My husband and I are recent graduates of the same highly selective private college, which shall remain nameless. Their alumni newsletters provide comedy gold.
Highlights from the latest edition:
[REDACTED] is an organizer with Milk Not Jails, a grassroots campaign working to build a new urban-rural alliance in New York.
From their website:
Milk Not Jails is an economic alternative to the prison industry. We are a dairy marketing and distribution co-operative and we are a political campaign building an alliance for a sustainable and just regional economy. We are building a regional economy that depends on bringing city residents local, healthy food, not locking them up.
We know that imprisonment hurts communities. Increased incarceration undermines local networks, increases crime and juvenile delinquency, and causes a decrease in everything from public health to housing values to political participation. And we know that dairy farms need help from consumers and policy-makers to succeed.
I'm not clear on how local milk is going to solve armed robbers terrorizing their neighbors. In fact, thinking about it makes my head hurt. Pity my expensive education didn't teach me how to resolve this...
In other news, they are soliciting donations for:
The other exciting thing on campus is the growing movement by the students to start a farm on campus. Students are raising funds from family and friends (and alumni/ae...again, call me) to match funds from the College. As spring nears, time is of the essence. This will be a farm program that is practical and academic, on the ground and in the classroom
My husband is an immigrant from what is tactfully called a "developing country" and I can't wait to tell my in laws, who grew up on rubber plantations, that after working their fingers to the bone for two decades to get their son to a top American school, students there can look forward to...being farmers again. (Not that there's anything wrong with being a farmer, but does it require a $200,000 education? Is this a wise use of donor dollars or what are supposedly the best and brightest youth in the country?)
On a lighter note, please enjoy the song which provides this post its title.