I Went to the Obama Campaign Website So You Don't Have To
Taking a look at President Obama's reelection campaign website for Forbes was the most fun I've had in awhile. Granted, it was the sort of bewildered amusement that comes from realizing the apocalypse will not be a result of carbon emissions from fossil fuels, but from people blathering on and on about their passionate feelings for a political leader.
The site itself is a joke, flashy yet shoddy and wholly lacking in substance. Unless a store full of designer duds is substance.
The campaign seeks to paint Obama as a beloved family member who just happens to also run the country. The testimonials from voters are terrifyingly daft:
Freudian analysis could continue with another supporter’s delusion: “As a young woman, I want my President to want me to succeed—as much as he wants my sister, my friends and his own daughters to succeed.” We want our parents to want us to succeed because it is proof that they love, cherish, and respect us (just as much as our sisters and friends!), even though seeking that validation comes with enormous pressure and the infinite possibility of failure, disappointment, shattered dreams, and family feuds. All young people are beholden to their parents in this way, but no one is beholden to the man who wins the electoral vote every four years. In fact, he is beholden to us. It’s our validation that he seeks.
Only a stalker desires the approval of a public figure she will never meet. Yet, this insecure young woman wants “her President” to care as much about her as “his own daughters.” I can’t imagine a parent who would take on the responsibility of a nation of foster children, yet Obama, through his campaign engineers at least, welcomes it. He’ll be clapping for us when we all achieve our ambitions or at least receive our participation trophies.
The nonsense continues with the portions scripted by his hired "professionals":
The site doesn’t just feature the words of voters in projecting our current executive as our father, friend, and fan. It also features passages that were written by employees or, more likely, unpaid volunteers. It would be safe to assume that the campaign has poached some highly educated young talent for their efforts, but whoever created this monster of mixed metaphors is not among them: “President Obama believes that America is strongest when everybody has a seat at the table. He’s expanded opportunity for every American by taking steps to level the playing field so everybody plays by the same rules.”
Literal vacuity of that sentence aside, its intended message, like the parental mentality, is perilously applied. My fellow women have been the most recently vocal about the leveling of fields and standardization of rulebooks. Obama’s campaign site notes that his health care law makes it such that “being a woman is no longer considered a pre-existing condition.” (Clever, considering all pre-existing conditions are no longer considered pre-existing conditions.)
If you are looking for a laugh and a good spine-shaking shudder, you should check out some of the other golden nuggets I mined from that mess.
Campaign websites are fluffy, patriotically-colored ways of bringing in bucks, but if the person who already holds the office can't come up with anything better than what he has, we should start buying "shared feelings" offsets.
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Comments:
May '11
Re: I Went to the Obama Campaign Website So You Don't Have To
But did it instill a false sense of moral superiority?
I wonder how that prospecitve soldier will feel when s/he realizes that Michelle Obama's support comes in the form of having all preservatives removed from MREs.
Mar '11
Re: I Went to the Obama Campaign Website So You Don't Have To
Maura Pennington:
The site itself is a joke, flashy yet shoddy and wholly lacking in substance.
Sounds like it does a pretty good job of representing Mr Obama - thanks for visiting, so that I don't have to!
Edited on March 19, 2012 at 8:57pmSep '10
Re: I Went to the Obama Campaign Website So You Don't Have To
"he is beholden to us." if only...
Jun '10
Re: I Went to the Obama Campaign Website So You Don't Have To
Thanks for doing this for us. I do receive the Jim Messina emails. They're bile-inducing.
Re: I Went to the Obama Campaign Website So You Don't Have To
Hehe...not your doing I'm sure, but the caption under the Obama logo in your piece says, "Logotipo da campanha de Barack Obama." Portuguese?
Re: I Went to the Obama Campaign Website So You Don't Have To
Ok, so I couldn't help myself: I went to barackobama.com and decided to learn how the affordable care act benefits me!
I learned that a) ObamaCare has kept my premiums down (despite my actual premiums having increased more than 80% since the passage of the Affordable Care Act; and that b) because I'm a woman, I'm entitled to insurance which covers checkups with my OB-GYN, birth control, and maternity care. Moreover, "by 2014, all insurance plans will cover maternity benefits—and your insurance company won't be able to charge you more than a man for the same policy."
Can someone explain to me why this is just? Why should a single man have to pay as much as a woman for an insurance plan that covers OB-GYN visits and maternity benefits when he cannot possibly benefit from these things?
Aug '10
Re: I Went to the Obama Campaign Website So You Don't Have To
Well, he can benefit indirectly from women having to pay less for OB-GYN visits and maternity benefits if his style is to get a bunch of women pregnant and then not stick around.
