Inside Claire’s Head {Updated, now with apology!}
People are always coming up to me here at the Ricochet Ministry of Information, carefully picking their way through the rusty-debris-strewn wasteland around the building and wandering its empty, echoing halls until the sound of Bulgarian 5.56mm AK rounds attracts their attention. Usually they flee at that point, but those brave enough to still seek me out—and/or are wearing today's fashionable Kevlar apparel—usually find me up here in my corner office shooting at Aon chairs (I've scrounged a bungee cord and built a chair-a-pult). And when those people come up to me (I suppose “are always” might be a bit of an exaggeration, but it’s lonely here, people!), the first thing they ask is always “Blah blah blah Claire blah? Claire blah blah? Claire blah Claire Claire Claire blah Claire!”
And in response, I give them one warning shot.
Let it not be said we’re not tough but fair at RicMinInform. Because, seriously, I still haven’t gotten memo one from the junta. I’m getting a little stir crazy. Can you tell?
Anyway, all you Claire cultists out there obviously want some deep insight into her thought processes, right? Well, fine. Here [was] three and a half minutes stolen directly from Claire’s occipital cortex by Leo DeCaprio’s crew. (Keep with it—about two and a half minutes in, I was laughing out loud. Oh, and warning: half the band’s name is a four-letter-word.)
{Edited to remove the embedded video which was displaying said word on the conversation page. My apologies to all and sundry for the unintentional vulgarity. Mea culpa. Also edited to remove the link to said video. If you really want to see it and can deal with a common nasty word, it’s called “Red Lights” and you can go look for it on YouTube. You’ll know you’ve found it when you go, “Ugh, terrible, gross band name.”}
- Comment (17)
- · Quote
- · UnfollowFollow (1)
Comments :
Oct '10
Re: Inside Claire’s Head {Updated, now with apology!}
FWIW, AKs come in 7.62 and 5.45mm.
Just helping the RicMinInform with its accuracy.
Cool video, nonetheless!
Re: Inside Claire’s Head {Updated, now with apology!}
Jeremias Heidefelder: FWIW, AKs come in 7.62 and 5.45mm.
Just helping the RicMinInform with its accuracy.
Cool video, nonetheless! · Oct 14 at 11:46pm
You probably missed it, but the junta sent me a case of these. What can I tell you?
I wrote that poorly above. The Kalashnikov (variants) are Bulgarian, not the ammo.
Thanks anyway, Jeremias, and feel free to come by and shoot up some chairs any time.
Oct '10
Re: Inside Claire’s Head {Updated, now with apology!}
Bill Walsh
You probably missed it, but the junta sent me a case of these. What can I tell you?
I wrote that poorly above. The Kalashnikov (variants) are Bulgarian, not the ammo.
Thanks anyway, Jeremias, and feel free to come by and shoot up some chairs any time. · Oct 14 at 11:58pm
I didn't know that, but it makes perfect design sense, given the reliability of the AK platform and the nigh-ubiquity of the 5.56 round. Thanks for sharing that!
I don't know about chairs, but can I bring some frozen cabbages?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=na5rEqRcDDg
Re: Inside Claire’s Head {Updated, now with apology!}
Congratulations, Jeremiah, it is the rare man who can catch RicMinInform short on such matters. RicMinInform, you just have no idea how accurately that video captures my life. Just add the call to prayer and a few ferries across the Bosphorus, and that's really about the size of it.
Edited on Oct 15, 2010 at 12:37amOct '10
Re: Inside Claire’s Head {Updated, now with apology!}
So Claire's life is like scenes from Vanishing Point with cats?
Oct '10
Re: Inside Claire’s Head {Updated, now with apology!}
Too bad. I liked the video, and the hardware lesson. But, rules is rules.
And, I'll repost my other response...*ahem* I don't know about chairs, but can I bring frozen cabbages?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=na5rEqRcDDg
Edited on Oct 15, 2010 at 12:38amMay '10
Re: Inside Claire’s Head {Updated, now with apology!}
I'm sure David Berlinski would be very proud, *cough*...
Re: Inside Claire’s Head {Updated, now with apology!}
I'm gonna say more like Bullitt meets From Russia With Love. With cats. But otherwise, yeah, pretty much.
