Creepiest Children's Book Ever Poll
As a child I never much liked the Cat in the Hat, he just took way too much license with those nice kids, but it wasn't until I had kids of my own that my eyes were opened to the madness that occasionally calls children's books home. While the reasons for my new found discomfort with Hop on Pop might be readily apparent, there are far darker visions lurking in the webbed corners of our social strata, waiting to disturb our tender youth.
Mollie just mentioned one in another conversation, Love You Forever, for ages 4-8, about an obsessive mother that is still sneaking into bed with her son when he has moved away and has a home of his own.
A Sisyphus family example is Rainbow Fish, for ages 1-3, about a colorful fish that allows other fish to pull his scales off in hopes of being liked. Each of the little Sisyphuses rejected this book in their own, special way.
So here is the deal. Nominate a book below or "like" the nomination(s) you agree top all of the others. The title(s) with the most likes at the end are the creepiest children's books ever. The only rule is nothing written before 1900. The moderns simply would be outgunned by the original Brothers Grimm, for example.
I'll count up and declare a "winner" in 24 hours.
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Jan '11
Re: Creepiest Children's Book Ever Poll
This person captures my feelings about Hop on Pop perfectly.
let us consider the case of Mr. Brown, who is having an affair, cheating on his wife with Mr. Black. You doubt me? Look into the book, you find the caption "Mr. Brown, Mrs. Brown," with a picture of the couple. Both are smiling, but they show no physical intimacy at all. They are not even touching. Why not? Well, in the facing page, we see "Mr. Brown, Upside-Down," and a picture of Mr. Brown standing on his head. Something isn't right with Mr. Brown. Something about him is quite upside-down.
Later (after being catapulted through the sky by a puppy on a seesaw), Mr. Brown has a little sexual adventure. We read the question: "Where is Brown? There is Brown! Mr. Brown is out of town." So far, so good. Then we read "Back, Black, Brown came back. Brown came back with Mr. Black." This time, Brown and Black are pictured holding hands, in a pose of intimacy denied Mrs. Brown. In fact, Mrs. Brown seems banished from the book, as later on Mr. Brown and Mr. Black have a picnic, and she's not invited.
Dec '10
Re: Creepiest Children's Book Ever Poll
One of the classic Curious George books has him break his arm during his high jinks. While recovering at the hospital he happens upon a big jug of ether and proceeds to go on a trip. Take that, cigarettes in popular culture!
Jan '11
Re: Creepiest Children's Book Ever Poll
I'm going to also nominate "T is for Terrible" by Peter McCarty. It's essentially an apology for serial killers. The message is that we shouldn't judge horrible creatures who kill others, it's not their fault, that's just how they were born. It starts out building up sympathy for a T-Rex showing how he has no friends because everyone is afraid, and how he really doesn't like being so big and menacing. You think it's going to resolve with him finding a way to make friends and curb his terrible appetites. Instead it ends showing him terrorizing a pack of dinosaurs he is about to devour. Horrible book, despite it's extremely beautiful illustrations (which is what lured me into buying the book in the first place).
Video of the first few pages here.
Dec '10
Re: Creepiest Children's Book Ever Poll
Why are you limiting it to his NYT writing?
Mar '11
Re: Creepiest Children's Book Ever Poll
Cecil Bunions is a weirdly disturbing book. The illustrations definitely make me sleep uneasily.
Re: Creepiest Children's Book Ever Poll
Actually, Krugman could be a great author for kid's books. Some nights I struggle sleeping, so I looked online to see what other people suggest to help fall sleep. I just went back and found the article I read, because it has a great quote:
What Paul Krugman piece isn't about "purple Twinkies walking on walls... chasing after bankers?" He'd put a kid asleep in seconds.
Aug '11
Re: Creepiest Children's Book Ever Poll
I don't know if "Creepy" is the right word exactly, but one Caldecott winner that I absolutely detest is Smoky Night. It's the story of a couple kids, frightened out of their wits, while dealing with an inner-city riot. And it's an award-winning picture book! What I loathe about it is that it present riots as these things that just happen every now and then -- no reason is given why it happens, and no resolution is given either. I think it borders on abusive to send a message to kids that riots are just a sort of norm when you live in the inner-city.
These One-Star reviews from Amazon nail all the issues I have with the book.