Just sayin'.
Re: I Went to the Obama Campaign Website So You Don't Have To
Midget Faded Rattlesnake
Well, hecan benefit indirectly from women having to pay less for OB-GYN visits and maternity benefits if his style is to get a bunch of women pregnant and then not stick around.
Just sayin'. · 15 minutes ago
Oh right. And this is exactly the type of man that Obama's America fosters — the sort that feels entitled to everything, responsible for nothing, and accountable to no one.
Re: I Went to the Obama Campaign Website So You Don't Have To
It pulled the picture for me. But it's nice to know that his campaign is an international affair. Like the O'Bama St. Patrick's Day best-selling t-shirts: it's a (oh, come on, is this for real?) crowd-pleaser.
Sep '10
Re: I Went to the Obama Campaign Website So You Don't Have To
Attempting to describe their verbiage within the ricochet coc, I realized that any reference of this text to any sort of fertilizer does a great insult ...to fertilizer.
Re: I Went to the Obama Campaign Website So You Don't Have To
Don't forget to visit the store. Show your solidarity with the 99% by wearing a fargin’ SIXTY-FIVE DOLLAR grey hoodie.
Then send in your pictures to the official site for posting pictures of yourself expressing an illusionary sense of intimacy, my.barackobama.com. Yes, it’s an official campaign site.
Want more? Check out this Rachel Roy $55 flag shirt:
The “Flag code” says the flag should not be worn as clothing. Also: “The flag should never have placed upon it, nor on any part of it, nor attached to it any mark, insignia, letter, word, figure, design, picture, or drawing of any nature.” I suppose they get away with it because the colors are all red, so it's not a proper flag.
The page also has an inspirational quote: ''People who believe that change is possible are the ones who make it happen.''
Doesn't that just renew your faith in change? Of course, those who believe in the same old ideas often hasten change because they prolong an unsustainable construct until its demolition is inevitable. But that's no fun. Let's increase tax rates instead. THAT's some changetastic thinking.
Apr '11
Re: I Went to the Obama Campaign Website So You Don't Have To
James Lileks: Don't forget to visit the store. Show your solidarity with the 99% by wearing a fargin’ SIXTY-FIVE DOLLAR grey hoodie.
Then send in your pictures to the official site for posting pictures of yourself expressing an illusionary sense of intimacy, my.barackobama.com. Yes, it’s an official campaign site.
Want more? Check out this Rachel Roy $55 flag shirt:
I'm ashamed to say that I feel mildly envious of the Obama store. I wear my Mitt '08 gear quite a lot, but the store was then, and is now, kind of spartan. I can wear it in the house, or running errands, but I wouldn't wear it to a non-political event for non-political reasons. This cycle, on our side, Newt seems to have the best store, including this item that even Obama lacks.
While the flag code is pretty clear, and while it does make me feel somewhat guilty for wearing flagged clothing myself, I've seen enough great America patriots also wearing them (attorney General Mukasey, for instance, comes to mind) that I don't feel that I can blame myself or Obama too wholeheartedly.
Apr '11
Re: I Went to the Obama Campaign Website So You Don't Have To
Oh, I was wrong. Not only is there a dog bandana, but there is a dog tee and a dog sweater, along with relatively inoffensive leashes, collars, food bowls etc. Counterintuitively, they're listed under "essentials".
Apr '11
Re: I Went to the Obama Campaign Website So You Don't Have To
OK. Last post of my sulking that no GOP campaign has the clothing quality or range that Ricochet was able to put together: If you're going to complain about overpriced grey hoodies, I think that this one is uglier and worse value at NINETY-FIVE DOLLAR[s].
Re: I Went to the Obama Campaign Website So You Don't Have To
James Of England
James Lileks: Don't forget to visit the store. Show your solidarity with the 99% by wearing a fargin’ SIXTY-FIVE DOLLAR grey hoodie.
Then send in your pictures to the official site for posting pictures of yourself expressing an illusionary sense of intimacy, my.barackobama.com. Yes, it’s an official campaign site.
Want more? Check out this Rachel Roy $55 flag shirt:
I'm ashamed to say that I feel mildly envious of the Obama store. I wear my Mitt '08 gear quite a lot, but the store was then, and is now, kind of spartan. I can wear it in the house, or running errands, but I wouldn't wear it to a non-political event for non-political reasons. This cycle, on our side, Newt seems to have the best store, including this item that even Obama lacks.
I'm a little envious too. And also super annoyed that all these designers that I kinda sorta like have thrown their efforts behind Obama.