And Barack Obama Spoke All These Words, Saying...

Natalie · July 18, 2012 at 3:12pm

1. I am the government your god, which have brought you out of the land of Freedom. You shall have no other gods before me.

2. You shall make for yourselves any flattering likeness of me, and carry it with you out of your adoration for me: for I the government your god am a jealous god, visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children to the third and fourth generation of them that hate me, in the form of government debts and deficits. And showing mercy to millions of them that love me and keep my commandments in the form of welfare checks, extended unemployment and favorable regulation policies for campaign contributions. Selah.

3. You shall not take the name of the government your god in vain (which includes but is not limited to "Oh, my government", "government damn it", "Barack H Obama!").

4. Remember the sabbath day...No, I'm asking. I shot 6 over par that day.

5. Honour your father and your mother if you want: that your days may be long upon the land which the government your god gives you.

6. You shall not kill. I have my own list for that.

7. You shall not commit adultery without a really good reason like, you couldn't find a reason not to.

8. You shall not steal...unless you call it a tax, penalty, mandate, fee, surcharge, raising government revenue or fine.

9. You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor unless you are a liberal democrat or progressive.

10. You shall not covet your neighbors house, your neighbors wife, nor his ox, nor his ass nor anything that is your neighbors. Just be patient and eventually I the government your god will redistribute the wealth so you will have nothing to covet or be coveted.

I am the government your god and I have spoken.

Have I missed anything?

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show jetstream's comment (#1) ←

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Re: And Barack Obama Spoke All These Words, Saying...

jetstream

Natalie: ...

Alright! One of my neighbors has some very cool stuff, about how long will this take?

Edited on July 18, 2012 at 1:52am

#1 ·
July 18, 2012 at 1:51am ·
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show flownover's comment (#2) ←

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Re: And Barack Obama Spoke All These Words, Saying...

flownover

Called Wm Devane already for his gold. For some reason Gordon Liddy wasn't home .anybody have a blueprint for a calf .......?

Edited on July 18, 2012 at 2:25am

#2 ·
July 18, 2012 at 2:23am ·
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show Natalie's comment (#3) ←

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Re: And Barack Obama Spoke All These Words, Saying...

Natalie

flownover: Called Wm Devane already for his gold. For some reason Gordon Liddy wasn't home .anybody have a blueprint for a calf .......? · _{1 minute ago}

Edited 0 minutes ago

In another life I worked in a foundry, I'll call one of the guys from the pattern shop. Or we can just "redistribute" the one outside of the NYSE building...

Edited on July 18, 2012 at 2:33am

#3 ·
July 18, 2012 at 2:28am ·
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show Eeyore's comment (#4) ←

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Re: And Barack Obama Spoke All These Words, Saying...

Eeyore

Natalie:

2. You shall make for yourselves any flattering likeness of me, and carry it with you out of your adoration for me

Okay, kids - A new 3-part contest

1 - How long after Obama is out of office will it be proposed that his face replace someone on a Federal Reserve Note?

2 - Who will be the first person to seriously propose it? Sharpton? Jackson? Wasserman-Schultz? Schumer? Tingles? Larry O'Donnell? (not an exclusive list)

3 - Which denomination? No, $3 bill way too obvious.

#4 ·
July 18, 2012 at 3:47am ·
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→ show Dave Carter's comment (#5)

Re: And Barack Obama Spoke All These Words, Saying...

Dave Carter

Superb work!!

#5 ·
July 18, 2012 at 4:08am ·
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Amazon.com Widgets

show Natalie's comment (#6) ←

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Re: And Barack Obama Spoke All These Words, Saying...

Natalie

Dave Carter: Superb work!! · _{0 minutes ago}

Thanks Dave!

#6 ·
July 18, 2012 at 4:38am ·
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show Cornelius Julius Sebastian's comment (#7) ←

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Re: And Barack Obama Spoke All These Words, Saying...

Cornelius Julius Sebastian

Preach it sister! I nominate elevation to the MAIN FEED!!!

#7 ·
July 18, 2012 at 5:17am ·
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show Natalie's comment (#8) ←

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Re: And Barack Obama Spoke All These Words, Saying...

Natalie

jetstream

Natalie: ...

