror Over At Last?
There is still time to do a few "Larry King Live . . . from the retirement home" interviews before the man is completely forgotten.
"So tell me Myrna, do those tennis balls really make it easier to push around your walker?"