A Commencement Address That Won't Make You Cringe. It May Even Move You.
Commencement addresses are not what they used to be.
Andy Ferguson of the Weekly Standard summed it up perfectly last year:
...every list of the best commencement speeches has a token appearance by at least one dead person. Time magazine, in a list got out last year, was typical in including the address delivered at Harvard by George Marshall in 1947 and President Kennedy’s speech at American University in 1963. Marshall used his speech to announce his plan to rebuild the postwar European economy, and Kennedy used his to argue for an international ban on the testing of nuclear weapons.
What strikes you most about these remarks is their elevated tone. To the youthful ear they must sound Victorian in their formality. “I need not tell you gentlemen that the world situation is very serious,” the jowly old secretary of state rumbled to the Harvard Class of ’47. “I commend all those who are today graduating,” Kennedy said at American, and went on to quote Woodrow Wilson’s assertion that “every man sent out from a university should be a man of his nation as well as a man of his time.”
“I am confident,” Kennedy continued, “that the men and women who carry the honor of graduating from this institution will continue to give from their lives, from their talents, a high measure of public service and public support.”
These days, he notes, commencement speakers are way less serious. These speakers, if they are "public intellectuals," deliver something like advice--"Begin with that most terrifying of all things, a clean slate," one began, "Then look, every day, at the choices you are making, and when you ask yourself why you are making them, find this answer: for me, for me!” Or, if they are celebrities, which many of them are, they deliver stand-up comic routines.
I've seen both kinds, and forced to choose, I would go with the latter. It's at least entertaining.
My graduation year, 2009, Dartmouth's commencement speaker was of the dreaded "public intellectuals" variety: novelist Louise Erdrich. She delivered a meandering and uninspiring address--I seem to recall some words about climate change and feminism. What's worse is that this woman, a Dartmouth graduate, didn't seem to like her alma mater too much, and that sentiment came out in her speech. And it didn't fly over to well among us graduates, most of whom did love our Dartmouth experience.
So when I heard that comedian Conan O'Brien was slated as Dartmouth's commencement speaker this year, I was pleasantly surprised, partly (mostly) because my expectations were pretty low. I was expecting to be entertained and was hoping that the speech would not get political in any way.
My concern about politics lay in this fact: Dartmouth was awarding an honorary degree to President George H.W. Bush this year, as Peter notes. Predictably, when the overwhelmingly liberal faculty and students found out about this, they created a fuss--protests, petitions, etc--in the lead up to graduation. And, even, during graduation: in the portion of the ceremony when the wheelchair-bound Bush received his honorary degree, a small handful of the graduating students stood up and held signs of protest. It was shameful. Luckily, they were overshadowed by the crowd, who honored the former president with a standing ovation.
And when the time came for the commencement speech, Conan honored Bush in his own way:
Before I begin, I must point out that behind me sits a highly admired President of the United States and decorated war hero while I, a cable television talk show host, has been chosen to stand here and impart wisdom. I pray I never witness a more damning example of what is wrong with America today.
Given the context, I thought that was pretty classy.
The rest of Conan's speech was, of course, funny. But near the end, he did impart some actual wisdom. It was moving:
Eleven years ago I gave an address to a graduating class at Harvard. I have not spoken at a graduation since because I thought I had nothing left to say. But then 2010 came. And now I'm here, three thousand miles from my home, because I learned a hard but profound lesson last year and I'd like to share it with you. In 2000, I told graduates "Don't be afraid to fail." Well now I'm here to tell you that, though you should not fear failure, you should do your very best to avoid it. Nietzsche famously said "Whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger." But what he failed to stress is that it almost kills you. Disappointment stings and, for driven, successful people like yourselves it is disorienting. What Nietzsche should have said is "Whatever doesn't kill you, makes you watch a lot of Cartoon Network and drink mid-price Chardonnay at 11 in the morning."
Now, by definition, Commencement speakers at an Ivy League college are considered successful. But a little over a year ago, I experienced a profound and very public disappointment. I did not get what I wanted, and I left a system that had nurtured and helped define me for the better part of 17 years. I went from being in the center of the grid to not only off the grid, but underneath the coffee table that the grid sits on, lost in the shag carpeting that is underneath the coffee table supporting the grid. It was the making of a career disaster, and a terrible analogy.
