Bio
- I once wrote an opera, but have since lost the napkin.
- For a few years in the late 90's I was the world's most successful merchant of certified, award-winning Combat Hamsters (As Seen on TV!).
- At least until the lawsuits started.
- Life Lesson No. 4,360: Sell some militant rodents to one lousy dictator who can't follow simple care instructions and all of a sudden INTERPOL considers you an "Illegal Arms Trafficker".
- After that I sunk all my hamster money into an open range fur-bearing trout farm.
- Life Lesson No. 5,186: Wet fur makes trout sink.
- Next was a 40,000 acre Jackelope Ranch.
- I'm still trying to figure out what the hell they're good for.
- I once tried to perform a frontal lobotomy on myself, but the knife slipped.
- I've never seen Elvis.
- I'm still a wanted fugitive in Peru, thanks largely to the combat hamster episode(s).
- I can read ancient Egyptian hieroglyphs in the original Sanskrit.
- I know why we drive on parkways and park on driveways.
- In hindsight, those hamsters were worth way more than two easy payments of $199.95 each.
People Ajax Telamônios is Following (12)
People Following Ajax Telamônios (4)
Conversations Ajax Telamônios is Following (293)
Display starting at 293 of 293 followed conversations
Conversations Ajax Telamônios has Started (26)
Display starting at 26 of 26 user conversations
Re: Introducing the Obama Scandal Bracket!
My money's on the AP phone records because, as we all know, this is the only scandal about which the press will actually give a damn.