Floreat Etona
Eton is the best school in the whole world, I think we can all agree on that. It's not just that it has the coolest uniforms, the handsomest buildings, the most reverend traditions and the most impressive list of alumni - including Hugh "House" Laurie and Dominic "The Wire" West - but also that, for such an elitist institution, it is quite incredibly meritocratic.
When we took Boy Delingpole to look round it, we were impressed beyond measure. Mrs D in particular had expected much snobbish aloofness. Instead what we found is a school with superb pastoral care, inspired teaching staff and an intense desire to bring out the best in every boy whatever his talents and interests.
But there are two major problems with the place as far as I can see.
1. The education and facilities are so superior that your life after Eton is one massive anti-climax.
2. It encourages in a certain kind of person a disastrous combination of superiority and complacency.
The latter, I fear, may provide one explanation as to why our current Prime Minister David Cameron is shaping to be the worst in British history. So confident is he that he was born to rule that he has never stopped to question what kind of service he might offer to the nation in return for the privilege. With the economy in such a parlous state and the EU on the verge of collapse, what we need in charge of Britain is a visionary like Churchill and Thatcher, not a managerial third-rater like Cameron.
Perhaps future historians will judge that Britain's tragedy was that Cameron went to Eton. Perhaps if, like Churchill, he'd gone to (inferior) Harrow it would have made him less complacent and spurred him onto greater things.
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Apr '11
Re: Floreat Etona
Although I went to Wellington, my brother went to Eton and he and those of his friends that I know have, without exception, gone on to do precisely what they wanted to do, to do it well, and with energy. There are some prominent unhappy Old Etonians, but my wife and I plan to put our first boy down for the school as our highest priority when such a child becomes apparent, despite the hassles of intercontinental boarding. Like amusingly flavored crisps, Eton is something that Britain does better than the US. Unlike the crisps, which China excels at, Eton is also something that Britain does better than anywhere else in the world. I'm not sure I can name a second category in which our Sceptered Isle leads the world today by the same clear margin.
Mar '11
Re: Floreat Etona
Eton provides lists of its most famous alumni by linking to Wikipedia?
Oct '10
Re: Floreat Etona
I don't ask this snarkily, I've got a streak of Anglophilia a mile wide, but Eton does what better than the rest of the world? Making boys into Etonians that will lead Britain to be better at nothing but producing more Etonians and flavored potato chips on par with China's? Am I missing something?
James, if you'd gone to Eton I'm betting you'd be a little more skeptical of Romney. Is Wellington known for wide-eyed naivete?
Edit: Both my paragraphs were directed at James of England. We all know James D's school produced properly skeptical citizens.
Edited on Dec 6, 2011 at 5:30amMar '11
Re: Floreat Etona
Well, you beat yourselves over the head better than just about everybody else.
It sure makes being an Anglophile a thankless job.
Apr '11
Re: Floreat Etona
The English, they make virtue out of necessity.
Sep '10
Re: Floreat Etona
I've always been more than mildly envious of Eton after reading of Ronald Knox's Etonian pedigree. There is an amusing passage from Ignatius Press's book written by Milton Walsh on Knox called Ronald Knox as Apologist: wit, laughter, and the Popish Creed that our contributors and commenters from across the pond will find amusing and vaguely chilling at the same time, particularly as it regards Mr. Cameron who -- if I understand Mr. Delingpole correctly -- he views as the quintessential British incarnation of TS Eliot's Hollow Man:
I'll add to James's list. The flaw at Eton is not really Eton's fault. Britain is a civilizational disaster and a moral train wreck. The pastoral setting of Eton prepares a boy for a civilization which no longer exists. Unfortunately, most of his confreres will think it does. It takes an iconoclast to tell them differently.
Re: Floreat Etona
Come on, James, let's be honest about flaw number three: "Eton" and "buggery" are synonymous.
Sep '10
Re: Floreat Etona
I never thought I would live to see the day when I would have to mention Code of Conduct to an editor. Surely there's a vague piano leg euphemism you could use instead.
Apr '11
Re: Floreat Etona
Man, that's cold!
Mar '11
Re: Floreat Etona
It's almost as bad as a Turkish prison, Joey!
Sep '10
Re: Floreat Etona
Basil Fawlty
It's almost as bad as a Turkish prison, Joey! · Dec 6 at 5:41am
Well played, sir.
Sep '10
Re: Floreat Etona
Pseudodionysius
I never thought I would live to see the day when I would have to mention Code of Conduct to an editor. Surely there's a vague piano leg euphemism you could use instead. · Dec 6 at 5:33am
"unauthorized conveyance" would be my first choice.
Mar '11
Re: Floreat Etona
I just call it Platonic Love
Aug '10
Re: Floreat Etona
Ouch!
On the other hand, Eton gave us Captain Hook.
Re: Floreat Etona
@Claire. Wrong school, Claire. I think you're thinking Winchester. Wyckhamists like that sort of thing. They develop a taste for it because of all the sitting on the fence they do.
Apr '11
Re: Floreat Etona
ROFLMAO!
Sep '11
Re: Floreat Etona
Sending your son away to boarding school at the age of 8 (to prepare him for Eton et al at age 13) is not regarded a s normal even in the UK. The buggery, Claire, stems from them being single sex, and is ubiquitous. In the co-eds, the paedophilia is more er, generalised. But most British people like to have their children at home with them, just like everyone else. By the way, James, I never thought post-Thatcher that we'd ever again find ourselves ruled by a streetful of Old Etonians and I can't imagine she would approve. I wish your son well, but do try to head him away from politics.
Aug '10
Re: Floreat Etona
i would think twice about sending my son to any school named after a dandified rocker.
ELTON may be a great school, but Benny and the Jets does not a curriculum make.
and i heard that Abba has been the opposing team on the playing field..or something along those lines.
was it Waterloo or Fernando ?
Edited on Dec 6, 2011 at 8:07amRe: Floreat Etona
@gabycharing What rot! I was never buggered once at prep school or public school - and this was back in the 70s and 80s when boarding schools were much less PC and child-protective than they are now. Nor, so far as I'm aware was a single one of my friends. Sure mild faute-de-mieux homosexual activity went on; no doubt some boys somewhere went all the way. But it wasn't compulsory. Or even usual.
As for your "isn't normal" judgement on boarding schools: Well, nor is academic rigor normal in the British education. Nor is discipline. Nor is regular sporting activity. You're saying, what, that abnormality makes something wrong? No: I expect loads more parents would send their kids to public schools if they could afford it, the education provided being the finest in the world.
I'm proud that my boy's at boarding school. In fact, given the joy I've seen him experience being surrounded 24/7 in term time by his play mates with brilliant sporting facilities, it strikes me that the real cruelty would be deny him experience and keep him cooped up at home.
Mar '11
Re: Floreat Etona
Pseudodionysius
I never thought I would live to see the day when I would have to mention Code of Conduct to an editor. Surely there's a vague piano leg euphemism you could use instead. · Dec 6 at 5:33am
Oh come on. If Winston Churchill could get away with publicly describing the traditions of the Royal Navy as "Rum, Sodomy and the Lash", I think Claire can use the word "Buggery".