God Is Not Allowed to Ride the San Francisco MUNI
"Some people call him Jesus, some people call him Buddha, some people call him Allah," an elderly black homeless woman preached as I climbed aboard a bus on the #3 Line on the way home from a dentist appointment. "But whatever you want to call him, the point is that he's God. And he LOVES you!" she shouted, so that everyone --even the forlorn looking youths at the back of the bus with their earbuds blasting mp3s into their ears--could hear her message.
At that moment, the bus driver slammed on the brakes, put her into park, and got up out of his seat to wag his finger in the face of our Universalist evangelist and inform her that there was to be "no religion, none whatsoever on this bus. Because you know why? Because you might be a Christian, and I might be no religion, and that woman over there..." and as he pointed at a woman in a full, black burqa, the bus driver began to look a little uncomfortable, "she might be...some la la blah blah blah religion. So no religion on this bus."
"Yessir," our preacher mumbled. But as the bus driver resumed his seat, she couldn't help but conclude her sermon with some closing thoughts. "It's just that I really don't want to see another 9/11 happen. And I want folks to know that God loves them."
Profound, absurd, and so quintessentially San Francisco.
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Jun '10
Re: God Is Not Allowed to Ride the San Francisco MUNI
I used to ride the #7 Haight St quite a bit, and Fillmore was where the church ladies got on, Sundays. They did a little preaching to me, but only if I sat close-by. To stop them was unthinkable. That was the Early '80s.
Re: God Is Not Allowed to Ride the San Francisco MUNI
I was shocked to discover that the right to free speech does not exist on a public bus. Or maybe it's just that separation of church and municipal bus takes precedence when the two are in conflict.
May '10
Re: God Is Not Allowed to Ride the San Francisco MUNI
While I'm sympathetic to her message, I wouldn't like it if I was trapped on the 1 California by some guy preaching the virtues of his religion, politics, business opportunity, or whatever. Off the bus, free speech reigns, because then we can at least get away from the stuff we don't like.
Seems to me that the bus driver has the right to enforce noise standards on his ride, although I don't like how he singled out religious speech as he did.
Re: God Is Not Allowed to Ride the San Francisco MUNI
Ottoman Umpire:
Seems to me that the bus driver has the right to enforce noise standards on his ride, although I don't like how he singled out religious speech as he did. · Aug 30 at 4:43pm
Agreed. Someone shouting on the bus about anything is annoying, so he could've just told her to quiet down. But he went on his own mini-lecture about how she couldn't speak about religion because it might offend someone. That's what I found strange...
Dec '10
Re: God Is Not Allowed to Ride the San Francisco MUNI
Diane Ellis, Ed.
That's what I found strange... · Aug 30 at 4:50pm
Ironic what is found strange in California...
Apr '11
Re: God Is Not Allowed to Ride the San Francisco MUNI
Diane Ellis, Ed.
Ottoman Umpire:
Seems to me that the bus driver has the right to enforce noise standards on his ride, although I don't like how he singled out religious speech as he did. · Aug 30 at 4:43pm
Agreed. Someone shouting on the bus about anything is annoying, so he could've just told her to quiet down. But he went on his own mini-lecture about how she couldn't speak about religion because it might offend someone. That's what I found strange... · Aug 30 at 4:50pm
Who knew that the arbitrator of what is acceptable speech was a bus driver. I wonder if there would be the same abolition of political speech? Let's say this elderly black women was pontificating about the greatness of Obama. Because you know why? He might be a Republican, she might be a Libertarian...
Re: God Is Not Allowed to Ride the San Francisco MUNI
Give Me Liberty
Diane Ellis, Ed.
Ottoman Umpire:
Seems to me that the bus driver has the right to enforce noise standards on his ride, although I don't like how he singled out religious speech as he did. · Aug 30 at 4:43pm
Agreed. Someone shouting on the bus about anything is annoying, so he could've just told her to quiet down. But he went on his own mini-lecture about how she couldn't speak about religion because it might offend someone. That's what I found strange... · Aug 30 at 4:50pm
Who knew that the arbitrator of what is acceptable speech was a bus driver. I wonder if there would be the same abolition of political speech?
Only one way to find out. Ricochet undercover on the SF Muni!
Aug '10
Re: God Is Not Allowed to Ride the San Francisco MUNI
Long ago I used to ride the 3 Jacks from Powell Street Station to Pacific Heights, no one ever preached to me, but I did encounter a vampire.
No, really. At least she was certain she was a vampire.
I was just getting off the up escalator and the crowd in the plaza was thick. Then all of a sudden the crowd just parted in front me. I looked down for a moment and when I looked up again there was a very tall, very beautiful, very crazy-eyed mulatta (is that word ok?) walking right at me.
She was 6 feet tall and dressed like Elvira, but she was hotter. She was wearing a big black pointy-collared cape. Really.
