AsmaAlAssad.jpg

Anna Wintour: Send Our Gal to Damascus!

When I read Troy Senik’s recent post and learned that President Obama is thinking about nominating Anna Wintour, the editor of Vogue, as our ambassador to London or Paris, my first thought was that neither of these two capitals is appropriate. I do believe that, if justice were to be done, Anna Wintour really would be given an ambassadorship. And, in my judgment, she would be the perfect person to represent us in Damascus. She is certainly well connected.

To see what I have in mind, all that you have to do is to pull off your shelf the March, 2011 issue of Vogue, which features a profile of the Syrian dictator’s wife entitled Asma al-Assad: A Rose in the Desert. Alas, I am afraid that, if you click on the link I just provided, you will get a page on the Vogue website in which you are told, “Oops, the page you are looking for cannot be found.” Not to worry, however. although Anna may not want you to see her handiwork, it has been preserved for your delectation by some opponents of Bashar al-Assad at this easy to find site.

It begins, as you can see, by telling us that “Asma al-Assad, Syria’s dynamic first lady, is on a mission to create a beacon of culture and secularism in a powder-keg region – and to put a modern face on her husband’s regime.” As I explained in a post on Ricochet at the time, the lady in question is everything that Vogue readers are supposed to admire:

“glamorous, young, and very chic – the freshest and most magnetic of first ladies. Her style is not the counture-and-bling dazzle of Middle Eastern power but a deliberate lack of adornment. She’s a rare combination: a thin, long-limbed beauty with a trained analytic mind who dresses with cunning understatement. Paris Match calls her ‘the element of light in a country full of shadow zones.’ She is the first lady of Syria.”

Now I will readily admit that Bashar al-Assad has an eye for the ladies. If we are to judge by the photographs taken by James Nachtwey for Vogue, we have to admit that Asma al-Assad is easy on the eye. “Dark-brown eyes, wavy chin-length brown hair, long neck, an energetic grace. No watch, no jewelry apart from Chanel agates around her neck, not even a wedding ring, but fingernails lacquered a dark blue-green.” You get the picture: a classy dame – well worthy of your admiration – what every woman wants to be, and what every man desires.

One has to wonder, nonetheless, just how much her husband’s minions paid Vogue to have Joan Juliet Buck write regarding Syria that “it’s a secular country where women earn as much as men and the Muslim veil is forbidden in universities, a place without bombings, unrest, or kidnappings” and to remark that “Asma’s husband, Bashar al-Assad, was elected president in 2000, after the death of his father, Hafez al-Assad, with a startling 97 percent of the vote.”

Of course, Ms. Buck is not stupid. She provides herself with ample cover. When she speaks of Syria as “the safest country in the Middle East,” she acknowledges that “the State Department’s Web site says, ‘the Syrian government conducts intense physical and electronic surveillance of both Syrian citizens and foreign visitors,” and she prefaces her discussion of Assad’s election with the observation that Syria’s “shadow zones are deep and dark.” But this literary maneuver is not only self-protective; it also serves to increase the Syrian tyranny’s allure. Who, after all, would not want to explore “shadow zones” that are, ahem, “deep and dark.”

I will not spoil all the fun. You can read the article for yourself. In it, you will earn about Asma’s education in computer science, her career at JP Morgan in London, the beginnings of her whirlwind romance with the son of the president of Syria, and their marriage nine years ago not long after he succeeded his father. You will be told about the visit of Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt, and you will be taken on a tour of the apartment Asma shares with Bashar and their children. You will be told that “the household is run on wildly democratic principles.” It is all quite endearing.

So, say I, let Anna Wintour have the honor she deserves. Send her to Damascus to cavort with the Syrian dictator and his beautiful bride in those “shadow zones” that are so “deep and dark.”

  1. Paul A. Rahe
    C
    jetstream: Professor, you are such a cad … · 10 hours ago

    I am indeed a bad man. I think that Hillary should be sent to Tripoli. Surely, she was the one who denied extra security to our facilities in Libya.

  2. Barkha Herman

    I second that.  Either that, or Susan Rice would do.  Rice seems to have expertise in matters of conflicted middle eastern regions.

  3. Kervinlee

    Say – whatever became of Clara Petacci?

  4. Paul Dougherty

    This will not end well for Asma or her children. Just an observation.

  5. flownover

    Thanks Professor, Instapundit agrees.

    She and John Kerry need to dip their hands in the buckets of blood that Assad creates. At least before those buckets are toxic with sarin.

    because that would be beyond the pale, killing kids with gas instead of bullets !!

    Kafka could never imagine this. It’s too fantastic. And a nominee for SecState called him “dear friend” ????

    Dumbfounded.

  6. jetstream

    Professor, you are such a cad …

  7. Indaba

    Perfect career path for the lady. The article and photo of the blue jeaned family playing with tech toys was surreal.

  8. Schrodinger

    Wintour to Damascus.

    Rice to Benghazi.

  9. Cunctator

    Stolen from @iowahawk – “the infidel wears Prada”

  10. Pencilvania

    Or, the Wintour of our Malcontent.

  11. Kamakazi

    Dr. Rahe, the magnificent, the brilliant the inspiration.  This is how we need to fight the left.  Offense!  Show them for who they are over and over again.   Then repeat :)

  12. Roberto
    Paul A. Rahe: So, say I, let Anna Wintour have the honor she deserves. Send her to Damascus to cavort with the Syrian dictator and his beautiful bride in those “shadow zones” that are so “deep and dark.” · · 1 hour ago

    Henceforth it should be arranged that all inquires regarding  poetic justice are simply redirected to your missive.

  13. Barbara Kidder

    The American press has a long-standing record of serving the public relations needs of various despots  throughout the world since an ‘agrarian reformer’, by the name of  Fidel Castro, was ‘organizing workers’ in Cuba in the 1950s.

     For the years leading up to  Castro’s victory, and subsequent  revelation that his was, in fact, a “Communist Revolution”, The New York  Times was telling its readers that Fidel Castro was, ” the George Washington of the Sierra Maestra”!

  14. jetstream
    Paul A. Rahe

    jetstream: Professor, you are such a cad … · 10 hours ago

    I am indeed a bad man. I think that Hillary should be sent to Tripoli. Surely, she was the one who denied extra security to our facilities in Libya. · 2 hours ago

    Unless the karma in our region of the universe has been completely depleted, that is the only just scenario.  I guess there is some small amount of satisfaction, in the thought, that in one of the infinite number of string theory sponsored universes, Hillary is already in Tripoli …

  15. kylez

    yes.

    or how about St. Helena?

  16. jarhead
    C

    Professor, that’s the best idea I’ve heard since the election!

Want to comment on stories like these? Become a member today!

You'll have access to:

  • All Ricochet articles, posts and podcasts.
  • The conversation amongst our members.
  • The opportunity share your Ricochet experiences.

Join Today!

Already a Member? Sign In