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The Week in Review — February 3, 2013

– In response to public skepticism about President Obama’s recent claim that he regularly goes skeet shooting while at Camp David, the White House on Friday released a photograph of the president in the act of firing a shotgun at the Maryland retreat. The controversy continued, however, when it was revealed that the photo had been cropped to conceal the image of Joe Biden downrange.

– The Boy Scouts of America announced that it may begin allowing local chapters to lift their prohibitions on gay scout masters and members. It is not yet known exactly what effect the shift would have on the day-to-day operations of the groups, though it is widely anticipated that merit badges will be added for interior design, theme parties, and table talk.

– It was reported this week that First Lady Michelle Obama has abandoned her “Let’s Move” campaign, emphasizing the benefits of healthy eating and physical fitness. In keeping with the new tone of the president’s second term, a new iteration of the program is expected to be introduced with the title, “Fine, Sit on Your Fat Ass. What Do I Care?”

– A new study from the Smithsonian revealed that outdoor cats are responsible for the deaths of up to 20.7 billion mammals a year. Upon hearing the news, U.N. Ambassador Susan Rice immediately began a whisper campaign alleging that packs of Himalayans have been stalking the Benghazi area.

– Public criticism grew over a lack of media scrutiny for New Jersey Senator Robert Menendez, who is accused of traveling to the Dominican Republic for trysts with young prostitutes. Conservative critics called Menendez “dishonest”, family values groups decried him as “morally suspect,” and former New York Governor Eliot Spitzer criticized him as “insufficiently imaginative.”

– A survey by the Public Religion Research Institute revealed that 27 percent of sports fans believe that God plays a role in determining which team wins. The other 73 percent live in Cleveland.

– On Wednesday, the New York Times revealed that its computers had been repeatedly targeted by hackers likely associated with the Chinese government. A national security official who wished to remain anonymous noted, “This is not nearly as big a deal as many outlets are making it out to be. The Chinese government was simply doing what thousands of Americans do every day — attempting to cancel a Times subscription.”

– Reports out of Moscow disclosed that President Vladimir Putin is attempting to combat faltering Russian fertility by staging a February concert featuring the R&B group Boyz II Men. Demographic experts speculated that the concert would set birth rates surging in 1994.

– In a variation on the famous “3 AM Call” from the 2008 presidential campaign, Secretary of Defense nominee Chuck Hagel was repeatedly awakened by tough foreign policy questions in the midst of his confirmation hearings.

  1. Nick Stuart

    The quip about the Boy Scouts brought a chuckle, then on reflection I thought “why am I laughing?” May as well laugh as cry I suppose.

    Here is the text of an email I just sent the BSA National Council:

    I am an Eagle Scout. Two of my sons are Eagle Scouts. Twelve years ago I helped start a troop and served as it’s Committee Chairman for 6 years. That troop has produced nearly 50 Eagle Scouts.

    In other words, I am deeply involved in scouting, and deeply concerned for its future if National Council changes its policy on participation by openly homosexual scouts and scouters.

    Leaving it to the local unit is a cop-out. That will expose every local unit that maintains the ban on open homosexual participation to lawsuits. It will expose troops to homosexual activism at council events like camporees and summer camp.

    If the ban is lifted, it is likely our chartering organization will want to withdraw its support, and I will have no reason to argue against such an action.

    Dropping the ban will be an enormous mistake. Don’t do it.

    Spitting into the wind I suppose but had to speak up.

  2. Devereaux

    “… former New York Governor Eliot Spitzer criticized him as ‘insufficiently imaginative.’”

    Priceless!

  3. Yeah...ok.

    These WIR have been great fun. Are you going to get us hooked on them and then move it behind the paywall?

    When is the next podcast of Disillusioned Guns?

  4. UreyP3

    Wicked.  ;-)

  5. Scott R

    On the contrary, 100% of Clevelanders believe that God has a hand in sports. The supernatural is the only explanation for The Drive, The Fumble, Red Right 88, Mesa’s Blown Save, Jim Chones’ Broken Foot, The Shot, LeBron’s Decision, and on.

    God exists; He cares; He’s damned Cleveland. Once a Clevelander makes peace with that, rooting for the Browns, Indians, and Cavs is pleasant in spite of it all.

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