Amish Terrorists
EJHill ·
November 23, 2011 at 10:12pm
And now, LIVE from Millersburg, Ohio, coming off a smash engagement at Grandma Yoder's B&B, we give you the nation's first Amish terrorists, complete with Federal indictment for "hate crimes," the Mullet and Miller Quintet!
I kid you not. From this morning's Cleveland Plain Dealer:
"The leader of a splinter Amish sect was charged today with conspiracy to commit federal hate crimes, accused of directing his sons and followers to cut the beards and hair of Amish leaders who refused to support his decisions."
The complete sordid tale can be read on the PD web site.
Next up: #OccupyTheHorseAndBuggy
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Comments:
Aug '10
Re: Amish Terrorists
Life in the Amish 'hood is rough, ain't it?
Aug '11
Re: Amish Terrorists
It's getting more and more difficult to be an American in Europe, (as if it weren't hard enough in its own sake,) what with serial child rapist football coaches, labor unions stealing money from disabled children, border police put in jail if they do their job, and now hate-crimes for beard-cutting.
I tell you, they're laughing at me, and especially now, since there's a few Spaniards who still thought the Amish and the Mormons were the same thing, now they're asking me when I'm going to grow mine out. (I'm Mormon, not Amish.)
And now that they're on their way back towards the political center, with the Popular (People's) Party, I can't make fun of their Socialist Spanish Workers Party anymore.
At least we'll always have bent bananas and dehydrated water.
Edited on November 23, 2011 at 10:58pmMay '10
Re: Amish Terrorists
What is this, Brussels? How can such a crime even exist in America? What an embarrassment.
Nov '11
Re: Amish Terrorists
Agree this trial is the latest production of the "Theatre of the Absurd," but am also reminded of why I have always had an aversion to communal living (even dorm rooms).
Yuck... no thanks!
Apr '11
Re: Amish Terrorists
"I may disagree with the Amish choice of haircut, but I will defend to the point of using the coercive force the right to have them."
I do think that attacking your fellow Amish should be a criminal offense, but it is completely beyond me to understand how there is an interstate commerce hook here. Normally you get it through the use of phones, interstates, and other channels or instrumentalities of interstate commerce, but I'd have thought the Amish were pretty good at avoiding that.
I don't know Ohio law well, but I'd imagine that they have conspiracy laws that would cover hate crimes (and Ohio definitely has hate crime laws). It's odd to see hate crime legislature being used to criticize internal dissent within a community, though; traditionally hate crimes are for people who think poorly of the protected category, or a sub category of that.
Conspiracy to commit assault, though? These guys should be going down, in Ohio courts. (Unless they're innocent).
Dec '10
Re: Amish Terrorists
As spokesman of CAAR (Council on American-Amish Relations), I reiterate the call for the end of such vicious, bigoted discrimination.
This will, of course, only happen with the the payment of huge amounts of money to my organization.
Nov '10
Re: Amish Terrorists
Amophobia!
Nov '11
Re: Amish Terrorists
No, commune-o-phobia!
Dec '10
Re: Amish Terrorists
Quick let's alert Eric Holder. He's still trying to determine the meaning of the phrase "Allahu Akbar". Since he was sure it could not have had anything to do with Jihad he embarked on a linguistic survey of all known languages. The survey will be done in a few decades and should only cost a few billion. I'm sure when Holder sees the gravity of this new case he'll act accordingly and immediately go for the maximum sentence.
Justice, Justice you shall pursue. However, if your just Stupid, Stupid it's not going to make much difference.
Dec '10
Re: Amish Terrorists
EJ - why're you picking on the Aamish with your mean old fauxtography! What'd they ever do to you?
/hazard of being good at what you do
All kidding aside, I feel pretty bad about this case. My brother works among the Amish in the Millersburg area, and he likes having them as neighbors and co-workers. My older sibs grew up going to school with Yoder kids, and my little family and I try to visit Amish Country whenever we get back there.
Such internal strife among otherwise peaceable people is disheartening.
Nov '11
Re: Amish Terrorists
Western Chauvinist:
Such internal strife among otherwise peaceable people is disheartening.
Nothing is ever what it appears to be, particularly among communities that close themselves off from the rest of the world. There are hair-raising stories to be told of the Hasidic communities in Brooklyn, NY, as well.
May '10
Re: Amish Terrorists
I'll say hello next time we run into each other...
I've lived in Amish areas most of my life. They are hard working people but the idea that technology peaked in, say, 1857 is beyond me. But what is truly disturbing is that these people have so cloistered themselves from the rest of society that their children are being afflicted with genetic diseases so rare and previously unseen that some aren't even named yet.
Women who have left the community to care for these children with modern medicine often discover that their husbands were related to them before marriage.
For more see the 60 Minutes report here.
Aug '10
Re: Amish Terrorists
On reading this, a corner of my brain reflexively retrieved the date from the mental database and noted that, no, it is not April 1.
Perhaps the creepiest thing in the story is this: "All the men arrested on the hate crimes charges are being held without bond." Isn't that the sort of status that is reserved for murderers? Or has liberalism convinced itself that "hate" is right up there with "killing" in their schedule of sins?
Edited on November 24, 2011 at 6:14amJul '10
Re: Amish Terrorists
Clip clop, clip clop, clip clop.
Bang Bang Bang
Clip clop, clip clop, clip clop.
[Amish drive-by shooting]
Apr '11
Re: Amish Terrorists
Midget Faded Rattlesnake,
Darn! You're right on it! First link I thought of when I saw this post!
These dudes really should have turned the other cheek...fool!
Looks like I'll have to go to my other favorite pop culture reference to the Amish:
Ever since I saw this episode of "Mr. Belvedere" during my formative years I've had a thing for Amish gals.
May '10
Re: Amish Terrorists
Twelve Angry Mennonites.
Sep '11
Re: Amish Terrorists
Posted about a month ago....