Alright! One of my neighbors has some very cool stuff, about how long will this take? · _{3 hours ago}

Edited 3 hours ago

We can't afford it...

#8 ·
July 18, 2012 at 5:17am ·
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show Natalie's comment (#9) ←

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Re: And Barack Obama Spoke All These Words, Saying...

Natalie

Eeyore

Natalie:

2. You shall make for yourselves any flattering likeness of me, and carry it with you out of your adoration for me

Okay, kids - A new 3-part contest

1 - How long after Obama is out of office will it be proposed that his face replace someone on a Federal Reserve Note?

2 - Who will be the first person toseriouslypropose it? Sharpton? Jackson? Wasserman-Schultz? Schumer? Tingles? Larry O'Donnell? (not an exclusive list)

3 - Which denomination? No, $3 bill way too obvious. · _{1 hour ago}

I'll propose it right now...put him on all the "change."

#9 ·
July 18, 2012 at 5:21am ·
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show Eeyore's comment (#10) ←

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Re: And Barack Obama Spoke All These Words, Saying...

Eeyore

Natalie

I'll propose it right now...put him on all the "change."

Ooo! Ooo! an idea...

Expanding on a proposal from Treasury and others:

Declare that Obama will be the new face on the penny, and, in the same Act, discontinue the penny.

#10 ·
July 18, 2012 at 5:33am ·
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show Natalie's comment (#11) ←

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Re: And Barack Obama Spoke All These Words, Saying...

Natalie

Eeyore

Natalie

I'll propose it right now...put him on all the "change."

Ooo! Ooo! an idea...

Expanding on a proposal from Treasury and others:

Declare that Obama will be the new face on the penny, and, in the same Act, discontinue the penny. · _{3 minutes ago}

love it!!!

#11 ·
July 18, 2012 at 5:39am ·
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show skipsul's comment (#12) ←

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Re: And Barack Obama Spoke All These Words, Saying...

skipsul

I would change #10 to:

You shall covet your neighbor's house, his ox, his Mercedes, his worldy posessions, and you shall report any inequities to Me, Your Lord, whereupon I shall send my angels of IRS to render judgement. But Woe be upon him who doth covet more than his share, for all shares belong to Me, your Lord!

#12 ·
July 18, 2012 at 3:17pm ·
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show ~Paules's comment (#13) ←

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Re: And Barack Obama Spoke All These Words, Saying...

~Paules

Eeyore

1 - How long after Obama is out of office will it be proposed that his face replace someone on a Federal Reserve Note?

Million dollar notes will be found in common circulation when inflation finally arrives. Should be enough to buy a loaf of bread.

#13 ·
July 18, 2012 at 3:21pm ·
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show BrentB67's comment (#14) ←

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Re: And Barack Obama Spoke All These Words, Saying...

BrentB67

Natalie:

Have I missed anything?· _{· 20 minutes ago}

#14 ·
July 18, 2012 at 3:35pm ·
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show Songwriter's comment (#15) ←

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Re: And Barack Obama Spoke All These Words, Saying...

Songwriter

Terrific satire, Natalie. Spot on.

Only I'm a little concerned that at this very moment, some White House minion is making these very suggestions as serious policy.

#15 ·
July 18, 2012 at 4:28pm ·
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show Paul Dougherty's comment (#16) ←

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Re: And Barack Obama Spoke All These Words, Saying...

Paul Dougherty

President Obama should grace the trillion dollar note. Fitting for one who has rendered a billion almost passe.

#16 ·
July 18, 2012 at 5:17pm ·
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show David Williamson's comment (#17) ←

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Re: And Barack Obama Spoke All These Words, Saying...

David Williamson

When the leader thinks he's bigger than the constitution, you have tyranny

#17 ·
July 18, 2012 at 5:56pm ·
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show ctruppi's comment (#18) ←

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Re: And Barack Obama Spoke All These Words, Saying...

ctruppi

David Williamson: When the leader thinks he's bigger than the constitution, you have tyranny · _{49 minutes ago}

Scary stuff. I have often said that we're not at the end of the Roman Empire as some would have us believe. Rather we are at the end of the Roman Republic when men like Sulla, Julius and then Octavian solidify their authority and destroy individual liberty all in the name of "the people".

Natalie's excellent satirical post coupled with your link does not assuage that fear at all!!