America Returns to Its Senses: Charlie Sheen Not Winning
Even for Hollywood, even for a drug-fueled breakdown, this was fast. The rumor last week was that Charlie Sheen and Warner Brothers, the studio that produces his popular (and profitable) comedy, Two and a Half Men, were talking about burying the hatchet and getting back into production. Now, from Deadline Hollywood, we hear it's sorta/kinda really happening, and why:
There's a reason Charlie Sheen is fighting for his day job. Reports from around the country are that his planned "Violent Torpedo Of Truth" tour, featuring a 21-venue live show, still has plenty of tickets available and are by no means sold out as previously claimed. The show itself is supposed to be a 70-minute rant by Sheen aided by the audience, multimedia and a few of Sheen's "goddesses." If all goes as planned, Charlie is supposed to pocket $7 million, including sales of Sheen merchandise. But CNBC reports some tickets are on sale for less than face value because they were purchased by secondary sellers who now "are bleeding Tiger Blood on their investment."
Money can drive people apart, but money can also knit them back together. What Charlie Sheen has discovered, apparently, is that there isn't a better gig anywhere, anyhow, for an actor than appearing on a popular television comedy. The hours are great and the money is fantastic.
That's sort of how it works in every part of the entertainment business. What keeps the performers in line -- actors, comedians, professional athletes -- isn't so much the size of the inflow (they all make loads and loads of money) but the size of their personal outflows (they all spend loads and loads more). In a delicious bit of irony, Charlie Sheen can't afford to be Charlie Sheen unless he keeps showing up for work on Two and a Half Men.
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Jun '10
Re: America Returns to Its Senses: Charlie Sheen Not Winning
Not to get too pedantic/philosophical about Sheen, but isn't this simply another example of the danger of hubris. The moment you feel you are subject to no limitations, you're in trouble. Pride goeth before a fall.
Edited on Mar 28, 2011 at 4:50pmRe: America Returns to Its Senses: Charlie Sheen Not Winning
Ugh. I just find this all so revolting. The guy's going to be forgiven. Why is there a world where you can curse out your boss, make ethnic slurs about him/her, take a brief hiatus/vacation with prostitutes, and be given back your job and astronomical salary without so much as an apology? Barf. It angers me, even though it shouldn't. I know money is the reason. It just depresses me, is all.
Mar '11
Re: America Returns to Its Senses: Charlie Sheen Not Winning
As President of the Player's Association, Patrick Ewing, once said during contract negotiations, "Sure NBA players make a lot of money, but we spend a lot too."
Re: America Returns to Its Senses: Charlie Sheen Not Winning
I suppose it won't make you feel any better to learn that he'll probably have to take a pay cut? From $2 million per episode to, maybe, $1.7 million?
Feel better?
Didn't think so.
Sep '10
Re: America Returns to Its Senses: Charlie Sheen Not Winning
Rob, would the show runner really be able to work with this guy again? And if the show runner refuses, would the studio fire him?
Aug '10
Re: America Returns to Its Senses: Charlie Sheen Not Winning
So Rob...how will the scripts change in order to maximize the return of the coked out satyr ? Not having ever seen the show, I can only guess at the general thrust of the storyline, but your views would be instructive as to how the tie-ins with the hookers and blow will become apparent. Of course, answering that may compromise one's standing in the guild, so perhaps we should ask another writer. Do you have Nathanael West's email ?
Jul '10
Re: America Returns to Its Senses: Charlie Sheen Not Winning
Ursula Hennessey: Ugh. I just find this all so revolting. The guy's going to be forgiven. Why is there a world where you can curse out your boss, make ethnic slurs about him/her, take a brief hiatus/vacation with prostitutes, and be given back your job and astronomical salary without so much as an apology? Barf. It angers me, even though it shouldn't. I know money is the reason. It just depresses me, is all.
If it makes you feel any better, this arse will always be an object of scorn and ridicule in the Sisyphus household. Whenever he appears on the Sisyphus screen, there will be comments about the white smudge under his nose, that worried look indicating that one of his "goddesses" has shared something vile with "little Chucky". And, of course, there is the sudden, 8.3 richter scale collapse of the Martin Sheen parenting workshop, where a giant hand reached up out of the ground and dragged the entire facility, staff and all, into the abyss å la Carrie.
And which brother will star in the hit movie, the Sheen Comes Off, about the rise and fall of a television clown?
Jul '10
Re: America Returns to Its Senses: Charlie Sheen Not Winning
Charlie Sheen floundering and ticket scalpers taken to the cleaners?
And it isn't even my birthday!
May '10
Re: America Returns to Its Senses: Charlie Sheen Not Winning
Surely there are some counter-examples of this phenomenon. Like, a thrifty and provident actor/musician. Goes against the grain, as numbers don't seem to have meaning to a lot of these guys (though you'd think a truly talented musician would be good at math). I bet Bob Newhart planned his retirement way in advance. Then again, he began as an accountant, not a comedian.
It always bugs me when people speculate "what's next for Katie Couric?" Like, shouldn't she retire? Does she not exist if she's not on teevee constantly? Apparently not. It's a disease.
Feb '11
Re: America Returns to Its Senses: Charlie Sheen Not Winning
Rob Long: "In a delicious bit of irony, Charlie Sheen can't afford to be Charlie Sheen unless he keeps showing up for work on Two and a Half Men."
Real question is, will the audience continue to show up? This current season, the show (writing) has been really stale and there's a definite change in Sheen's appearance -- face is showing effects of the alcohol and drugs.