Edited on September 9, 2011 at 5:22pmApr '11
Re: Creepiest Children's Book Ever Poll
Oh gosh -- Love You Forever is so creepy!!! I was once at a family camp where they read that one as a bedtime story for the kids, and a father sitting next to me commented that he would, "punch [his] mother in the mouth" if she ever tried anything like that. I wholeheartedly concur. Of course, nearly every Munsch book is unsettling in some way.
Another creepy book to me is Burton and Dudley. It's the story of two possums that go for a walk. We used to read it to our daughter. The storyline was a bit -- off -- and what made it worse was that my husband would read one of the character's dialogue with a Jimmy Carter accent.
And, though not exactly creepy, my husband hates the book of impossible one-upmanship that is Guess How Much I Love You. Why does Big Rabbit have to be such a jerk?
(Reading the one-star reviews of Love You Forever on Amazon is a hoot!)
May '10
Re: Creepiest Children's Book Ever Poll
The Butter Battle Book by Dr. Seuss.
Teaches children the ills of Mutually Assured Destruction.
Re: Creepiest Children's Book Ever Poll
The Tenth Good Thing About Barney. Little kid's cat dies. He's sad, so his mother tells him to think of ten nice things about the cat. Kid gets stuck on nine. Finally realizes, “His rotting carcass is fertilizing plants!” The end. What the content-violation?!
Aug '11
Re: Creepiest Children's Book Ever Poll
I don't care much for Where the Wild Things Are, but Sendak's In the Night Kitchen is way creepy. It's been controversial because it shows a naked little boy, pee-pee and all. But the storyline -- such as it is -- is a Freudian nightmare. (Or maybe sometimes a cigar is just a cigar.)
Nov '10
Re: Creepiest Children's Book Ever Poll
No matter where anyone stands on the issue of homosexuality, these books intended to desensitize children to it at very young ages are just creepy.
Heather Has Two Mommies Reading level: Ages 4-8
Mommy, Mama, & Me Reading level: Baby-Preschool (Companion book: Daddy, Papa, & Me)
And Tango Makes Three Reading level: Ages 4-8
Daddy's Roommate Reading level: Ages 4-8
Of course, that's just my opinion, I could be wrong.
Aug '10
Re: Creepiest Children's Book Ever Poll
Everyone Poops.
Edited on September 9, 2011 at 6:31pmAug '10
Re: Creepiest Children's Book Ever Poll
Not creepy, but kinda confusing: Instructions by Neil Gaiman
May '10
Re: Creepiest Children's Book Ever Poll
The Lorax. My kids seem to be fine with it, but it creeps me out.
Also, at what point between my childhood and parenthood did the Berenstain Bears become to the Sierra Club what Smokey the Bear is to the U.S. Forest Service?
Mar '11
Re: Creepiest Children's Book Ever Poll
"There was an Old Lady Who Swallowed a Fly?" She keeps eating weird things then finally eats a horse and dies. Granted it is loosely based on an old folk tale but it is demented for a kids story.
Edited on September 9, 2011 at 7:40pmNov '10
Re: Creepiest Children's Book Ever Poll
Misthiocracy: Everyone Poops. · Sep 9 at 9:29am
Edited on Sep 09 at 09:31 am
But it makes a great gag gift....
May '11
Re: Creepiest Children's Book Ever Poll
Love: Click, Clack, Moo. Love: Where's My Cow by Terry Pratchett.
I'm not much of a fan of most of Dr. Suess. "Love you Forever" is kinda creepy, but the sentiment is probably comforting to a small child. (i.e. Your parents will always love you.)
Apr '11
Re: Creepiest Children's Book Ever Poll
Right.
I think my kids recognized Love You Forever as an example of adults acting absurdly (like the traditional tale of a man who switches places with his wife for a day and ends up on the cottage roof with the cow, a rope, and the baby as hilarity ensues). Well, I think they did. I did, anyway. Little kids just might find it reassuring; until the Don't-Touch-Me-There Bear gets his claws into them, pre-schoolers have no idea that the mother is obsessive and acting inappropriately.
Let me also cast a counter-vote in favor of WTWTA. "Let the wild rumpus begin" is advice every kid should get. It helped me win my sweetie's heart.
Jul '10
Re: Creepiest Children's Book Ever Poll
Please don't take the Cat in the Hat thing personally. Some of my best friends are cats.