High Heels
Another thought from this morning's subway ride. (How many Ricochet posts can I make from a single subway ride? Place your bets!) I hate being trapped in a subway car. I hate being trapped in an airplane. I hate being in any enclosed space from which I can't run. I avoid as best I can any situation I can't get away from, quickly. And you know, I don't think that's just neurotic claustrophobia. It's pretty unobjectionable to say that any time you're trapped with no exits, you're vulnerable.
So I'm looking around me and looking at all the women in high heels. I hate high heels, too. I almost never wear them--if I'm going to be on television and they're going to film my feet, I'll do it, but basically, I hate them. I hate them because I can't run in them, and that makes me feel like a declawed, limping target.
I'm obviously really a minority among women. But why?
I think the proper conservative stance on high heels is firmly opposed. No one should give up her first line of self-defense in the expectation of protection by the nanny state.
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Comments :
Jul '10
Re: High Heels
Well, Claire, I find a woman who wears high heels while packing heat to be irresistibly alluring.
Sep '10
Re: High Heels
Kenneth beat me to it. The conservative position (quit sniggering in the back row -- I can see all of you) is that a woman's constitutional right to keep and bare heels is dependent upon a woman's constitutional right to keep and bare arms. Especially a Glock with a SureFire tactical light.
Re: High Heels
Yeah, yeah. I knew that was coming. But think about it, really. I won't ask, "Have you ever tried to walk in high heels?" because I know you won't admit to it if you have, but I'm not kidding--you put them on and you enter this enfeebled world in which you just can't move freely, and in which, in fact, it hurts to walk and is nearly impossible to run. The fact that women do this to themselves is, when you think about it, very weird.
Re: High Heels
I'm overruling your objection, Claire.
And Rex Ryan would like a word with you.
May '10
Re: High Heels
What is it with you and the shoes Claire?
May '10
Re: High Heels
Some of the most beautiful, mysterious and alluring women I've ever known carried themselves magnificently in Converse Hi-Tops and jeans. Hi-Tops would probably not work with a mid-length skirt however.
Here in Berkeley some dudes go around in knee-length kilts and accessorize with hiking or army boots. Maybe they save the high heels for behind closed doors?
Aug '10
Re: High Heels
Hey, stiletto heels makes handy improvised weapons. What's this about first line of defense?
You can always ditch your heels if you flee.
Edited on Jan 19, 2011 at 9:24amSep '10
Re: High Heels
I do agree with you that its weird. Attractive for men, but weird for the ladies. I do know some women who really like wearing heels, and feel strange if they aren't, but that's the minority position.
That said, a former hairstylist snapped her ankle in 3 places when she fell off her platform heels at the bar intoxicated. Yuck.
May '10
Re: High Heels
High heels make you feel vulnerable??? If you were a real conservative woman, you'd have stiletto heels that fire flechettes.
Or flechette heels that fire stilettos. Or something.
Aug '10
Re: High Heels
Not that I should talk, as I ran around barefoot most of the temperate months until a few nasty incidents involving broken glass on college campuses (did you know calluses are much less effective in the rain?).
May '10
Re: High Heels
If more women wore high heels, they wouldn't always be asking men to reach things for them.
I'd advise against dating Turkish officials in the future.
Re: High Heels
What are you talking about, Trace? Have I ever mentioned shoes here before? This is a completely original subject on Ricochet.
Oct '10
Re: High Heels
Claire, the concept of women not being dependent on the rest of society is relatively new. At least this isn't as bad as Chinese girls breaking and deforming their feet. Maybe the thinking is "my status in society depends on pleasing others; thus appearance trumps safety or physical capability"?
May '10
Re: High Heels
Spot on, Claire.
I had a conversation once with a FAA crash inspector, who told me no woman should ever board a plane wearing high heels and/or thermoplastic materials.
It gave me a most unshakable mental image of myself unable to run from a burning jet while my pantyhose melted.
While I miss the days when fellow air travelers wore snappy attire, I will opt for comfy leather flats and denim.
Sep '10
Re: High Heels
Claire Berlinski, Ed.
What are you talking about, Trace? Have I ever mentioned shoes here before? This is a completely original subject on Ricochet. · Jan 19 at 9:24am
(Must suppress urge to make Maxwell Smart shoe phone joke, Cone of Silence, Larabee, Ninety-Nine, Laser Blazer).
Jul '10
Re: High Heels
Claire, Claire. What else would I wear with my fishnet stockings?
Jun '10
Re: High Heels
I always thought that women wore high heels because it creates two favorable optical illusions at once: it makes them look taller and makes their feet look shorter.
Re: High Heels
Did I mention I'm sitting here with my foot elevated thanks to bunion surgery? Nothing says "middle aged" like bunion surgery. Given that I've been forced into Uggs for heaven knows how many months, I'm going to say "yes" to high heels or any other heel for that matter. But really, conservative women in high heels really bug the gals on left in their Birkenstocks, which is another reason to wear them, don't you think?
Re: High Heels
By the way, it's all kind of connected in my mind--one reason it didn't bother me to think I might be going up the wrong escalator was that if I had to run back down the escalator, it wouldn't have been a big deal. But if I'd been wearing high heels? A very big deal. So you see, the link between high heels and authoritarianism is very clear. Put them on, and you're more or less saying, "Government, enslave me." You follow me? (If you can't keep up, Pseud, try changing your shoes.)
Sep '10
Re: High Heels
Mary Beth while convalescing with her feet up said:
But really, conservative women in high heels really bug the gals on left in their Birkenstocks, which is another reason to wear them, don't you think?
Excellent point. Perhaps an amendment to the tax code is in order? A "flats" tax?
Edited on Jan 19, 2011 at 9:37am