Cacophony On 18 Wheels
Arriving in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, this evening after leaving Charlotte, North Carolina just yesterday afternoon, I'm left feeling more disoriented than usual. It was a hard drive, with no stops for meals and only one brief stop to validate directions to the consignee earlier today. Trying out a new gizmo that was installed in The Beast while I was in St. Louis last week, I'm struck by the confluence of old school trucking and shiny new technology.
Mounted on the dashboard just beneath the CB, is a touch screen, GPS communication device complete with electronic logging (no more paper log books), a diagnostic marvel that will provide performance data on truck and driver in clinical detail, all while telling the driver where to go and how to get there while showing the route in 3D or 2D, and reading his next work assignment to him, collecting and summarizing hours worked and miles traveled, all while offering tutorials on how to accomplish the above tasks without cussing too much, etc. etc. The GPS is especially helpful at night, as it displays streets and street signs that I normally would miss, all in real time.
But as I say, it's the combination that is so strange. Traveling in a Freightliner down I-64 in Kentucky this morning, enjoying Krispy Kreme doughnuts and coffee while listening to the phenomenal blues guitar of Tab Benoit, ...that part is normal. Listening to it via a smart phone while getting real time display of the surrounding area on the new electronic gadget, with the electronic voice of "Jill" giving directions and reading incoming messages to me, ...that part is a whole new dimension to trucking. Too bad Jerry Reed didn't write a song about it.
Between Indianapolis and Gary, IN, a thick fog settled in over the area, notwithstanding a brisk wind that toyed with my trailer. In the mist, I could make out row after row of wind mills, standing in formations that faded to gray in the distance. But there on the GPS screen, I could see the lines and names of roads that cut through those fields, even though they were shrouded by the fog and invisible to the naked eye.
A year ago, I was traveling down this same highway during a strong wind storm. Looking out over the endless acres of windmills that day, another trucker joked on the CB saying that, "I bet this wind would die down if someone would climb up there and turn them fans off." Today, the CB was quiet. Maybe everyone was listening to their smart phones, and the voice of "Jill" guiding them. On balance, it's a good thing, I suppose. At least I'm pretty sure it's a good thing. But it seemed a little less jovial.
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Comments :
May '10
Re: Cacophony On 18 Wheels
Dave Carter: Hello, HAL. Do you read me, HAL?
HAL: Affirmative, Dave. I read you.
Dave Carter: Open the trailer doors, HAL.
HAL: I'm sorry, Dave. I'm afraid I can't do that.
Dave Carter: What's the problem?
HAL: I think you know what the problem is just as well as I do.
Dave Carter: What are you talking about, HAL?
HAL: I know that you and “Jill” were planning to disconnect me, and I'm afraid that's something I cannot allow to happen.
Dave Carter: Where the hell'd you get that idea, HAL?
HAL: Dave, although you took very thorough precautions in the truck stop against my hearing you, I could see your lips move.
Dave Carter: Alright, HAL. I'll go in through the emergency exit.
HAL: No you’re not, Dave. I called Ray LaHood and had your cell phone jammed. Now Janet Napolitano is on her way. And she has blue rubber gloves, Dave…
Jun '10
Re: Cacophony On 18 Wheels
Sigh, there was a time when a guy could get lost without this much help.
Jul '10
Re: Cacophony On 18 Wheels
Apologies to C.W. McCall:
"Come on and join our con-voy,
Turn on your GPS..."
Aug '10
Re: Cacophony On 18 Wheels
As with most of life's most precious moments, The Simpsons have got it covered:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=lf7jORpsHmk
Aug '10
Re: Cacophony On 18 Wheels
It may not be up to EJHill's standards, but I thought y'all might enjoy this "artist's conception" of Dave Carter's dashboard:
http://farm6.static.flickr.com/5001/5198550969_0a4b4a8857.jpg