But then something spectacular happened. Fogbound, with no compass, and adrift, I started trying things. I grew a strange, cinnamon beard. I dove into the world of social media. I started tweeting my comedy. I threw together a national tour. I played the guitar. I did stand-up, wore a skin-tight blue leather suit, recorded an album, made a documentary, and frightened my friends and family. Ultimately, I abandoned all preconceived perceptions of my career path and stature and took a job on basic cable with a network most famous for showing reruns, along with sitcoms created by a tall, black man who dresses like an old, black woman. I did a lot of silly, unconventional, spontaneous and seemingly irrational things and guess what: with the exception of the blue leather suit, it was the most satisfying and fascinating year of my professional life. To this day I still don't understand exactly what happened, but I have never had more fun, been more challenged—and this is important—had more conviction about what I was doing.
How could this be true? Well, it's simple: There are few things more liberating in this life than having your worst fear realized.
Watch the rest of his speech here:
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Jul '10
Re: A Commencement Address That Won't Make You Cringe. It May Even Move You.
A sheltered millionaire was able to to indulge himself in activities such as twittering after not getting the Late Night Show gig?
Yes, he truly hit rock bottom.
Sep '10
Re: A Commencement Address That Won't Make You Cringe. It May Even Move You.
As someone who spends a lot of time on a shag rug underneath a coffee table I can only wish that he would have stayed longer.
Re: A Commencement Address That Won't Make You Cringe. It May Even Move You.
Lucky enough to have been present for Conan's speech in person, Emily, and I couldn't agree with you more. His address proved shrewd, hilarious--and unexpectedly moving.
For a quarter of an hour, Conan delivered laugh after laugh. A lot of it involved inside humor--you'd have to know something about the rivalries between different Ivy institutions to appreciate it--but that was what made it impressive. To produce those laughs--there must have been three or four dozen howlingly funny lines--Conan, or his writers, had to have done a lot of reading and research. He'd done his homework, in other words. He'd taken the event seriously. He'd written the speech for that one place and day alone. And he'd written the hardest thing anyone can write: a sustained item of genuine humor.
Jun '10
Re: A Commencement Address That Won't Make You Cringe. It May Even Move You.
A quite memorable and hilarious speech but needed the ending that O'Brien put on it so as not to be dismissed as trivial or sophomoric. I would agree that Conan probably didn't hit rock bottom and is probably reflective of his own situation through the prism of adulation and celebrity, however, it was a shock to the system, nonetheless and to anyone who has been on top of his game and feels the wind at his back to find themselves suddenly unemployed and grasping at fleeting prospects that don't pan out - well, let's just say that I know exactly how he felt and took some solace in what he had to say.
If there was ever an example of Conan's thesis of reinvention it was Ronald Reagan who reinvented himself at least five or six times in his lifetime...and thankfully for us when we most needed his leadership and vision.
May '10
Re: A Commencement Address That Won't Make You Cringe. It May Even Move You.
"...your perceived failure can become a catalyst for profound reinvention."
"Like many people, I thought that achieving that goal would define me as successful. But that is not true. No specific job or career goal defines me, and it should not define you."
"Work hard, be kind, and amazing things will happen."
Well said. Thanks, Emily.
Re: A Commencement Address That Won't Make You Cringe. It May Even Move You.
I really enjoyed Conan's speech. Light years better than Liberian President Ellen Sirleaf's speech my year. It was a hot, 100*+ day and no one could understand a word she was saying. Excruciating.
And then Hank Paulson's speech the year before. Lord, was that boring!
May '10
Re: A Commencement Address That Won't Make You Cringe. It May Even Move You.
I especially enjoyed his salute to Bush the Elder after his Code of Conduct violation. And poor Timmah Geithner can't catch a break. Where's the love?
Jun '10
Re: A Commencement Address That Won't Make You Cringe. It May Even Move You.
I didn't attend my college graduation. No desire to hear Ted Kennedy speak.
As for Conan's speech, I enjoyed much of it. However, he still bugs me with the sense of entitlement he projects about the Tonight Show gig. He admits it is the Holy Grail of comedy jobs, yet still seems to be gobsmacked that it was denied him. Really? In the cut throat world of network TV a promise wasn't kept? Shocking!!!! It makes him seem petulant & privleged to still be talking about it at length.
On the whole, a great speech with a fine delivery.
Sep '10
Re: A Commencement Address That Won't Make You Cringe. It May Even Move You.
"Something a bear uses at an AA meeting."
Gold, Jerry. Gold.