She was hallucinating. Her eyes gave me chills, but her decolletage pulled focus.
My fight or flight instinct got shorted out by my leer instinct so I just froze like a deer in her headlights.
She bumped full into me then slipped me like a defensive linemen, her cape slid over my shoulder and I half expected to get bit.
I survived.
Several people approached me and asked if I was alright. Very strange, I'll never forget it.
Oct '10
Re: God Is Not Allowed to Ride the San Francisco MUNI
That's a beautiful story. Rob Long, if you ever feel like pitching an artsy short film. . .
Jul '10
Re: God Is Not Allowed to Ride the San Francisco MUNI
To where is the "homeless woman" headed that She needed to catch a bus?
Jun '10
Re: God Is Not Allowed to Ride the San Francisco MUNI
If that is how the gospel is going to be preached, best that it is not. Both the driver and that woman are destined for the hot place. I am sure Heaven has a sign "No San Franciscans Allowed"
Dec '10
Re: God Is Not Allowed to Ride the San Francisco MUNI
Give Me Liberty
Who knew that the arbitrator of what is acceptable speech was a bus driver. I wonder if there would be the same abolition of political speech? Let's say this elderly black women was pontificating about the greatness of Obama. Because you know why? He might be a Republican, she might be a Libertarian... · Aug 30 at 4:58pm
I think "Obama ackbar!" is legal on every bus in San Francisco.
Aug '10
Re: God Is Not Allowed to Ride the San Francisco MUNI
She wasn't homeless, her get up looked pretty pricey.
I suspect she was deep in to some serious juju.
This was The City in the early eighties, there were Goth girls running around at Chili Peppers gigs, those gals were twenty years ahead of their time.
I suspect she was in to something similar, but darker and freakier. She was serious business, that crowd back moved quick.
Jul '10
Re: God Is Not Allowed to Ride the San Francisco MUNI
God, I wish that happened on the New York City subway system. My morning commute would be a lot more peaceful.
Re: God Is Not Allowed to Ride the San Francisco MUNI
Squishy Blue RINO
She wasn't homeless, her get up looked pretty pricey.
I suspect she was deep in to some serious juju.
This was The City in the early eighties, there were Goth girls running around at Chili Peppers gigs, those gals were twenty years ahead of their time.
I suspect she was in to something similar, but darker and freakier. She was serious business, that crowd back moved quick. · Aug 30 at 6:42pm
The "homeless woman" in my bus had her own shopping cart filled with her belongings on the bus with her. So I assume she's homeless in the literal sense.
Dec '10
Re: God Is Not Allowed to Ride the San Francisco MUNI
I'm just chuckling at the proselytizing evangelical unitarian:
"Jesus is my flight attendant."
"I have a close, personal relationship with God, as close as with anybody on the internet."
"Lift up your prayers so that they may be answered. By a form letter."
"God has a plan for you. But you have to pass on to see what's in it."
"Our parent in someplace, hollow be thy name..."
"No one religion is better than any other. Including atheism. ... What?"
"There is only one God, but sometimes He uses aliases."
"Let us pray: To whom it may concern..."
I should stop. That's not fair. I'm sure she's a sweet, well-meaning woman who wants only the best for everyone and has very sincere beliefs.
I still think it's funny, though.
Dec '10
Re: God Is Not Allowed to Ride the San Francisco MUNI
Diane Ellis, Ed.
The "homeless woman" in my bus had her own shopping cart filled with her belongings on the bus with her. So I assume she's homeless in the literal sense. · Aug 30 at 6:49pm
Home is where the heart is. I'd think San Francisco has a pretty high millage rate on most bodily organs.
Jul '10
Re: God Is Not Allowed to Ride the San Francisco MUNI
AmishDude
Home is where the heart is. I'd think San Francisco has a pretty high millage rate on most bodily organs. · Aug 30 at 6:58pm
Hmmm... I don't think so.
Dec '10
Re: God Is Not Allowed to Ride the San Francisco MUNI
I'm befuddled by this comment. How else is the gospel supposed to be preached??? And why is it so offensive that someone tells you that God loves you? Honestly, grow up, people.
Aug '10
Re: God Is Not Allowed to Ride the San Francisco MUNI
Diane Ellis, Ed.
Squishy Blue RINO
She wasn't homeless, her get up looked pretty pricey.
I suspect she was deep in to some serious juju.
This was The City in the early eighties, there were Goth girls running around at Chili Peppers gigs, those gals were twenty years ahead of their time.
I suspect she was in to something similar, but darker and freakier. She was serious business, that crowd back moved quick. · Aug 30 at 6:42pm
The "homeless woman" in my bus had her own shopping cart filled with her belongings on the bus with her. So I assume she's homeless in the literal sense. · Aug 30 at 6:49pm
Sorry about that, I misunderstood who he was referring to.