Oct '10
Re: Inside Claire’s Head {Updated, now with apology!}
Claire Berlinski, Ed.: Congratulations, Jeremiah, it is the rare man who can catch RicMinInform short on such matters. RicMinInform, you just have no idea how accurately that video captures my life. Just add the call to prayer and a few ferries across the Bosphorus, and that's really about the size of it. · Oct 15 at 12:08am
Edited on Oct 15 at 12:37 am
Actually, RicMinInform was 99.44% correct. I guess I'll have to work harder. But thank you for the compliment, Claire.
Details do catch my attention--like Obama offering Erdogan the F-35s in another thread of yours.
Oct '10
Re: Inside Claire’s Head {Updated, now with apology!}
Bill Walsh
I'm gonna say more like Bullitt meets From Russia With Love. With cats. But otherwise, yeah, pretty much. · Oct 15 at 12:46am
Ah, if only my life were a fraction as interesting...
Re: Inside Claire’s Head {Updated, now with apology!}
Jeremias Heidefelder
Actually, RicMinInform was 99.44% correct. I guess I'll have to work harder. But thank you for the compliment, Claire.
Details do catch my attention--like Obama offering Erdogan the F-35s in another thread of yours. · Oct 15 at 12:46am
The F-35 is indeed at issue. But the junta and RicMinInform must not be satisfied with 99.44 percent accuracy. We must be infallible. RicMinInform is to be sent to a re-education camp; he shall emerge stronger for the experience.
Aug '10
Re: Inside Claire’s Head {Updated, now with apology!}
What I want to know is how Claire carries on this espionage-perfumed life with so many cats around, as cats are not noted for their loyalty (it's one way in which dogs have the advantage).
Claire, what steps do you take to ensure that your cats remain loyal? Is it that you know all their embarrassing secrets? Or is how you keep their loyalty itself a secret?
Aug '10
Re: Inside Claire’s Head {Updated, now with apology!}
Oh, and if I've found the right YouTube clip (the other half of the band's name is "Holy", maybe?), Claire's thought processes apparently consist of a bunch of computer-or-graphic-design-geek-types stooping over a tangle of electronic equipment as if constipated.
Nice to know.
I did notice, though, that one has a beard a lot like yours, Bill.
Edited on Oct 15, 2010 at 11:31amRe: Inside Claire’s Head {Updated, now with apology!}
Midget Faded Rattlesnake: What I want to know is how Claire carries on this espionage-perfumed life with so many cats around, as cats are not noted for their loyalty (it's one way in which dogs have the advantage).
Claire, what steps do you take to ensure that your cats remain loyal? Is it that you know all their embarrassing secrets? Or is how you keep their loyalty itself a secret? · Oct 15 at 7:49am
I'm not sure they are loyal, Midge. I'm reviewing Daisy's polygraph results with some concern.
May '10
Re: Inside Claire’s Head {Updated, now with apology!}
Claire Berlinski, Ed.
Midget Faded Rattlesnake: What I want to know is how Claire carries on this espionage-perfumed life with so many cats around, as cats are not noted for their loyalty (it's one way in which dogs have the advantage).
Claire, what steps do you take to ensure that your cats remain loyal? Is it that you know all their embarrassing secrets? Or is how you keep their loyalty itself a secret? · Oct 15 at 7:49am
I'm not sure they are loyal, Midge. I'm reviewing Daisy's polygraph results with some concern. · Oct 15 at 8:54am
M.A.D.
May '10
Re: Inside Claire’s Head {Updated, now with apology!}
Midget Faded Rattlesnake: Oh, and if I've found the right YouTube clip (the other half of the band's name is "Holy", maybe?), Claire's thought processes apparently consist of a bunch of computer-or-graphic-design-geek-types stooping over electronic equipment as if constipated.
Nice to know.
I did notice, though, that one has a beard a lot like yours, Bill. · Oct 15 at 7:55am
You've got the right band but the wrong video. Look for the one labeled "Official Video". You'll know its the right one right away.
Oct '10
Re: Inside Claire’s Head {Updated, now with apology!}
An Engineer's Guide to Cat Yodeling...with Cat Polka.